To be successful or not?

Question

My whole life I hear people tell me to do what they expect out of me. Not only the people but the society and the world. I think about it and read some spiritual/philosophical texts and ponder; is it really worth it?

Some questioning and thoughts:

- Success is relative. No one wants the same thing. Mostly society demands something out of you. But everyone wants to succeed in their own way. Happiness is what we want. Not what the society wants from you.

- "Nothing fails like success." -Osho . Even if you do succeed and work hard, you really won't be happy. You just did what they expected you to do, when you really left yourself empty inside. What did you get? What is the purpose of having all the money and security when you are not happy and that is not what you want?

- Everyone has a different purpose in the universe. This is more of a spiritual thought. I believe everyone has their own purpose. In that case, how can we generalize?

Answer 1

To the relativity of success: it's only relative to the people that are made happy by fitting in and having a place. Doing a job society tells you to do gives them a place, lets them fit in.

To those who don't need a place or need to fit in, success is whatever they feel happy doing. Nobody will ever be entirely happy. If we were we wouldn't feel happy. You feel in comparasions an contradictions. If you give a hamburger to a homless person, they'll be happy, grateful even. Give Bill Gates a hamburger and he'd probably be angry that you annoyed him.

you can be successful, you just have to go for what you want. You have to know what you want

Answer 2

I agree, success is relative, and people in our lives and society place success on a different scale, depending on ourselves as individuals.   If someone has any limitations, like being blind, then there are simpler accomplishments that others see as a success.  When we go through our lives being intelligent and always excelling at every subject in school, and all our hobbies or sports, then that scale of success places greater expectations on us.  The more you do, the higher the bar is raised! It is a challenge, of course, but when you get that A, or break that record, etc...  you are once again reaching success.

Anyhow...  

I think success is somewhat of a natural thing in the world.  At a young age we are rewarded for doing something new that we could not do before. Like when we officially learn how to walk! How many times do our parents say, YEAH! You are AWESOME! And then they clap, grab us and show us love.  

So, even as simple of a task as walking, talking, etc....  we begin our lives learning we have to face challenges and when we overcome them, we have SUCCESS!

This happens so many times that it is all we know.  The problem arises as the challenges get harder and tougher throughout our life.  It would be silly to give you a treat, and verbally reward you for not wetting the bed anymore, at the age of 30.  We must learn determination, and push forward to accomplish the new goal at hand because we LOVE the feeling we get on the inside when we reach the goal.

I do not think you can live your life doing what others and society think you should be doing.  If we did this, I think it would take away individualism, which is something we fight for all the time.  

AND - if you do not take the time to do what you want that makes you happy, then NO, there is no amount of money, or materialistic items that can cure and change you.  Making the energy and effort to truly know yourself on the inside is priceless,and timeless for that matter,  and much more rewarding than any temporary materialistic object you can buy and enjoy.  

We were all born with everything inside us that is needed to succeed in this world.  The difference is some people use it, and others don't.

Thanks for reading!

Answer 3

Success means different things to different people.

Some people believe that you're only successful if you have a lot of money and wear nice clothes. You live in a beautiful home you bought on your own. You have a loving wife/husband who loves you and a few kids that are quite nice.

Others may disagree and say that success means hurting people to get to the top of the human food chain. These people will stop at nothing to be seen as "better" than you.

I think that if we were ALL given the opportunity, we could all succeed at something that makes us happy. Without having to hurt someone to make it happen. You can't call yourself successful if you're the child of "an American wealthy corporation owner" because you were born into that lifestyle and it's not actually yours anyway. If you use that money to actually help those who need it most, than maybe you could call yourself successful because 1) it makes you happy and 2) you're helping people in need.

Most people believe they're here to have power over others. As they climb the success ladder, do they find themselves happier? Most likely not. Those who say they do are putting up a front. Many people think that as long as they have a lot of money, they can just pay themselves nice vacations when they're sad. If you mask the problem by escaping, you still come home unhappy, so that's not even worth doing.

Is is worth it? Depends what you do with your success. If you only help the people who abuse you behind your back and are just around you to make money off you and give themselves the right to hurt people,then no it's not worth it at all.

If you use your success to HELP people who need it most, people who may not have had the same opportunities as you,  people you are NOT friends with, people who aren't just around you for the sake of being with a successful person (and most people around successful ones aren't there because they care), then successful you are. Success is not just about you but about how many people you help along the way to success and once you're there.

Everyone has their own purpose but not everyone will be able to figure out what that purpose is. Or be able to accomplish it if they already do know what it is. If there were less people trying to stomp on toes and hurt others and lie and spread rumors and all that c**p, we'd all be able to live successfully without being side-tracked by the destruction an enemy brings.

Your question: "Is it worth it?" would be answered very differently, depending on who you speak to. I would say it's only worth it if you get there without hurting people. If just one person got hurt on the way there, it's not worth it. If you have to hurt another fellow human (or even animal) to get to any place, it's just not worth it. There are ways to get to a place without being so mean to people. It's easy to be mean to someone who is keeping you from where YOU wanna be, but hard to help them on their way there. We're all living on the same planet and should respect each other enough to help out anyone who needs help. Not stealing from them or making sure they don't success in the field they wanna succeed in or anything negative like that.

Answer 4

Why live on others' expectations? It's your life. You live it.

*Cue It's My Life- Bon Jovi

Answer 5

"The mind of others is a wretched place to live." A quote by Arthur Schopenhauer, meaning, to regard people's opinions is akin to a self-inflicted misery. People have no place in directing your life-- they have none but predilection on the one hand, and scorn on the other. At any rate, you can work until you tire yourself to death, and you will still not satisfy people. And if you do not work, you will be shunned and mocked. From this, it should be obvious to you how worthless people are. Do what you find to be fulfilling in your life.

Life is comprised, mostly, of work, worry, and trouble.

I HIGHLY recommend you go to the links below, clear your mind, and just listen for 40 (total) minutes and I promise you WILL have the answer to your question.

This philosopher too was pressured by his father to be a merchant but instead chose a life of philosophy--and he came out winning.

Answer 6

To me, I believe in Life it is who we loved and who loved us and our relationship growing with God. I know that is all the success I need. Success is the lives you have touched in your life time. The dash in between the date born and the date died on a tombstone.

Answer 7

if you much cared about what people and society want you will turn to a machine you must know what you want what are your goals and try to achieve them related with your ability