Wants my ex back? ?

Question

Because of that he's an hypocrite--I was the one who broke up with him and now I feel like I want him back. It has been 4 months since then but it feels like yesterday...

What can i do to not have this second thought?

Answer 1

Sit down and write a list of all the bad things you can think of on the right side of a piece of  paper and then on the left side write down all the things that are good about him.  

Now make a list of all the qualities you would like to see in a future mate.  Put the list in order of importance once you have it done.  For instance, if you want a mate that likes and wants children and that is very important, put it near the top of the list.  

Now compare the list of your ex to the list of your dream man.  

Now comes the hard part.  Realize that you can not change people.  You have to accept people for who they are, not who you want them to be.  People can change but only if THEY want to.  You can have a desire for someone to change but you can't make GOALS for them to achieve change.  No one should be in a relationship where they are not accepted for who they are.  It is not fair to either party.  On the other hand, no one is perfect.  There is no perfect dream man!

I'm 54 years old and have been with my husband for 34 years.  We have only had fleeting moments of 'chemistry.'  He has always loved me more than I loved him.  When I accepted his offer of marriage I'd been in a lot of relationships with men I'd loved and had chemistry with but who would never commit to me.  At age 26 I decided to 'settle' for a faithful, loyal, funny, and smart man.  I felt my chronological clock ticking.  My mother had me at 40.  It was rough.  Now I'm 54 years old with no mother!  So I wanted to get married and have children on the younger side.

By choosing not to wait for Mr. Right I resigned myself to a life with a man that I was not really in love with.  In the process we have perhaps both been robbed of the chance of really finding our 'soul mates.'  Don't settle for second best!  

Find a man that treats you right, who you are madly in love with, who gives you tingles inside.    Wait for him!  Don't be anxious!  When you have him you will know!

Answer 2

Just keep in the front of your mind why you broke up in the 1st place. Think about the things that were wrong in the relationship...and if some how you feel you can deal with those same issues again and you would be OK with it...then try to get him back.

When it's all said and done, I bet you will realize that you made the right choice and you don't want to go back to the same situation you got out of.

Plus, I personally have found the best way to get over an ex is to move on to the next! :-) Dealing with someone new will lessen how much you think of your ex.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

u could remember what broke u up,and hurt u enough that u had to break up with them.