Um...is she my girlfriend? lol?

Question

ok. this is gonna sound stupid. but i hav no idea if this girl is my girlfriend or not. and i know the easiest answer is just ask her. but i dont want to ruin what we hav. and if she says we arent then ill be devo'd :( and i dont want her to be like "i TOLD u we are just friends"

ok well. about 4 weeks ago we confessed we like each other. we liked each other for 7 months before telling.

well she made the first move by turning up at my house and kissed me. but then went on to say later that she didnt want a relationship and was to messed up to committ and that she wasnt g*y and we should just stay friends.

well ok i thought we are just friends. but ever since that night ive spent the last 3 weekends at her house. and by weekends i mean friday afternoon till monday morning. and when im not there we spend hours on the phone together every night. and we text all day.

SHES kissed me about 5 more times. we've gone further but not much coz of "lady friends" the first 2 weeks. and we've both been really sick the last 2 if it wasnt for that we 100% would of slept together..

she texts me to say goodmorning. she rings to see how i am and how my day was. she hugs me when she sees me.

im just confused as to what is going on here? it seems like a relationship.

whats ur opinion?

Answer 1

if she said she doesnt want a relationship then most likely it isnt. If you want to know just ask her again if she would be interested in being in a relationship with you, if she says no again, then youll know for sure

Answer 2

shez 28 eh?.. and u said that she has always been with guys?..

well at this age.. i guess she is kinda desperate.. and since she does not have any guy in her life.. she is kinda pretending to be in a relation with u..

also, i dont think she wants to be called a L*****n.. and so she is not completely commiting to you..  

Answer 3

Your in h.s with a friend in 2008. That's about it.

but seriously, why do you need to put a name on it? Shes obviously not comfortable putting as name on it so just roll with it and if she "cheats" call her out.

Answer 4

to guard your heart, take her at her word when she says that she doesn't want to be in a relationship. of course, she could change her mind...  but, never forget what she said.

maybe she wants something to happen with you, but the whole 'relationship' thing scares her.  so, don't press it.  just see what happens. so far, it looks like it's going very well.

Answer 5

To me it sounds it but I'm not too sure the mind is a crazy thing and to you it might seem something totally diff to the way she sees it. I think you should just ask her there is no harm in asking.  

Answer 6

honestly.. i haven't read your entire question, but why don't u ride it out a little longer... don't worry about labeling what you have just yet..if people ask.. u can just say that she is just a very special person that you enjoy spending time with... so many people are in a rush to stick on the girlfriend/or boyfriend labels...and its guna hurt 10x more ripping that label off if you just assume, without talking to her about it..if she doesn't feel the same....COMMUNICATION is key.. but you shouldn't rush into say.." so are you my girlfriend" cause, lets be honest..sounds kinda lame, in an elementary school kind of way..good luck... and don't think to much into it yet.. just enjoy what you have without the labels :)

Answer 7

She is clearly giving you mixed signals... But it sounds to me like she is denying her homosexuality... Ask her out on a REAL DATE, i bet you any money she will say yes.

Answer 8

shes probablee confused/in denial about her orientation. try taking her on a proper date, talking to her about love an sexuality, an be there for her an very loving, maybe u cud get her a braclet or somthin so she knows ur serious. u cud also ask her officallee to be ur girlfriend. if ur having s*x i dunt thenk its too soon to ask that ♥  

Answer 9

She's definitely very confused about where she is in her life & trying to figure out her sexuality.  I wouldn't call it a relationship, but rather keep things how they are and let them happen as they may.  But be prepared for her to freak out about "not being g*y" as you may get yourself hurt that way.  Good luck & I hope it works out for you.

Answer 10

Next time you're being intimate and loving in bed together, whilst you're kissing, say to her "should I take it that we're girlfriends?". When you're in that "mood" it's more likely she won't get cross and say something like "we're just friends!!". She will most likely open up her heart to you and even if she says "no, I just want to be friends" she's unlikely to get mad.

Just quickly though, are you sure you want to be just friends with her? It could be like she's using you for s*x etc and nothing more. Decide whether you would be Ok sleeping with her but just being friends.  

Answer 11

In my experience in the world of lesbians, she aint your girlfriend unless its spelled out!

Doesnt mean your not seeing each other but dont expect a commitment unless you have been promised one.

It does sound like she is pretty confused right now. If your having fun, ride it out and see where it goes.

Answer 12

lady friedns xD

ur not the one who's confused...she is