Those with a demanding career: Do you feel that your partner understands your dedication to your career?

Question

Bridgewater: WTF are you rambling about? You don't even know where I work and what I do LOL. For you to write THAT much analysis about something you have no clue of, it seems like you need to focus minding your own business. Why don't you work on managing that :)

Answer 1

I do not understand that.

If you take two hours out to watch a movie and forget about work for a bit, the entire company is going to go to h**l?

Just remember one thing: a good job doesn't love you back.

Answer 2

That is a great question, BTW! Can you seriously blame the guy you barely know for feeling a bit insecure competing with your job and its demands? No one likes to be ignored, especially in a very beginning of your relationship. So, no matter how important your job is to you, do give poor guy a chance to impress you by being brilliant and witty. However, you will never find out just how charming he could be, if you don't give him a chance and stress free time to demonstrate his better qualities. I married my man, when I was a college student and he did not anticipate the kind of career he would have to be dealing with later in our life. Actually, he was hoping for a very traditional family with a wife at home with children and him being a breadwinner. It did not turn out like that at all. However, when I was faced with opportunity of a lifetime, he did not stop me from grabbing it with both hands. He encouraged me, because he loves me that much. My point is: don't prejudge your relationship, because you do not know ahead of time what this particular man is made of. He could be a true winner, so just give him a chance to show it. Best of luck!

Answer 3

Want to know what?  My husband is a physician, and even he makes time for himself.

My dear, you say you are a "manager", but you are managing nothing.  You are a clerk, if you have to check email in the middle of movies, and nothing more.  A "manager" with any sort of responsibility, especially over an operation on "both coasts", should have plenty of authority to assign duties to people so that she does not have to constantly keep her finger on the pulse of an organization.

While I agree that to some people it is a status symbol to advertise that you are always in demand and always on call, it grows old faster than you can gather praise.  A good manager quickly learns, that delegating is the best talent they will ever acquire.  A good manager makes an unlimited amount of family and private time, because only the most critical and unusual emergencies find their way to the manager.  The rest of the issues are handled by the well-trained staff and reported back to you during normal business hours.

If you are unable to manage your way out of your current situation, don't be surprised when people who work less, get promoted faster.  I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but managers manage, they don't do clerical work.  If you're called a "manager", but are required to do the clerical work, you have been fooled, and you're not on much of a career path, I might add.

Answer 4

That's the biggest problem with me.  But it mainly revolves around they'll have problems and I'll be stuck somewhere else not being able to help them.

Answer 5

My "career" (working at the station) is far less demanding than that of the guy I'm seeing (taking two spring classes at once). I support him, but it's really difficult not being able to see or talk to him as much as I could in the winter.

Answer 6

Men don't normally understand a driven woman.  They call that trait agressive when it applies to them.  They refer to it a b***** in women, and seem to think she can't balance a career and a relationship--because they cannot.  Women have been doing JUST this for many years, and doing it quite well.  They need to get over themselves.

Answer 7

i feel that life is too short for ANYONE to be that dedicated to thier career and checking a black berry on a date is rude no matter if you are a man or a woman.  There is more to life than a career.  Most ppl will get angry at your dedication to your career because when you are with them you are not really 'there'.  Of course a man who is dedicated to his career will understand you because you are both not 'present' in the relationship so you can both have fun building a nonexistant, empty relationship in which you are basically keeping each othe company between texts.  I agree with bridge water betty.  It has nothing to do with traditional gender roles.  Its about every person allowing then selves to actually live life instead of being attached to  thier careers.  No one is needed 24/7 and if you are then u are being had.

Answer 8

I think its very important for your partner to understand your drive and passion.  My man seems to be very supportive.  He understands when I have to do hours of homework.  He comforts me when I get upset about an A- (d@mn A-s!!).  He knows I have a long time before I reach my goal and he's been understanding so far.  Of course, I always try to understand that he has papers to grade or lesson plans to write.  So I think it needs to go both ways.  I wouldn't expect him to support my time consuming career (or efforts towards said career) if I was demanding that he take time from his.  So we try to spend time together (each with our respective books open) and do the best we can.

Answer 9

If you're truly a driven, resourceful, intelligent and educated woman, you'll be able to make a living without it being detrimental to your personal life.

No one wants to be with a workaholic.

What would be the point of being in a relationship if you can't be with your partner?