Vacation: my mom has taken my 11 yr old sister on 4 of them, i have never gone..

Question

i've never been anywhere with my mom outside of the province we live in, and right now my sister and my mom are on their 4th vacation out-of-province together... it's starting to get annoying and i'm really confused... any help to deal with it would be much appreciated, thanks!

Answer 1

honestly ask your mom if you can go..that you want to go..

many times our family needed someone to stay home with elderly grandparent so one or two of us would stay and the others would go on fab trips...swtching off...also a budgetary constraint played on the trips...finally though able to afford triler for gram and the a bigger truck and everyone went...happy happy joi joi

Answer 2

I suggest talk to your mother and tell her how you feel.

Communication is key.

Maybe she assumes you cannot take off work or whatever the reason be, just have a talk with her. Things will work out I'm sure.

Good Luck

Answer 3

why don't you talk to your mom about it tell her it finally your turn

Answer 4

your mom is a twit...

the LAST Thing Any parent should want is for their child to be reaching out on the internet for parental attention or parental advice!

UPDATE:  ohhhhh, your 19, & your sister is 11.... Stop acting like a 13 year old. Your on your own as you have said so go " vacation out-of-province" on your own or with friends.

Answer 5

Have you told your mom this?  I don't know how old you are (if you are an adult yet).  Maybe, assuming you don't live with them, she figures you are doing your own thing and doesn't realize you want to go with them.

Without other details, it's kind of hard to help you.

Answer 6

Have you ever asked why?

Perhaps your mom thinks that you're old enough to take care of yourself and your sister isn't...

The only way you'll ever find out though is if you ask...

Answer 7

How old are you? Maybe your mom thinks you wouldn't want to go. Have you asked? Is there more details to the story?

Answer 8

You should go on your own vacation for the rest of your life and send her hate post cards from around the world

Answer 9

I have taken my 17 and 23 year old on many vacations in their lifetime but my 19 year old has always been in trouble with the law and I have spent alot of money on lawyers and courtrooms, so I have explained to him that I cannot give him a reward until he straightens his act. I took him to one major vacation which he had a great time, but had difficulty n the airplane. I do take him on many mini excursions, but major vacations, no...that is something that is earned.  What is your mom's excuse. (Of course,I have always left him in reliable hands).

Answer 10

Oh brother. I am in that exact same situation. Well, mine may be a little different. My mom goes somewhere, and she DOESNT want to take my little brother (getting potty trained) or little sister (age 7) along with her. So she takes the next oldest, leaving me home to babysit. Does it suck? Shell yeah. But its understandable because the next oldest is, quite simply, an @ss hole a lot of the time and w/o mom home she would be WAY more trouble than help.

So my point is, check with your mom and think about it. Does she have a reason, does she even know you've been wanting to go? Ask her. BUt dont start yelling and crying 'its not fair'. Act the mature adult and just gather the info you want. Do what you will with it later, but try to impress mom with a good attitude first.

Answer 11

That sounds kind of mean.

Are you much younger or much older than your sister?

If you're much younger, then maybe she thinks you're too young to appreciate it.

If you're much older, then maybe she thinks you won't have any fun taking a trip with your mom and your little sis.

Your mom might think she has a perfectly good reason, and that you don't even mind, since you've never talked to her about it. That's why you need to let her know, so that you don't continue feeling bad about it.

I'm sure she just doesn't realize that she's making you feel bad. She has probably been thinking all along that you wouldn't even care. I bet she has no idea that you're feeling left out right now. That's why you're going to talk to her.

Just make sure that you do it in a mature way, so she will take you seriously.

Just talk to her. That's the best way to find out. Tell her that you're feeling a little down because you've noticed that she's leaving you out, and you don't know why. Ask her what her reason is.  Maybe she just thinks that you have your own things that you want to do, and that you won't want to leave them just to go and do stuff that your sister likes to do.

The only sure way to find out, is just to ask her. If she knows it's upsetting you, I'm sure  she'll include you next time :)

She laughed when you tried talking to her about it?

Wow! That sounds really mean. It's weird, since you have such a good relationship with her.  Maybe she didn't take you seriously, and she thinks you're just jealous.

Maybe she goes to do stuff that your little sis like to do, and she laughed because she thought it was silly that you'd want to go.

Maybe she thinks that since you're living on your own now, you should be going on trips with friends, and not with your mom and sis.

Also, do you think there could be a financial reason?

Do you think that maybe she has the money now, but she didn't have the money to take you when you were young?

She might also only have the money to take one person.

If you have money to pay your own way with, maybe you could let her know that if that's her reason, then you can afford it.

It's possible that she just can't afford to take two people, but it's also possible that she wants you to pay your own way, since you are grown up now and living on your own.

It could also be that your mom thinks you're just too old to go on a "family trip" since you are grown up and living on your own now.  

I'm sorry to ask, and this probably isn't the reason, but - is it your sis or your step sis? How is your relationship with your step-dad? Is it possible that he has something to do with it, if your sister is his real child? I hope that's not the reason, but I just wanted to throw it out there, just in case. So think about some of these things, and see what sounds right.

You could also just do it the easy way, and take your little sis out to lunch and ice cream. Sweeten her up, so she'll tell you what's going on. If you two don't have a great relationship because of your age difference, then maybe try to befriend her first. I wish you luck :)

For me;

My mom and I always did things together. We went shopping and took walks together and we spent time talking to one another on the phone..and everything. We had a tough time with my real dad, so we had to stick together  to feel alright. When she got remarried, it was such a huge change. Her husband just doesn't want to have anything to do with any of her kids, and he doesn't want her spending time with us either. His viewpoint is that we're grown up now, and we shouldn't need to spend time with our mom. I guess he was never close to his parents the way my mom and I are close, so he doesn't get it and he refuses to see.

My mom's husband doesn't want to go anywhere with her if her kids are there. He won't even come to family parties that my mom comes to, and he tries to talk her out of coming to them. He will only come if it's for her birthday, and he sits by himself if she has to leave the room, and he won't talk to anyone but her.

He just really doesn't want anything to do with my brothers and me. If she invites me on a trip with them and I go, he makes me feel like a third wheel, by pulling her to the side and making her stay behind until I walk ahead. He'll whisper his conversations to her and completely ignore me, and everything, so I don't bother going along anymore.

He doesn't seem to have anything against me as a person, but he doesn't want anything to do with me, since I'm not his family. He wants to have all of her time to himself, and doesn't want to share.

I let her know one day, that I have no desire to be a third wheel, and that if she's going to invite me and then he's going to make her ignore me the whole time, then I don't want to go along. Since then, she has stopped inviting me on their trips.  It's fine with me, since I know he doesn't want me with them anyway. He only wants to spend time with his own family, and even that is very rare.

I'm sure that's not the case with you, and I certainly hope it's not. Just in case, I wanted you to be aware of the possibility. If it turns out, then don't be hurt. Just know that he's selfish, and go do your own thing.

I left home at a young age, too. I was 13. I had to leave because of dangerous conditions with my real dad, but I always stayed close with my mom, no matter what.

We can lean on each other and we have a good relationship.

I really hope that wasn't the case with you, but if it is then know that you're not alone. Okay? I really hope things work out.

Answer 12

How old are you?  Do you still live at home?  Maybe when you were younger she could not afford it.  What about your dad?  You don't mention him.  If your parents are divorced maybe a court ordered her not to take you outside the province.  I'm sure there is more going on here and you should talk to your mom before you dwell on it any longer.

You left home at 16?  Isn't that kind of early?  I don't know anyone who left home that young when there were no problems.