WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME ??

Question

am 17 .. and i have a boyfriend who i have been with for 8 months and i love him loads but i have problems i had a happy life in london loved every minute of it and then we had to move to spain and i sorta liked it but i didnt like the school so i went and lived with my nan she is a type who bugs you to eat and stuff like that but really nice but it didnt work out so i had to go to boarding school it was the 1st time i had lived on my own and i didnt get on with people to start with got left out made friends at school and then i found out they only was my frinds coz they wanted to get me in trouble and then i started eating on my own and after a while i got sad and hated the way i look im 5 foot and i always get the jokes but i live with it but then i started huting myself coz i was so down and the second year on boardin was the worst cut myself more and stoped eating for 10 days coz i phicially couldnt eat i missed my old life and my family who still lived in spain coz they didnt want to come back to england i still get up set alot and feel down my parants are coming back to live in england for 2 years but my dad has a split personality but its mild but im always gettin suicide thouts still i am happy with my boyfreind but if i ever loose him i have decided i will kill myself i want to every minute of the day but i think of him i wanna cut myself but i promised him i wouldnt but its so hard i feel fat i am 5 foot and weigh 8stone .8 and i hate it i wanna be thin and i wanna e happy but i cant be is there somethink wrong with me i would love to die i write poems and listen to music 24/7 coz i feel knowone understands and they dont

many thanks

bec xx

i want to be happy i really try but there is always something that brings me down and i just dont wanna feel like this anymore

plz dont think im a bad person its just how my life is going

Answer 1

You have acute lack of punctuation.

Answer 2

Hi, please understand, don't ever think about ending life, not eating causes hormone fluctuations that can make you think this way.

I can`t stress this enough, seek out a dietian from a gym or from the phone book, make an apointment and chat with them about your feelings and let them show you how to eat to avoid this. The best part about learning about nutrition is that you learn to cook better, meaning you get to eat deliciuos food while not gaining excess, so pickup some books.

Not even to mention any man will value this lol. The old saying has some merit "The way to a mans heart is through his stomach" Ha

You`ll soon realize negative thoughts were can be caused by eating improperly.  

After that, try to find a subject that you enjoy, something that you really think is cool. Writing poems, music etc... maybe a sport, maybe going to the gym, taking a course is always great (I luv exercising and then cooking delicious food). Taking personal interest courses is so good because we end up meeting people that are like ourselves at the course. Anyway the human mind seems to thrive from evolving or growing, in order to do that, that requires learning, daily, try it, try to learn one thing a day even its just a trival question. Read a good book on poetry and finish it, you`ll mysteriously feel good. If we don`t learn, we constantly circulate the the same info around the brain, this is frusterates the mind as its a learning machine that feeds from getting new information.

The best to you, take care.

Answer 3

I am pretty sure this is the wrong section but oh well...

You have a fmaily history of mental disorders. Nothing to be ashamed of. That tells me your chances of having the same or other disorder is 50%. If what you are saying is true, you have a disorder much like depression. What you need is PROFESSIONAL help. Yahoo answers is not where you will find it. Happiness is available, but not on the web. Sorry.

However, it is not far away. A phone call gets things going to a local doctor-even a medical doctor can help you find the avenue you need to right your ship.

I am sure your boyfiren is great, but you have to be solid before you can really appreciate a lasting relationship. If you are saying you will commit suicide if he leaves, that will increase the stress in your life and his, thus causing strain on the relationship.

Get help and do not be afraid of getting meds. Lots of great people take medications to balance themselves out.

Answer 4

It sounds like you're having a really tough time. Try talking things through with someone; your boyfriend, your parents, another member of your family. Don't suffer alone. It's good that you've at least told someone about it; self harm is not a good thing (I know, I've been there) and all you can do is find some other method of escape. I find reading helps a lot .. I've been having a pretty sh*t week and so I've started reading loads to try and get my mind off things.

All in all, it will get better, you just have to get through the bad stuff.

Answer 5

you have to blank it. this is life, ther are people  far worse than you, who try ther hardest to survive even though at any time or day they can be murded, bombed at or catch dangerous diseases... and you want to kill yourself because your 8 stone.... OMFGGGGGG

Answer 6

It sounds like you have a lot of things you are worried about.

It's good that you have an outlet in poetry and music. It's great to have something to turn to that can help you release some of those built up feelings.

If you aren't happy with your appearance, that's hard. But, just know that we all aren't in some way....I was always very thin when I was growing up and my friends made fun of me for that! So, I think we all want to be different than we are in some way. I would work on changing what you can control...and do your best to let go of what you can't...seems hard or impossible, but what can we do? We're all in the same boat in one way or another....even if we have different things we don't like about ourselves. We all don't like something.

