Unmarried and Pregnant by a soldier!!!HELP!!!?

Question

I am 6 months pregnant with twins by a soldier and he will be leaving to Iraq in a few months. I have no job, apartment or daycare. What do I do about the birth certificate because he will be gone when I give birth. I'm not married so what kind of benefits am I eligible for? Does his rank and time in the Army matter? He is currently in the reserves..does this impact anything? Can he opt out of going to Iraq to witness the birth of his children? I need help because I am unclear on everything and by the looks of it what he says appears to be many LIES!!!!!! Please help me!!!

Answer 1

What do I do about the birth certificate because he will be gone when I give birth. - You complete the form and submit it just like you would do if the was there.

I'm not married so what kind of benefits am I eligible for? - You are not eligible for any, you are not married to him. You children will be eligible for dependent benefits.

Does his rank and time in the Army matter? - Not for this discussion

He is currently in the reserves..does this impact anything? - Yes, once he comes off of active duty, benefits end.

Can he opt out of going to Iraq to witness the birth of his children? - No.

Answer 2

as far as the military is concerned you are entitled to NO benefits whatsoever.  once the kids are born they will be covered by Medical insurance.. but the military may require a paternity test. That YOU have to pay for.   and that coverage ends when the deployment is over since he is Reserves.    you will also need a court order establishing child support before the military will give him BAH.  

millions of women have given birth while their partners were deployed.  since you do NOT exist as far as the military is concerned no, he cannot 'opt out' even if you were married he wouldn't be permitted to.  

as for getting his name on the BC..that's strictly up to State law.  

Answer 3

Sorry to say this, but your children will be covered under him..

You won't.

His rank/time does not afford him any special privileges in this area. I know many troops who have had to serve in deployed areas while their children were being born. He can't come home just for that. and he can't opt out of going to Iraq. Sorry.

I would talk to him about marriage quick. Otherwise you'll be left out in the cold on this one.

P.S. I don't mean to be harsh, just that I can;t sugarcoat anything for you lest you misinterpret something and end up with no other options when the situations arise.

Answer 4

I concur with David,

File the birth certificate like you would anything else.  You are not eligible for any benefits as you are not married.  Now, if they are truly his kids and you have a paternity test he would be able to put the kids on DEERS underneath him.  Then the kids would be covered medical.  His rank and time in the Army have nothing to do with anything.  Being in the reserves also has no impact on anything.  No, he can't opt out of going to Iraq... I had quite a few of my guys miss births etc., and it don't matter.  My unit actually tried to stop one of my guys from going to the states from Iraq while his baby daughter was terminal.  

Answer 5

They are right. Army takes care of army, you as a girlfriend are not Army. Sorry, I know that is not what you wanted to hear. You get no benefits, no insurance and no he can't opt out. If you are really committed, my advice get married. Then you get insurance, and he gets more money. His rank and time will only affect his pay not anything else, though he does get more money for being in combat.

As far as I know..once is home you still get tricare as long as he stays in the reserves, at least that is how it works for the guard. It is a veteran benefit.

I have been an Army wife for 5 years and 2 tours to Iraq.

Answer 6

Since you are not married to him, you have no rights to anything Army. Which sucks, cause Im a Army Girlfriend, and I think we have to deal with things harder. But yeah, as long as your not married, you have no rights to anything he has, and since you aren't married, they aren't going to let him leave or take time to see you. Sorry hun. Botton line, you will either have to talk to him and marry him for you get benefits or you need to leave him and find help else where. Good luck to you sweetie. Just remember, your children will be more important then any guy =)

Answer 7

As a gf you will be eligible for nothing, the only time you will get medical, dental, etc.. is if you are married.  The child will be eligible for medical, dental and so forth once it is born but the military may require a paternity test before the benefits start.  His rank/time counts as nothing.  If he is going to Iraq he cannot get out of it because of a child being born, lots of children are born each day and year while the spouses are deployed.