Thoughts on daycare?

Question

Do you think that children who attend group childcare (daycare, private babysitter, preschool, nursery school, etcl) are at an advantage socially and cognitively when they start kindergarden compared to their peers who did not attend group child care?

Answer 1

All three of my children went to Pre-school and it definately made the transition to Kindergarden much easier. They were used to being with other kids' and following teacher's direction, also they were used to being gone from home for a few hours.

They were also ahead with their letters, numbers, cutting, and things like that.

There were always a few children who didn't attend anything before kindergarten and sometimes they had seperation anxiety and would cry when Mom or Dad left. Also a few who did not know how to write their name or even simple 1-10 or ABC's.

Kindergarden is for teaching those basics but the teachers prefer it if your kids' have some knowlege of the basics when entering. But kids do usually pick up quick.

I think it is better just to have them in a group setting with other kids' and rules before they go, then they are more socially prepared. Also kids that haven't attended pre-school or nursery school, once they start kindergarden for the first week or so are usually really tired and grumpy after school because they are not used to it.

Answer 2

I've been a stay at home mom and thought I was doing what was best for my kids by being home with them every day.

But my oldest started school this year and I'm realizing that, even if only once a week, they should have been in day care all along. She's having a lot of difficulty with adjusting to the classroom setting and social interactions with kids that aren't her sister or cousins.

If I had it to do over again, I would have balanced it better.

Answer 3

I definately do not. I am finishing my job next Friday to prepare for our son that is coming in November. We made the decision because neither of us believe in having our baby in daycare especially not a 6 weeks. Don't get me wrong I know that some people do not have a choice in the matter and they have to work. I am not saying that daycare is the devil. I have just experienced some things with children in daycare and their behavior compared to others...for me I want to know more about my child then a teacher...My mother stayed home with me and my sister and we have both always had an easy time adapting...I'm sure it is like anything else and there are exceptions and variety in every situation.

Answer 4

socially and cognitively... yes

My 3 year old son is living proof of that.  If you saw him around my friends children who stay at home, you would understand why I say that.  

But, if daycare isn't an option for someone for whatever reason, a child being around other children (play groups, etc), would help also.

I wouldn't say a nursery but starting at around the age of 18 months, yes, it does help for the reasons you listed.

Answer 5

Both have advantages and disadvantages. The pro's and con's range across social behavior, immune system development and many more categories. One is not better than the other, but the fit different needs and different values. It really depends on what you want to instill upon your child, and what priorities you have in life.

IMO however, it's neither better nor worse to have your child goo though child care over being raised at home.  

Answer 6

Well, I don't have a personal experience on this yet, but I do think that being in daycare is one of the best decisions I've made for my son so far.  And by that I mean being in daycare rather than being at home with a family member and having no other kids for him to play with.  

I've seen him grow so much socially over the past few months, and I really believe that being around the other kids his age in daycare has helped him.  He loves it there and all the kids and the teachers.  I'm really happy with his daycare.

Answer 7

not at all...my daughter never went to daycare(she is now 10 yrs old)..I was a  stay at home mother and when she went to kindergarten, she was very smart and the teachers could not believe she was not in some sort of daycare setting. I taught her some things at home and took her out socially quite often when she was a toddler.  she was a very outgoing child when she  started school and still is.

Answer 8

I am going to answer this both as a parent and a future teacher.

From personal experience, my daughter has been in daycare full time since she was a year old (before that it was less than 15 hours a week starting at 7 months).  I stay on those daycares like a hawk and she has been to four different centers.  She started Kindergarten last year with out a hitch.  The day she went to school we had no tears no tramua no issues.  I saw a lot of kids who were in shambles and pretty upset.  Later on I found that these were kids that had stayed home.

As far as her learning, I contribute her high ability not only to a great daycare but also the things we did at home.  She was ahead is most areas.

However as some one who as observed a lot of kids, I have seen kids that have come out of daycares and not known therir letters or numbers.  I have also seen kids that stayed at home and could not do them either.  But i have seen kids that stayed at home that could read and spell in kinder.

So it is all dependent on the facility, activities, the child and the parent.

Answer 9

No I do not.  In daycare children are not given the attention and well, let's face it, love from their parents throughout the day that they need to grow to their full potential.  It's survival of the fittest in daycare and it's bite, claw, hit, scream, push, shove and whatever else needs to be done to get the attention that they need, even if the attention that they get after doing those things is negative attention.  It's not true for all children, but it is for most.  My daughter was in daycare (a very good, small daycare) until she was 18 months old.  She was hit, kicked, bit, pinched by other kids, and we hated it.  The daycare provider, a very nice woman whom my husband and I had known for years, and she did punish kids who misbehaved, but that didn't stop the kids from doing mean things to other kids because they wanted attention, and in a daycare environment, they don't get the one on one attention that they need.  That's not the way that we wanted our daughter to turn out.  She still gets the socialization that she needs from playgroup which we go to two or three times a week for a couple of hours, during which time she plays with other kids and us moms talk and play with the kids.  I think that preschool is a great too though to get kids used to the classroom environment.  Most preschools last two or three hours in the morning or afternoon and are for children ages 4 years old.  At least around here that's how it is.  

I have a couple of friends who have their kids in daycare and many friends who do not have their kids in daycare.  I can tell a huge difference.  Even if the daycare kids act like little angels around mommy and daddy, when they get around other kids, it's hit, bite, pinch, whatever they need to do to get what they want.  Kids who aren't in daycare I have noticed either don't do that at all or not as much.  

