Very Lonely and Sad...someone i just need advice?

Question

I'm a 15 year old, female. I've been feeling like this since May, especially in June, June was a BAD MONTH. and just yesterday I feel like enough is enough. The guy that I truly love and care is leaving thursday and i wont see him until next year in July. I am 99% sure my best friend and him like eachother. This really broke me maybe you think it's stupid but to watch the person you love, love someone else is one of the worst feelings ever. I, I've been trying to analyze what to do to feel better. This guy started out interested in me but my friend sort of got in my way and well, she is very outgoing,very flirty and i'm very shy so of course he also gave her attention. I love my best friend, she is like my sister but i have to admit she is not the best person ever. she can be really but really mean with people. I pray a lot, every time i wake up and before i go to bed. i pray to God to help me get through this, that this is just a phase and soon it'll all be over. that if i am like this, feeling very depressed it's because something great awaits for me. i have no one to talk to because i cant trust anyone and everyone i know is also friends with her too so i have most of this bottled up. i cry a lot, especially at night. i cant help it but feel very down all day. and at nigh i find it hard to sleep and when i can, the nightmare just continiues because i dream of him everyday and usully it's about him being with my best friend and they're going out and i am just there with a lost stare and i cant sleep !! not like i used to.......... please somone HELP ME. i need advice on how to handle this, how to move on with my life. i want to be the person i used to be, im ready to move on and be happy again..BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO! please, help me i need my life back.

Answer 1

I went through a absolutely horrible break up about three months ago and I have to say that what I needed and didn't get for a month was closure. Sounds to me as if you don't have any. Try calling him and asking him what he wants out of this and what's going on between him and your best friend. If he refuses to answer and won't talk to you, then there is your closure, he's done with you and, despite how harsh this may sound, you can't get him back, don't try, it's useless.

Now that's a harsh approach but probably very very true.

Here's how to feel better though:

First: Ice cream, I'm a guy and even I found this helpful (same thing with chocolate). I've heard somewhere that it's a chemical reaction in the brain or something but I can't find the source so that's not that credible.

Second: Friends. Go out with them, hang out with them, stay away from situations where you are alone. You want to take your closest friends (I would avoid your best friend because she'll make you think about the guy) and make them closer. Take you're casual friends and make them good friends. This will ultimately make you happier because you're having fun and you probably won't be thinking about him as much.

Third: Since he was the guy you loved and you truly loved and cared about him, I'm willing to bet you weren't looking at other guys while you were with him? Well, that needs to change. Look at guys and try and find someone to date. Putting yourself out there will help. It truly will.

There is no source about this, this is personal experience and personal experience only.

I hope you found this helpful, and I wish you the best of luck in any future love affairs.  

Answer 2

Google a short piece called Desiderata. It should help you a lot with the issues you have raised. You could also focus on strengths rather than weaknesses. For quality sleep you could try a natural herbal remedy called Valerian. It is available over the counter in herbalist shops. Once you get some quality sleep you should be able to work out a better direction. With very best wishes for a happier you. UK

Answer 3

Well I have learned that feelings go away. I feel sad too. Eventually, no matter how painful it feels, it will be better.

My girl broke up with me cuz of her old lover. I acted like I was ok with it but it hurt like a ___. But in a few days I felt better.. I think..

1:You will feel better in time.. hopefully.

2:You'll find something/someone.

Everybody feels sad sometimes. I run when I have things on my mind. After 6 miles I zone out. You'll be ok. Even if you don't know/feel it.

Answer 4

Every time you want to think about him, take your mind off him - better yet, pretend he's dead - sounds simple, but over time it works.