Wanting to be loved, ends up to alot of drinking and regrets. help?

Question

ive had a pretty bad life

been throught, some horrible things

and now, i have a huge yearning to be loved

ill go to a party, and drink way to much

some guy will be nice to me, and my judgement is very clouded

want to be loved, has caused me more problems, than when i started

help?

Answer 1

Love has to start within you.   Love yourself first and then others will love you in return.   Life suchs many times, but you need to crawl out from under and learn to overcome your obstacles.   Pamper yourself and find out who you are - then love will take care of itself.

Answer 2

You sound like exactually where i was 6 months ago.

I went through a really bad break up January 2007 and alot of things happened so in stead of dealing with everything i went out looking to replace what i had lost and what i was missing i was getting drunk every weekend and taking random guys home then wake up the next morning and regret it back to square one. I cant really say what made me wake up because i dont know what it was in February 2008 i had a breakdown i finally hit rock bottom and realised i cant live the way i was living i was comtemplating suicide because i didnt think anyone would miss me and i had made so many stuff ups so why not just end it. That scared the h**l out of me for me to get that low that i just want to end it was my wake up call i think. I had to reavaulate my life what i was doing what direction i was going in and change that direction. I stopped drinking i still went out with friends but didnt drink it was hard but so worth it i quit my job and moved back to my home town where all my support system is my family, friends and my little boy and his dad i faced everything face on. It has been 6 months and it has been so hard i hardly drink now i am working two jobs so i work at least 60 hours a week i am mending my relationship with my ex partner who is the father of my little boy and i am forming a tighter bond with my little boy. YOu have to look at your life and realise what is important you are important your family and friends are important think about what you want and work towards it. Stop looking for love i know it is hard to do just concentrate on building yourself up and working hard and maintaining a good relationship with your friends and family they all love you. When you are happy in yourself you will be surprised what you can achive and you will find that special someone to love and cherish you but you have to stop looking they will find you. Good luck :)

Answer 3

I don't blame you for wanting to be loved, but you ought to take a time out, and figure out just what kind of man you want. First step is to figure out why you are doing what you are doing. Second step is to learn how to respect yourself and learn who you are, that way you can find someone who can see who you are through your eyes.

Good luck baby

Answer 4

Well even though you may love it, stop going to parties would be an ideal place to start helping yourself.... I know the yearning that you speak of, and it can be devastating, but going through what you're doing is not the way to seek love...

Answer 5

every body wants to be loved but the answer isnt in a bottle ..... just be your self and it will come along...... old cliche here.... when you least expect it

Answer 6

i know this situation all too well...

idk about your beliefs in God or anything, but i've been down this road for so long. i'm considered muslim, so i'm not preaching anything to you. trust me, i couldn't care less lol. but just "pray".. say how sorry you are. say how much you need help. scream, cry, whatever it takes. let it out.

it sounds incredibly lame and corny. but it worked for me, & i've stopped drinking & doing things that i completely regreted. i've become such a happy person, i really can't even explain the feeling. you deserve so much better then a 'one night stand'.everyone does. i've learned that, & i'm sure that you will too.

try getting involved in something you love to do. i personally love drawing, singing, and bellydancing. i was at my lowest point.. bawling my eyes out wondering what i was going to do. i looked to my left & i saw a bellydancing add in a magazine i was looking at earlier that week. i enrolled myself and my mom.. & i havent touched alcohol since. my attitude towards everything has changed. i've completely made a 360.

it just makes you feel good inside to know that your doing something for you. i've opened up to my friends more, i've gotten closer to my family, & i've become a stronger person all together.

i strongly suggest you take part in something productive that you love. maybe volenteer, go to a gym or run around the block, (which i did by the way & i look/feel better then ever!)

go shopping for a new outfit thats a completely different style then you normally go for but know you'll feel amazing in.

i know its hard to understand, but you have to love yourself before anything. learn that you are a special person all by yourself, you dont need someone telling you. you need to see it for yourself. your a great person, and you should show it.

good luck, i know you can do it.

you just need that little extra push =)

Answer 7

Don't drink and get pissed very unattractive.And you tend to become easy when on the turps.Love will find You when You are not looking for it,So just relax and Mr right will pop up when You are least expecting him too.

Answer 8

Find a rich dude and let him knock you up.

Answer 9

Wanting to be loved means being able to give love. When you say your judgement is clouded probably means you are an easy lay, that's not love. I f the people you go with treat you this way then you deserve what you get. Pull yourself together and begin a new chapter in your life by treating yourself with some respect and cut down on the drinking and some day you may meet some body you will truly love and who will love you.

Answer 10

Bonnie you are now creating a past that you will regret for the rest of your life if you keep this up. You are vulnerable when drunk and capable of doing things you wouldn't do if sober. Think about it. No one will love you more if you are drunk. But people, especial guys will respect you more if you keep yourself decent, even though they pretend otherwise. Never do ANYTHING just to be popular. It never works out in the long run. Trust me I've been in your shoes. Make yourself a class act and keep it that way for the rest of your life you'll get all the love you need.  Be patient, you make your own choices and you obviously know you are making a mistake already, so you are no idiot. Don't  ever act like one just to please "Some Guy".  No one loves a drunk for long. Good luck. xx