Unruly kids? Plz help!?

Question

Lately i feel like my kids do not listen at all. they are 5,6, 7, and 8 and I'm 17 wks pregnant. I have to say everything 3 and 4 times before they do it and usually they tell me no, they fight with each other, scream and yell, and talk back to me all the time,,,, they are constantly in time out, we don't spank,,,,this all just leaves me frustrated and angry at the end of the day and i take it out on my hubby. i feel awful, i dread getting up in the morning. my mom says its just the end of summer, and it will get better when school starts, but i dont know about that. I have even picked up a part time job 2 nights a week and all day saturday just to not be in the house!

Our kids have no real chores or responsibilities to earn privileges, as we thought they were to young, but i think i just spoiled them.

I would appreciate any suggestions anyone has as to house rules, chores, behavior rewards... well anything really... i feel very upset and somewhat helpless with them, its gotten to the point we are embarrassed to take them out in public cuz they are just wild.. my hubby compares them to kids on one of those nanny 911 shows!

oh and this all started over the summer....especially since we announced we are having a new baby.

thanks in advance for any help.

Answer 1

I will not profess to be an expert, but it sounds like they need boundaries, structure, and a little routine. At 17wks pregnant you are undoubtedly tired, but you CANNOT let them talk to you this way.  It won't fix overnight (sorry), but a little consistency will go a long way.

They are testing their boundaries...

Figure out age appropriate responsibilites, track and reward.  Kids like to see results :)  Take away the privileges they love the most when they misbehave and disrespect (and follow through!) it'll be tough, but it will get their attention.

This thing they call parenting isn't for wimps - I would wish you all the best in taking control before the new baby, or you could quite possibly lose your marbles!

Answer 2

Try giving them chores to do give them each on thing to do each day. Make sure they know how much you appreciate their help.

Answer 3

Well if he compares it to Nanny 9-1-1 shows, then get the Nanny 9-1-1 books! She really does have a lot of fantastic information, and it works so well with younger kids!

It will take some time to get used to the methods though, because they can be quite tiring, especially when the kids don't want to listen. Maybe you could try spending some quality time with your children, doing activities like drawing or painting pictures or some sort of art project. They may just feel like the baby is going to take over their lives and that you are going to ignore them now, and so they started acting up for attention.

It is normal for children of that age to argue and fight, because they are all trying to look for independence and want their own way. Encourage them to use other methods, such as coming to you and saying "Mom, I'm getting frustrated because _____"

Good luck!