If you are at all feeling suicidal, PLEASE talk to someone about it. You can even call an anonymous help line, like the Samaritans. Or talk to a school councilor or teacher, or friend or anyone! It's just important that you get help for something like that.

When we have change in our life, it's normal to feel overwhelmed. Moving to a different country and being separated from your family is pretty difficult. But, please don't base your happiness on other people though...like with your boyfriend, for example. Until you are ready and old enough to get married it's cool to just group date and have fun! You shouldn't worry about a boyfriend that much when you are 17! Trust me....I was 17 a few short years ago and now that I am happily married, I realize that most of the guys I dated were just preparing me to know what to look for...and NOT to look for when I found my husband. We dwell on our friends/boyfriends a lot as teenagers...but then we get older and grow up and realize none of it was as detrimental to life as we thought. Family/spousal relationships are most important. If we were able to realize that as teenagers more....it would be a lot simpler.

As someone in my mid-20's I'm young enough to remember what it was like when I was your age, but old enough to know there are things that will probably become important later, that you never realized you would care so much about. So, I hope you start looking forward to things like college and setting goals and planning what you want in life now. You should be looking forward to the things you will get to do in the near future. That may give you some hope and direction....if you have some goals you are setting and working towards.

Do you think you would be able to talk to a councilor or therapist? It's really helpful to talk to someone like this to work out some of the things that are bothering you. Even for a short while. You will learn a lot of strategies that can help you cope with your problems.

Just know that even though you may not like your situation now, there is the ability to change it and build your own life and future that will make you happy, if you are willing to work at making good choices that will allow you to do so. Find what you believe in and what motivates you to try to be better.

Good luck.

Answer 7

Please don't kill yourself.  I don't think being 5 feet tall and 8 stone is such a terrible thing.  Most of us have had to stop and re-assess what we thought was important in our lives at some time, and it sounds like you've reached one of those points.  Being thin does not equal being happy, it just means a great deal more worrying about how to stay thin (and worrying about dieting 24/7).  

You're separated from the people and places you know best, and everything feels unfamiliar.  I can't solve the problem, but I can tell you how I dealt with the homesickness part.  I just dealt with it one day at a time.  I suppose if I had smiled a bit more, I would have found friends more quickly, but I didn't.  I spent a miserable few months until I found someone else who seemed to be just as miserable as I was, and we each tried to prove we were more miserable and unwanted and misunderstood than the other.   I can't look back and see exactly where it ended, but it did.

Everyone has "something" wrong with them, probably I should have said "things".  Mostly, they just learn to deal with it.  Those who say they don't are liars.

One last thing that I think deserves capital letters.

DON'T LET GLOSSY MAGAZINES TELL YOU WHAT VALUES YOU SHOULD HAVE.

The main reason they sell is because they are full of apparently beautiful people leading apparently perfect lives, the publishers know this and cash in on it.

Start talking to people again, even if it means giving up listening to music 24/7, and try to give any conversations you have your full attention.  People are happier if you seem interested.  

Just take it one day at a time.  Good luck.

Answer 8

You're suffering from severe depression, low self-esteem and suicidal ideations.  You need psychiatric help, which consists of counseling, medication, and possibly hypnosis to determine the underlying causes of your depression, and the fact that you can't seem to "find" yourself.  I would suggest that you get help immediately before you do yourself great harm.  This question does not belong in Words and Wordplay, by the way.  

Answer 9

indeed ur life may be hard but u got to think about others ppls lifes too how will ur bf be w/o u u should ask him tat and ur family too and it mite sound wrong way but u should get a job to get distracted u mite meet good friends at ur job do more things with ur bf. i know i not an expert but i do feel tat way if u belive in a god go to church pray more sing the music in church makes me feel btr think tat maybe one day u will find ur meaning it mite seem like a drag at the moment but thigns could change u could even marry ur bf .fairy tale endings can happen but will u try to achieve tat goal

Answer 10

Sometimes you need to let yourself feel down and then have a good cry. But to help yourself carry on you need to train yourself to be a genuine positive thinker, even if it doesn't cure how your feeling completely it can only help that you look for the good in situations. Besides that talking can really help. Talk about your problems and keep looking for a solution, don't moan too much because that won't solve anything. People feel like you do all the time, once you realise that your not alone at all, and that in fact all those people who feel like you also think their alone, you won't so isolated. You want to be happy? Think of ways you could be happy. What do you want out of life? Your here, so you may as well enjoy the experience rather than punishing yourself with thoughts of death. Try to take life less seriously, just walk with the punches, take the bad bits and move on, that's all you can do. Obviously you can't force yourself to be happy when your sad, but you can try and help yourself by working things out, looking forward, being positive and more laid back. Hope you feel better real soon.