One of my friend's daughters came over to play (she is a year younger than my daughter and she is also in daycare), and one time when she came over she would grab my daughter's chest and stomach and pinch really hard and twist her skin.  It left bruises and red marks and my daughter was crying.  I was so mad.  Another time, another friend's daughter came over and she is also in daycare.  My daughter was playing with a toy that the other girl wanted and so I told my daughter to share, so she gave the other little girl the toy to play with and the other little girl bit my daughter so hard on the arm that she punctured her skin and left a huge bruise that didn't go away for over a week.  

I'm not saying that all daycare kids are like this because I know that they are not.  And I'm not saying that all kids that don't go to daycare are well behaved, because they're not.  Kids are kids.  I'm just saying that maybe it's the second best choice, but most parents can't help it.  I know that most people wouldn't want to live the life that we live so that I can be home with our girls.  We live on a shoe string budget and it's pretty tough sometimes and my husband works 12 to 14 hour days to make it work.  Some people have to work and so they have to use daycare.  It all depends on your situation.  These are just my findings from being a mom and working in the daycare industry at one point.  

As far as the "being far ahead on language" thing goes, that's one of the reasons that we made the decision not to use daycare any more.  Our daughter was so far behind in language that it was terrible.  Now she's far ahead because I've been home to be able to work with her.  She's great on social skills too because well, that's the way that I teach her to be.  She plays well with other kids, interacts, listens and does well in a classroom environment (like Sunday school for example) and is just a really good kid.  

Daycare isn't "socialization" it's stressed out little kids not getting the attention that they need from daycare providers and survival of the fittest among toddlers.  That's what my husband and I found from our daycare experience with our kids, and mine from working in a daycare facility in college.  I don't mean to insult, so please, please don't take it that way!  :)

Answer 10

I'm a teacher's aide and I'm working on my degree in elementary education.   In the past, I've worked with Kindergartners and I firmly believe that children who are exposed to daycare, especially ones that are academically based are better off when they start school.  They have an easier time transitioning into school routines, better listening skills, better social skills, better coping skills.  They tend to have more advanced language.

I'm not saying that children who don't attend daycare are worse, because that's not true.  But, it's all about the opportunity.    I think daycare provides kids with a chance to learn socializing skills from a very young age and with lots of different individuals.  I tend to find children who have been exposed to daycare are more outgoing and more assure of themselves.   They don't need approval all the time.  They have learned to make decisions for themselves without always having to look for mom's approval, etc.  In daycare, children learn to take care of their belongs and be part of a whole group environment.  At home, parents can teach sharing and other skills; however, in daycare they are actively participating learning to be a member of a large group/society/culture from a young age.  It fosters more independence.

Answer 11

My son went to daycare and was very well adjusted by the time he started kindergarten. His social skills were good, his reading and arithmetic levels were higher than kindergarten level because he already knew how to add single digit number up to 10, he knew how to count to 40 in Spanish, and his athletic abilities were high.

I can't really compare his development to a kid who didn't attend daycare or nursery school because I only have the one child so far (am pregnant with my 2nd) and I have no idea how many kids in his kindergarten class was starting school for the first time. I do know that a number of the kids in his class seemed a bit spoiled, selfish, and didn't play very well with others. But, just going off my son's development, the baby I'm carrying now will go to the same daycare and hopefully have an equally advanced development.

Answer 12

Yes and no. I have four daughters and none of them went to daycare because I am a SAHM. When my girls turned four, they went to preschool and the following year they went to kindergarten. My oldest girls are ten and they are doing wonderfully in school.

the trick is to keep them socialized and learning even at home!

Answer 13

It really depends on the environment a child with a SAHM is raised in and what type of daycare the child attends.  I am a former kindergarten teacher and current SAHM, I plan to enroll my son in a part-time preschool (3 days per week, 2 hours per day) the year prior to him starting kindergarten.  This is just for him to get used to a school structure (which cannot be duplicated at home).

Answer 14

I would think so, because then they know how to be with other kids their own age without their mom or dad. If you're with them every single day before kindergarden, they won't know how to be without you, and probably won't learn for a while.  

Answer 15

No, I do not think kids in daycare are at an advantage socially or cognitively, but then I wouldn't care if there were that type of advantage because I believe the best place for kids to be when they are babies and toddlers is with their parents.  Nobody is going to care for your child the way you do, period.

Answer 16

Didn't you ask this question already?  

Answer 17

Do I think they are at an advantage?  Not necessarily.

Do I think they are at a disadvantage?  Not necessarily.

I don't think you can make blanket judgments like that.  It depends upon so many factors.

If a child is at home, is the parent or caregiver attentive?  Are they stimulating the child to learn?  If so, then that child would be at an advantage over a child in a low-quality childcare with high child to adult ratios and no enrichment program.

If the child is at home with a parent or caregiver and the person puts them in front of the TV too much, neglects or even abuses them; then certainly that child will be at a disadvantage as compared to a child in a high quality childcare program with many enrichment activities and low child to adult ratios.

I have worked in many childcare facilities, some excellent and some worst of the worst.

I am a SAHM however I plan to enroll my children in a nursery school program when they're 3 or 4 depending upon their readiness for it.

My mother stayed home and I could read and write before I went to Kindegarten.  I was BORED TO DEATH in Kindegarten.  I remember being soooooo bored because I knew everything I was learning about.

I think that as long as a child gets attention, love, and enriching activities then they will have a good start.  I have no desire to put my babies in daycare but I would if I had to.  I don't want to, though.  I am their mommy.

Answer 18

No, my son is 4 and well advanced compared to most kids...m daughter is 2 and speaks better then alot of kids her age and they have never been in daycare. I however think it may be good for social activities if there are not alot of kids for them to socialize with when they are home...