Twin Toddler boy very attach to nanny. My gut tells me it's bad?

Question

Hi, I have twin boys. that are well over the age of two. They will be three in one month. We have had a nanny for 2 years she helps 5 days a week any where from 4 hours to 6 hours. For the last year we have had a nanny cam in every room of the house. I use to tape all the time . Now just when I'm not there . I started to Nanny cam because my gut was telling me different. I did not like how she favored one child. I gringed when I would see her play with him. There is just something about it. Two much kissing, two much restling. Every time I bring it up, I look absolutly jeolues and foolish. So I shut my mouth. Tonight I was changing his diaper and he had stuck his finger in his r****m.I said is that what Mary dose to you, he reply yes. Very calm I said oh. show me again. He did. How do I cautch her now. I feel so alone. My husband thinks I'm over board. I know I am not. I have caught him playing w/f***s. I read it's a symptom of sexual abusie. What kind of counseling to I seek for him

Answer 1

OH MY GOODNESS! GO TO THE POLICE NOW! DO NOT LEAVE THIS WOMAN ALONE WITH YOUR CHILDREN AGAIN! YOUR GUT INSTINCT IS USUALLY BETTER THAN ANYTHING ELSE! THE POLICE WILL LEAD YOU TO THE RIGHT PEOPLE FOR HELP. I CRY FOR YOU. MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU BECAUSE I CANNOT IMAGINE ANYONE DOING THIS TO MY LITTLE BOY WHO IS THE SAME AGE AS YOURS. I PRAY HE WILL NOT REMEMBER THIS IN HIS FUTURE. GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS YOU. PLEASE TAKE IMMEDIATE ACTION AGAINST THIS NANNY!

Answer 2

My child played with f***s also.  So much so that I had to duct tape his diaper.  He was never sexually abused.  No one other than mom and dad put their hands on him to change a diaper or bathe.    At this age if you feel like he is being sexually abused then you change nannies.  No ands, ifs, buts about it.

Answer 3

Mary has already been caught in some way.....IF your boy is telling you thats what happened to him and by whom then what are you waiting for....till he falls outa some window.I quess you should have fired her arsh when you knew about him playing with his stool..... this aint any etiquette where you are paying her for.Luckily she just picked 1 of your boys or so to speak.Your hubby should take your and your kids side.....Its always better to chose a nanny from a well-known agency or somebody who has been recommanded mouth to mouth....so never make this mistake twice i mean get a nice nanny this time or just try to be a f/t mum yourself....your twins deserve better and need you

Answer 4

Don't sack the nanny, but don't leave her alone with your children either, because if u sack her she might suspect something and run. When changing your sons diaper again, do it in front of your husband, so he will see when your son does it. Then, go to the police and play with your son or change his diaper calmly and he might do it again and ask him the same question and the police might hear the reply and that will be a good start. Show them the video recordings and how close she was to him and how it looks too close for just a nanny. Hopefully, the police might take it from there, but remember to not sack the nanny no matter how angry until the police have seen her because she might only run away and do it to someone elses kid or come back some years on and start stalking you or something. The police might be able to seek appropriate counselling for both your sons because even if she favoured one she may have been doin other things to your other son too.

Answer 5

first call the police and charge with child abuse then fire her and the police will aid you in a victim  assistance and will help you find a counselor who is specially trained to deal with young children and do it as soon as possible before she hurts your little boy more good luck to you and your son  my prayers are with you

Answer 6

If you want to find out if this is in deed happening and you want to prove that there is abuse and prosecute, then you need to turn your nanny cams back on.  Watch them very carefully.  Lots of kids play with their body waste.  It's a natural course of learning about their bodies and how they work.  Even though your child answered yes...he may not really understand what you mean...he may just be relating his bottom to the nanny using baby wipes to clean him.  Before you can accuse her of abuse you need to have proof.  To put your mind at ease you can always let her go and find yourself a new nanny.  The best way would be through a reputable nanny agency where back ground checks are done.

Answer 7

Your gut is the way to go, always trust your feelings.

You need to turn your nanny cams back on, catch her at it, and then confront her. Be sure in the mean time to give your boys lots of love and reassurance.