To people who are loners....?

Question

I would like to hear your life stories. Have you ever been that way or did you become that way because of life circumstances?

Answer 1

Yes people make things way complicated and emotionally hard.  I came from a very chaotic and inconsistent childhood.  I find attending to people can be very draining.  I vassilate between being a loner and being a social butterfly.  Often just interacting with people at work and my spouse is enough to sustain my social urges.  I have also found that it takes a good month of not interacting with people before I get 'lonely'.

Answer 2

I was born that way. I'm told even when I was in Kindergarten (Pre-school) that I did not care for the other children and kept my distance. I have always preferred solitude to the company of others. I think my life experiences have merely reinforced that attitude not created it.

Answer 3

I am not a loner, but a side of me is. And I was simply born with it. At certain times (and I can't pin down the reason), I just feel that to be around other people would be too much of a hassle. I even turn down hanging out with friends, or doing an activity I really love because the interaction, at the moment, just seems so totally ... draining.

I feel like a lot of this has to do with pleasing people: even around people I'm totally comfortable with, I still have to hold a conversation appropriately, still have to work to connect, entertain, and react.

These are easy human functions, and things I usually excel at in my "people-person" mode...But I guess my level of willing involvement just goes wayy up and wayyy down, too.

Answer 4

become that way because of life circumstances

Answer 5

I work with an enormous amount of people at my job. I am very curious about people. I study people. But when work is over, I like to keep company with my dogs. I lost a loved one that I enjoyed keeping company with and they have helped fill the gap.

Answer 6

I think I become a loner because of life circumstances.

My family is not very well off. So I need to work at my family's little shop after school.

I never hang out with classmate or go for a date because I don't have the time and my allowance is too little. My classmate like to make fun of me because I am poor. Girls avoid me because I am poorly dress.

My parent are very negative people, who never praise or compliment me for anything that I have done well. My parent like some of the bullies in school, always said negative things about me. This give me a low self-esteem and low self-confidence.

My life only start turn around after my 3 years in the army ( national duty ) . I gain more self-confidence and self-esteem and start to believe in myself. However, I still don't like to hang out with others because I don't smoke or drink. All my friends in army smoke and drink.

After my life in the army, I went to work and study part-time and get my degree in computer science. I also don't have the time to hang out with others. I have heavy workload at the company and in the evening, I need to study like h**l for my exam.

I am very comfortable to be alone. I feel very stressed in crowd places.

Answer 7

I wasn't born that way, as a child i was the most social kid all up to junior high. I became a recluse because of family issues and other life circumstances.

Family issues during high school such as coming close to extreme poverty and i just couldn't tell or show my friends how i lived in a 1 bedroom apartment with 5people(my family) Also moved to homes that were unsanitary full of molds. I escaped that reality through computer games which further lowered my social skills with people.

As a kid every time i would make a mistake i would get beat up by my parent and from there i became deathly afraid to make mistakes and so i kept playing it safe and it made me more shy as well even now.

Other life events had caused me being a loner. I am working towards going back to being a social person but it is hard as my social skills aren't very well developed.

Answer 8

when other people are brought into the picture, things somtimes can become more complicated, too much to worry about. i prefer to keep to myself most of the time it makes things more simpler when its jsut you and your thoughts. (although i do have acouple close friends i talk to)