Wanting to get married?

Question

i have been with my boyfriend for almost 9 yrs. and i want to get married. in 06 he said yes we were just waiting for income tax but then we got pregnant so the money went to the baby. now in 08 i ask and he says no and wont give me a reason he just says no.he is in school but will be done in nov and i don't want the wedding till next year in aug (hoping) what should i do

Answer 1

maybe he wants to ask YOU... wait it out until after he graduates... then get him drunk and fly to vegas!  

Answer 2

I'd not ask again.  Perhaps when he is finished with school, he''l bring it up, but if he doesn't you may want to consider either living together as an unmarried couple or moving on.  Some people just aren't into marriage.

"we are livivng together 5 years and have 2 kids a 7yr old boy and 1 year old girl

he had already said yes to getting married before we had the baby"

And yet here you are, still unmarried.  It appears that marriage may not be his cup of tea.  If he refuses to tell you his reasons, then he probably feels pressured.  Five years is more than enough time.  It's now or never.

Answer 3

The same thing I'm doing:  Tell him if he doesn't want to get married, that it's ok, you respect that, but marriage is something you want in your life, and if he doesn't want to get married, you're going to see other people.  You don't need to be mean or fight about it, but if you really want to get married, then you need to find someone else who DOES want to get married.  When someone shows you who they are, believe them.  If you go this route, you need to follow through with it, or you will end up running in circles, and you probably won't end up married.  Chances are, that the change will give him the opportunity to realize how much he means to you, and he will propose...  OR he won't, and you'll be well on your way to meeting someone with common interests.  I'm in your place right now, and I have a date in mind, and if he doesn't propose by this certain date, then I'm moving on, and I don't care what he says.  Life is too short to let someone else have that much control over the rest of your life and waste that much of your time.  Then again, if you're not ready to take this step, then accept the fact that he doesn't want to get married, and leave it alone.  Nagging him will only make the situation worse.  Whatever decision you make, make sure it's one you're ok with.  Good luck!

Answer 4

Don't be too hurry, maybe at the end you'll be glad just wait the good and right timing.

Answer 5

I don't know much about your boyfriend since you didn't leave details but if he is the romantic type he may have said no because he wants to ask you. My husband and I got married in secret for our own reasons but he is still going to propose in a special way on a day I don't know about. I hope the answer for you is something special like that. Good luck girl :)

Answer 6

Listen , marriage is a decision you both have to agree on, but not only because it´s time or the right time or because you´re having a baby. You must love each other and feel fully committed to do this. This baby needs two loving parents and a stable home, are you ready to provide that? Because it´s not only about providing food and clothes. You need to sit and talk about this. Many couples get married because they get pregnant but it´s more of "something they got to do" and it´s just not fair for them or the baby!

If you´re going to get married it better be for the right reasons. And if you decide not to, then you still have to be parents to this child and be responsible. Parenthood for you two won´t be over for not getting married. You need to be very concious on what you´re going to decide because that decision will be the future for this baby.