We're family...but I don't know how to handle it.?

Question

My sister had a baby seven months ago... she moved in about two months ago. Ever since then she has been borrowing money, asking me to babysit and just being lazy. I feel bad saying no when she asks me for favors but she does it all the time. I clean up after her because I don't like the mess and I babysit because he is my nephew but its getting out of hand. I don't know what to do...I just can't take this anymore.. How can I talk to her about it without her getting mad at me?

Thanks :)

Answer 1

You are just going to have to bite the bullet and have a serious talk with her. This can only get worse for you if you don't. You don't have to be nasty or snide to her when you talk just be calm and explain how you feel.

Answer 2

Sometimes especially when dealing with family, tough love is the best love. It can be hard because you don't want to hurt their feelings, but you can't let her walk over you and take advantage of you either. Sit her down and tell her that if she is not going to contribute weather it be by getting a job, or cleaning up, she will have to find some where else to stay. You have to be firm and let her know it's nothing personal, but she has to grow up now and be a mother not a glorified baby sitter. If she straightens up and acts right then it's because she knew better, and just wanted to see how far she could push it, and she was just waiting for the much needed kick in the rear end. But if she takes it personal and gets offended she still has a lot of growing up to do. You can give her tough love without being mean, so try to be a nice as possible, but as stern as possible. Meaning put your foot down and stand behind it. Good luck

Answer 3

This may be a hard situation, but the truth is you need to speak up. This is not your problem. You've given up enough of your life by limiting the space you have when she moved in, and it is not your job to look after this baby twenty four seven. When you talk to her, be sure to stress that you are there to help, but you can't help her all the time. You have a life too, and although you love her, you cant support both her and her kid. As for her being mad, yea she probably will, but in the end where is she going to go? People get mad at situations like these, but she really has no right to be lazy and expect you to pick up the slack. Best of Luck to you