Too early to have a baby?

Question

I am 20, my husband is 22 and we have been married 9 months. We both feel very strongly that we should start our family but I worry that it will be too soon and the comments I will face from others that are negative I will not be able to handle. I would like to stay home with my baby and my husband and I could make it work but neither of us has a degree yet. Any suggestions? I want to be a mom so badly and I don't know if I should wait or not.

Answer 1

I wouldnt worry or care what other people say about it. Its your life and its totally up to you. Im 22 and i have an 8 month old son. If you plan on being a stay at home mom then dont worry about a degree. Maybe your husband could get one while youre trying and/or pregnant it would help a great deal. I want to stay home with our son when my mat leave is up so bad but there is no way we could afford it. It would help to have a little money before having a baby. Theyre expensive :P but theyre definetely worth it.  

Answer 2

Go to college and have a little fun first.  finish your degree and get yourself settled and then worry about the little ones. I found out i was having my first kid a month after i graduated high school and i never got a chance to even go to college.  I finally met my husband and we settled down- i decided to try to go to college at the age of 23 and 2 semesters in i found out i was pregnant again. I dropped out because juggling everything would've been too much for me and i haven't gone back since.  I am now looking for a new job and most good jobs want at least an associates.  take care of yourself now so you can better take care of your babies when the time comes..  hope this helps-- good luck

Answer 3

If you feel the need to ask that question, that should offer you some direction. There are obviously doubts in your own mind. Twenty is extremely young to be having children. No one ever likes to hear this, but where your life will be in 10 years is so far from where you think it will be, or want it to be, that it might as well be someone else's future. Please, please wait. You're way too young!

Answer 4

I know you've probably heard this song and dance before, but babies are a HUGE responsibility both time wise & financially.  If you're worried about what other people say or think about you then you're definitely too young to have a baby, further more what would it hurt to get your degrees first?  I'm sure you would make a great mom, but part of being a great mom is to be able to provide for your child.  You never know what life is going to hold for you, if you have a degree to fall back on to help you support your baby you'd be much happier in the long haul.  No one gets married with the intent of growing apart as you mature but it does happen.  Hold your horses honey and do the right thing for you and your child.

Answer 5

Well I am not married and have a 17 month old and one due in two days, and i am 23. You shouldn't worry about what other people think. With pregnancy and babies its a happy time and your family and friends will be excited and happy for you. it all depends on whether you think you are actually ready or not also. if you are debating this much on it then you might not be all that ready. wait a little bit longer just to make sure you are both ready. but if you both do feel like you are ready is your desicion not any one elses.

Answer 6

If you feel strongly enough to become a mum & your husband wants to be a dad then why not. I am 21 & my boyfriend is 26, we've been together over 3 years now. 7 weeks ago we decided it was time for us to try for a baby as we both want to be parents. Now here I am 5 weeks pregnant. Some people catch on quick others don't. i think you should go for it. Both our families are happy for us. Its your choice at the end of the day.

Good Luck x

Answer 7

Well you have to decide that with your husband. I will just share what I did. I married my husband we were 20 and 24. We had our son at 22 and 26.. my husband had a Bachelors degree and I was working on getting mine and ended up going to school for the last two years which means I had a baby, school, housework, etc and it has been VERY HARD. You can have babies for a LOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNG time. If I could do it all over again I would have waited until school was done. If your husband still has college to go just think about how hard it will be on your relationship when he has to do all four.. support the family and go to school and be a father & husband.  

Answer 8

wait a while, maybe 6 months to a year. finish you education and save a little money, and make sure your in a stable situation then have the baby. i don't think you too young though, as long as your married and can afford to have child it's fine. and if people give bad comments don't listen, they're probably jealous. hope i helped and good luck! =)

Answer 9

My husband and I ran off and got married so quickly everyone thought I was pregnant. When our 9 month mark hit and still no baby everyone was so relieved. lol. That is when we decided to try. We tried for years and finally got pregnant last year. We had our baby in march and quite unexpectedly, I got pregnant agin in july. lol. It may take longer than you anticipate. Start trying now and who knows? Maybe by the time you get pregnant, you both will nearly have a degree.  

Answer 10

I am in the same boat as you. Same ages too. I want a baby so badly. Its your body, your life, and you have control over it. Other people may have opinions, but once they realize that you are serious and can handle it, they will shut up. I dont think you should wait. I am trying to concieve myself, my husband is still in college and I will be staying home too. If you feel in your heart that you are ready and accept the responsibilities then nobody should keep you from that decision. Its your life. Plus, we're at the age where we can be the cool moms and you can concieve faster because your eggs are at their prime.  

Answer 11

I honestly will suggest you to get a career first, maybe a short one and get a full time job to save money so by the time you decide to become a mom you will be prepared with some save money and maybe a part-time job. You can get a small career there are some that you can get in 6 to 9 moths.But is for any reason you have talked about this and become pregnant any time soon then, I will suggest you more less the same save and study while being pregnant if you don't get to finish continue studying, but it might be a little harder but not impossible. I was wiling to do the same I got married by 18 and continue with college then got pregnant had my baby and rest for 6 months then went back to college but had to quit because I was getting a divorce so I had to work, because my EX took all my save money and didn't have any left. SO after almost 7 yrs I returned this past Summer to college but know I have a loving, caring hubby, 3 kids & enough money save just in case,plus my hubby has a good job. BUt still I am looking forward to finish what I start, so I can show my kids that anything is possible and hopefully in 2 yrs I will be an educator. SO My best suggestion will be to plan ahead and talk about if before getting pregnant that way you can enjoy your baby plus having a good job too. SO what ever you as COUPLE decide make it a good decision and BEST WISHES!!!!

Answer 12

Hmmm... I see those Motherly instincts are kicking in! you are not too young, in my opinion just right! my mother had me when she was 22, and she did not have a degree either. She and my dad switched taking care of the children, which was me, and my two brothers, while my mom took classes at the Community College, and it worked out just fine! My dad was a Part Time Contractor, and While he Worked During the Day, my mom stayed home and watched us kids. Then at night, my dad took care of us while my mom went to School. That wasn't the Routine every night, just 3 nights a week, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday.so i saw both my parents 4 days a week. they are very Successful, thirteen Years later, my mom stays at home full time, and helps my dad with his contracting business which is now full-time. We live in a big home, and are very happy! so my advice to you is to ask yourself "Am I ready for a Baby? can i give up things in order to care for it? if the answers are yes, I say go for it!

Answer 13

I will keep it simple and to the point:

I am 23, I have 2 young children, I love my children very much but I urge you to wait. Get good jobs, get savings in the bank *at least 10,000* saved up, grow a little enjoy what you have because you don't have it anymore when you have children, or at least not as much (I'm not talking about s*x). Its hard and rewarding at the same time but all the same very difficult at a young age, enjoy your relationship for a while give yourself a few years maybe 2-3 make sure its going to work and that you enjoy each other and the things you can do together that you can't with children. Mostly make sure you have careers babies are expensive.