Trouble with parents! just wana b a teen! plz help?

Question

ok im gona be 16 soon and i still get treated like a child im the oldest from 3 kids. well all my friends my age could go out to partys with their friends and stuff, i want to do the same too, i mean i want my mom and dad to trust me enough to let me go, i havent done anything so they cant trust me anymore, i havent ditched or had s*x wit my boyfriend, im very responsible, and it hurts cuz it seems like they dont trust me! i dont wana b one of those grls who runs away from home bcuz there parents keep them trap, but how things are i think im heading that way! if i do go out i have to take my lil sis shes 13 and if i tell my dad a guy is cumin he wont let me go, i dont kno wat to do anymore i cant take this. is like my mom understands it but wont do nothin abt it cuz she doesnt want to disagree with my dad! every1 grl from my family who is 14 and older gets to go out and i cant.most of my friends dont have dads and mayb that why they have more freedom but im stuk wit two parents, ive tried talkin to them and askin them what they did at my age they just stay quiet, plz help idk wat to do anymore!

Answer 1

If you want to be treated like an adult, then you have to act like one, and that includes expressing yourself like one.  Take a look at your post - this problem is supposedly important to you, but you didn't take the time to use coherent spelling and grammar so that your listener could really understand you.  You need to think about what your parents hear, not just what you mean to say.

What your parents or your sister or anybody else did at your age is irrelevant - they lived in different times and were different people.  Focus the conversation on what is appropriate for YOU, here and now.

Tell your parents that you really want to show respect for their rules and address their concerns, but that you can't prove your trustworthiness or learn to deal with difficult situations unless they take a chance on trusting you.  Ask them to work *with* you to develop fair compromises - for example, you can attend a party if they know the hostess, if the parents will be home, and if you call when you arrive and when you leave.  Ask them what potential situations frighten them (drinking, s*x, peer pressure), and ask them to roleplay with you so you can demonstrate appropriate responses.  Suggest that you have a reliable friend or cousin chaperone you.  

Answer 2

Oh yeah I'm fourteen and my dad thought I was too young to hang out with my boyfriend and friend and her boyfriend just in their living room, I got my mom to make him though. They're probably trying to prevent you from what they did then, but do things that show you're responsible. It works.

Answer 3

I think you should just explain to them how you feel.

Everything that you wrote here.

Your still there little girl so its hard.

But they will have to understand that this is best for you.

Answer 4

Your words, "most of my friends don't have dads and maybe that why they have more freedom but I'm stuck with two parents,"

Stuck with two parents!!!  You should be happy that you still have two parents that are raising you.  Most kids would kill to have their parents still living in the same house with them.  Your parents are only doing what they think is right.  Today's world is so much worse than when your parents and I were your age.  Although it may be hard to see this as a 16 year old please understand where they are coming from.

My advice is to ask for little things that allow some time to yourself.  Instead of five hours at a party ask if you can go for an hour or two and stick to it.  Tell him you want to earn his trust and eventually it will get easier.  You mentioned that you were the oldest and I know how that feels.  I too was the oldest of five siblings and I tell them how I paved the way for them.  It wasn't easy for me but by the time it was their turn it was cake for them.  They so got away with murder!  But that is the downfall of being the oldest sibling.  Now I am a 36 year old married mother of two.  My daughters are 11 and 13 and I am very strict with them, too.  Believe me I understand where you are coming from and it will get better.  Your parents have done a good job raising you and you will appreciate this more when you have kids of your own.  Trust me :0)

Hope this helps :0)

Answer 5

Nothing that's said here will change your parents mind unfortunately but speaking from experience, I allowed my daughter to go out with friends when she was 14.  I received many gray hairs but she was good, didn't do anything bad.  I did once have to physically keep her from leaving but this was to help out a friend who was going to be ganged up on and I didn't want my daughter involved, I called the police and all was averted.  She proved to me she was responsible. No drugs, alcohol or boyfriends until she was 19.  Considering the freedom she had I think she did pretty good!  She's a very independent girl now at 22, moved away and has a good job.

Answer 6

They just like you too much,, too much that they cant imagine one day the will leave you..

Mine please

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 7

well your parents just love you and want you to be safe. a girl i work with is latina, like yourself, and when she was young her parents were the same way, they never let her do anything. but then she finally rebelled, and boy did that wake her parents up. but if you just leave you'll upset them more and they'll never trust you. see your dad being a guy, knows how guys can be and most guys just want s*x. i'm sorry but that's a fact girl. Just keep trying, talk to your dad and tell him you will make the right choices if he lets you go out. i mean how will he know if he does'nt let you out once in a while. Good Luck!! keep trying  to convince your parents!!

Answer 8

they trust you they just don't want you to grow up. it happens with everyone

Answer 9

Hon, your fifteen no "Nearly sixteen" and your parents have "a responsibility of care" for you, your safety is Paramount in their mind, you must remember that! girls that are young in their teens are not streetwise like their older cousins the "20 somethings" you are much more trusting of people than you should be. Your parents are well aware of this because they are more mature and wiser than you plus they've" been there and done that!" years before you even knew about the street and club scene's and when you are married and have children you will remember these times and reflect on them when your children complain to you about not allowing them to go out with their friends. Have a great day!

Answer 10

my dad is the same . but they really are just keeping you safe. they dont want you to go out & have s*x then get hurt. your there pride & joy and it hurts them to see you hurt. just try to show your old enough. im not aloud to go to parties either. but parties get shot up, cops come, people get high  & drunk , people have s*x... ect. why not just get a group of friends ver at your house & hang out. have a mini party=]

Answer 11

i think you should talk to them

if your scared than write it in a letter and give it to them

i wrote a lettter and it worked and now i have more freedom

Answer 12

this happens to everyone, im 18 and my mom is still down my back about everything i do. if i go out some where she calls the phone 24/7....sometimes i get so sick of it i have to turn it off lol. everything takes time even though we want things to hurry up. just try to have patients.... good luck