Was it right for me to get thumbs down for sharing how I feel about men and women?

Question

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AmYP3NdAplRSESRwDZ9EBCLsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20080717070502AAqCUzU&show=7#profile-info-7Ra7p7xjaa

Do I need help or am I ok the way I am?

Please read.

Answer 1

It was wrong.  I agree with you.  Don't worry  what others think.

Answer 2

You're fine the way you are and you don't have to change your opinion - it's yours and you're entitled to it whether you get a thumbs down or not.

You could change the way you ask questions, to make it clear that you're asking for opinions, rather than making a statement to see who agrees with you.

If you write "Guys are way too effeminite.. they like to put on dresses and wear makeup"  You're insulting masculine and effeminite men at the same time. Not all men are the same. Any time you make a generalisation you'll find people who are not at all like that and don't want to be lumped in with those who are.

A better way to put it would be to ask whether people think gender roles have changed too much, and what the consequences for families will be if there isn't any difference between men and women.   You can still say why you think it would be a bad thing and give your reasons.  It's a perfectly valid question.

If you really want to know what people think, ask the question in a neutral way - not 'this is bad, don't you agree?' but 'I think this, what do you think?'  The less hostile the question is, the more people will respond positively.

Answer 3

You judged others they judged you.  I think you need to look inside of yourself if strangers can make you doubt who you are.  I think it is said that you are going for robotics and will probably end up with some stupid part time job, why go to school at all.  One day do you plan on being in your career field as I know you are smart enough to know robotic engineers are never hired part time so that would be the job you get?  

I do have to say in regards to this part of your comment

As a female I believe in:

*Cooking for her guy

*making sure I look great and in shape everyday

*Taking care of the kids

*Have breakfast,lunch,dinner ready

*Make sure he knows I love him and that he is doing a great job

*Never speak on his flaws but praise his greatness

*Wear and dress like a female (love this)

That most of those women you say are being manly do all this stuff to on top of it.  Also you plan on getting married but you have never dated... Do you realize it is going to be hard to get married if you don't date?

Answer 4

People give thumbs up and thumbs down based on whether or not they agree with the answer, so four people must have disagreed with you.

Answer 5

The thumbs-down brigade are almost as bad as the report monkeys.

Pay no attention to them.

Answer 6

You are fine the way you are but you just need to develop a thicker skin and not let trivialities like thumbs up or down bother you.

Alot worse happens in this section.

Answer 7

Yes.  You are on a public site which allows others (as well as yourself) to voice their opinions.  At times people do not agree with you and they are free to voice that through anonymous thumbs down.  But I agree with Molly, you don't need some random stranger's opinion to validate yourself....especially when we are talking about "thumbs ups and downs".  Live as you see fit for you.

Answer 8

If I could, I would give you a thumbs down on this question....not on your previous answer!  Your insecurity is staggering....and you need to toughen up a little - don't you think?  You must realize that your view is not going to be popular with certain factions of women, and if you want to maintain this view - you either need to do so quietly, or get some thicker skin!

Answer 9

You don't need validation from a bunch of strangers to know that you are ok the way you are.  It's ok that you got thumbs down, thats what happens when people have differing views.

Answer 10

You're fine the way you are.  Who cares what other people think, and especially who cares about thumbs down.  You did get 2 thumbs up you know, so that does mean 2 people out there did agree with you.  Not everybody thinks or believes the same, and never will.  There is no need for you worry about such trivial things!

Answer 11

People only thumb yuo down if they don't agree with you, so they are just displaying that they don't think the same way you do.

Answer 12

It's beneficial for a woman like you to express your opinions.  After all, that's part of women's rights.

Answer 13

to be honest Jenny... why are you looking for validation?

The great thing about freedom is you have the right to choose what path you walk... so walk it and don't let others mold you into their interpretation of a women.

Answer 14

Molly B is right. Don't get to happy with the thumbs up and don't get to sad about the thumbs down. If I was posting on a White Supremacist website I would fully expect a lot of thumbs down.

Answer 15

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you feeling that YOU (as a woman) should cook for a guy, make sure you look good and stay in shape, bare and take care of children, never speak on his flaws or wear dresses that make you look female. That’s your choice, your opinion, and you have the right to voice it. But realize that there are many other people in here who have the right to disagree with you (both men and women alike).

But I think another reason why people gave you a thumb down in because you also contradict yourself with in your own statement. (And I don’t k now if this was miss-typed) but you stated that

“That’s just me naturally and I never dated in my life because I fear a guy will use me for that”.

In order for you to really and fully agree with the beliefs that you’re preaching, you have to be ready and willing to trust a man to perform the acts that you’ve brought forward. So in my own personal opinion, by you making that statement it further shows me that you really don’t believe in what you say! Because a woman who believe in these values will be willing to allow her self to be in a relationship with a man where she can carry out these duties.  

And by receiving a degree in robotics (which I give you the highest praise for) you show that even though you believe in these traditional roles of women, you’re really not as traditional as you think you are.  I work in the Information Technology field (which is traditionally male) and even though I believe in taking care of my man, I know I won’t have time to have breakfast/lunch/dinner ready, clean, wear dresses (because my duties at work really don’t allow me too, unless I want people to see my underwear), and have kids. Because the majority of my time is spent at work, at school, in training, or in the gym (remember, a girl’s gotta take care of her looks).

And how will you be able to work part time, go to the gym, cook three meals, and wear a dress if you have a husband and kids that you plan to play the “traditional female roles” for, and still hold a part time job in Robotic Technology. I really don’t think there are any part time jobs for people working in robotics to tell you the truth. I’m single with no kids and I still struggle to find time for myself. I think you may want to re-evaluate what you believe you as a woman should do or do not want to do. If you want to be married and be a stay at home mom, fine (I don’t see it lasting long after you realize the work that goes into keeping the image you want to portray) so be it. If you still want to get married and have kids but be a career mom, that’s fine also (be realize it won’t be easy). If you chose to be single while starting your lucrative career in robotics, that’s find as well (just take your time and find the right man that you would be willing to do these things for).  It can work, and it does. But it only works for the women who’ve waited for the right guy to come along, after she’s lived her life and did what she’s wanted to do in her life; and not what everyone else believes she should do because she’s a woman.  To me (and I’m sure many others) it sounds like you’re flip-flopping on the issues you’ve raised. Which is why I think you received the thumbs down.

Answer 16

No honey, you are right on. Your kind f thinking makes other people feel threatened and/or guilty. You do not deserve thumbs down.

Answer 17

Don't worry about the tumbs down.  I'll pick up three or four in this answer just because I typed something.  Just be yourself.  It sounds like the behavior you described feels very natural and fulfilling for you.  People who can't respect that aren't really very interesting in "liberating" you or anyone else.  All they're doing is making you feel out of place for being who you are.  I think you're brave for typing those feelings.

Answer 18

You're bound to get thumbs down no matter what you say.  Do not worry about it.  It matters somewhat what people you know in real life think of you, since you actually have to mix with them, but not at all what a bunch of anonymous strangers on the internet think of you.

Answer 19

Men are too effeminate, and women are too butch. You didn't make any statements that are untrue.

WTF is a metrosexual anyway?

Answer 20

do you need help?  I dunno - what are your expectations?