To go or not to go: wedding or funeral...

Question

They both happen to fall upon the same day, unfortunately.

My friend passed away last Saturday from a motorcycle accident, but my cousin is getting married on the 2cnd, which is when the funeral is.

They guy that passed, I've known him since we were in elementary and we were good friends. And I'd like to show respect for his family by going, but I don't want a family member mad at me for not attending their special day...can you help me think of a compromise I could possibly reach? Or of not [I know this sounds wrong] which is more important?

I think they both kind of fall in the morning so I couldn't leave from one and go to the other...

Answer 1

Sorry for your loss...

You could go to the wake and/or removal of the funeral and go to the wedding?

Answer 2

i would say go to both. funerals are usually in the morning/early afternoon, so you should be able to go to both. i think your family will understand if you're a little late for the wedding because of a funeral.

Answer 3

Call the people getting married and tell them what happened. They should understand. If they don't then they aren't respecting you and you got respect from your friend. So pay your last respects to your friend.

Answer 4

I think your family will understand if you go to the funeral.

Answer 5

I'd go to the funeral and pay my respects, then move on to the wedding party after, if I could face partying after a funeral. I'd say the funeral's "more important" than the wedding, really, even if it feels a bit weird to compare the events to one another.

Answer 6

if it was me i would go to my friends funeral first  this will be the last time that you will see your friend your cousin will be around for many more years go pay your respects to his family and him then if it isnt to late then go to the wedding and if they dont understand you oh well

Answer 7

I think you should go to the funeral. It'll be the last time to say goodbye, but you can tell your cousin congratulations whenever you want. If you tell the bride and groom about why you are missing, I'm sure they'll understand, but it might be hard for your friend's family to understand why you'd go to a celebration rather their son's funeral.  I'm very sorry for your loss.  

Answer 8

Im sure there will probably be a wake the night before the funeral. Go to the wake, and pay respect to the family, and then the next day go to your cousins wedding.

Sorry for your loss =[

xoxo Jadee♥

Answer 9

go to the funeral. you can see photos from the wedding and your cousin will understand that you need to say goodbye to your friend. you really need to say goodbye to your friend especially if you have known him for so long. really it is better to say goodbye, it's the last chance you'll get  

Answer 10

Your family should understand the situation. You will be able to see your cousin again sooner or later, but this is your last chance to pay respect to your friend.

My sincerest thoughts are with you for your loss.

Answer 11

I would go to the funeral. This is the last time for goodbyes. You can see your cousin anytime.

Would it be possible for you to attend the wedding for the ceremony and then the funeral for the final goodbyes or do they fall on the same time lines?

I'm sorry for your loss. I hope you can figure something out!

Answer 12

A wedding is an all day and night party and a funeral is more of a morning time...Id say to go to funeral 1st and then the night do of the wedding...The funeral needs more support than the wedding...To be honest the wedding party will only be interested in bride and groom and if ther decent they should understand that u need to pay ur respects...Thois is ur last chance to do so and im sure u wont be missed for a few hours.

Answer 13

funeral .. your cousin should understand

Answer 14

i would go to the funeral

Answer 15

Is there like a wake that happens before the funeral? If so you could go to that and probably still be able to make the wedding--or at least the reception. If you decide to just go to the funeral, your cousin should understand that you've experienced a loss and be okay with you saying your last goodbyes to your friend.

Sorry for your loss, and congrats to your cousin.  

Answer 16

go to the funeral.you can always apologize to your cousin and they will understand. the family and your friends will need you as support at the funeral, as im sure you will need them. you can always go to the reception after you go to the funeral and congraduate the bride and groom.  

Answer 17

the funeral sounds more important. you should go to the funeral in the morning, and then you should still be able to make the reception at night.

Answer 18

i would go to the funeral, if you were close to him then your family should understand why you want to go

his family would appreciate that you were there to say your finale goodbye to him

Answer 19

They're both once in a life time things... maybe if there is a wake or an open casket the day before you can go to that and then you can go to the wedding the next day...

Sorry about your loss...