Unfriendly Competition Ruining Friendship?

Question

My bff & I came from difft backgrounds. She felt I was a bar she had to measure up to.We met at the com. coll. I continued my education while she worked. I teach. She works in an office. She looked down on me like all teachers were starving. 1 day, my son asked her for $1. She said " I knew teachers were underpaid" On his b-day, she gave him a card that read "This card is much like a career in teaching, there's little money in it." Now, she now realizes I make $20,000 more than her. My son & I are living carefree and she & her child are living hand to mouth.

Yes, friends hv things in common. BUT, she did not do taxes, advanced degrees, 2 cars, vacation, buy land, remodel, become a notary, until I did.

Then, she asked "how can I get summers off w/o working with kids?" Now, she is trying to switch to teaching --THE SAME SUBJECT AS MINE! She has no methodology training & has not subbed or at least been an aide.

Should I help her after the putdowns?

Will she finally be at peace?

Answer 1

She sounds like a greedy, self-important, incessantly callous person. I wouldn’t waste my time with someone like this; the most important thing to these kinds of people is money and medals. Why bother; people like that never change they have only one great lust in life, it’s usually one that has no real importance.

We are all something, but none of us are everything.

Answer 2

You could help her, and then watch what she does.

If she continues to seem interested only in the financial aspects of teaching, rather than the career side of things, she may simply be a very superficial person who has been using you to some extent.

Or, she could blossom when she finishes her training and become a dedicated teacher, a more personally satisfied person and a better friend.

I don't see how helping her can hurt you, the boot is all on her foot to lift herself up.

Cheers :-)

Answer 3

Obviously she looks up to you. Maybe she didn't see the comments she made as insulting, maybe she just thought it was a joke.

I have friends that make comments like that, like I'm better than you in such and such way. They are usually jealous of something else that you have.

If you still consider her as your friend, you should help her. If she says any more sarcastic comments you can always point out that she wouldn't be where she is without you.

Answer 4

She sounds creepy. Personally I would distance myself.

         But you could give her some reading material I guess.

   All in all she is a few fries short of a happy meal....

Answer 5

I sure the h**l hope you weren't teaching English.

You're both better off moving on.

ETA: oh, so you can write coherently.  Excellent.  

My statement was "you are both better off" and is correct as written.

Answer 6

I hate how teachers always act like there under payed. When they make a fair wage. An no I always wonder why women would have a friend that they don't like. Men would stifle that as soon as we got annoyed with it. An never let it escalate to a point of losing a friend.

Answer 7

I wouldnt waste my time, but its really only entirely a descision you can make.