Wedding Ceremony Procedure Help

Question

I am not having a religious ceremony - a Judge will be marrying my FH and I - it will be at the same place of the reception -

He emailed me his "speech" and it's literally 5 minutes long. I would like to add a unity candel, a poem reading (or 2), and one or two other things to make the ceremony a little bit more meaningful.

What else can I add and what is the order of these events?

Answer 1

Well before you go adding anything you need to talk with your officiant about this.  He may not be up to all this fluff.

He's a civil judge used to doing civil ceremonies & most times that's how long they are; 5 minutes.

I'm sorry, but your ceremony may not be what you envision.

But adding a reading & the unity candle will add some length to your ceremony.  I try to keep mine around 18-20 minutes unless the couple stress that they want it s-h-o-r-t.

Answer 2

Read through his speech again and look for natural breaks in it.  (Like just before you take your vows, or exchange rings)  Those would be good places to put in a song for someone to sing, or play on CD.  Or to put in poem readings. The unity candle comes at the end of the ceremony. Our minister has put ours in after 'You may kiss the Bride" and he pronounces us married, but before we are introduced to the guests as Mr and Mrs...  

Something else you might consider:  He has also included signing of the marriage license in the ceremony.  The plan is for us to light the unity candle, take communion and pray together, then we step back away from the altar table and our witnesses step up and sign the license. (All this time, we have an appropriate CD musical selection playing.)  I've never been to a wedding where the license signing was part of the ceremony, but I really liked the idea when the minister suggested it.  After that is done, then we will be introduced as Mr. and Mrs. and walk back down the aisle together.

Answer 3

Ok, here's the layout of my wedding, I found my program:

Prelude:

  Seating of the Parents

  Lighting of the Candles

  "song"

Processional

  song - canon in D

  song - trumpet voluntary

Declaration of intention

  song

Scripture readings

  1 Cor 13 (great for including someone in the wedding w/o being in the wedding party)

  Mark 10:6-9

Prayer

Sermon

Marriage Vows

Exchange of Rings

  song

  lighting of the unity candle

Announcement of husband and wife

prayer

benediction

presentation of bride and groom

recessional

  song - rondeau

Well I hope that helps you out!!!!  Hope it's wonderful!

Answer 4

Here is a basic ceremony for you:

SIMPLE CEREMONY with Wine Blessing

"Dear family and friends, we have gathered here today to witness and celebrate the wedding of BRIDE and GROOM”.

"Marriage is the promise of hope between two people who love each other sincerely, who honor each other as individuals, and who wish to unite their lives and share the future together. In this ceremony, they dedicate themselves to the happiness and well-being of each other, in a union of mutual caring and responsibility."

"We rejoice with GROOM and BRIDE that out of all the world they have found each other, and that they will henceforth find the deeper meaning and richness of human life in sharing it with each other."

WITNESS SUPPORT

(To family/witnesses)

Dear family and friends, BRIDE and GROOM have invited you here today to witness and celebrate this public declaration of the private commitment they have already made to one another."

You know the happiness that this couple has found together, and you are witnesses to the pledges they will make to each other for the mutual service of their common life.

[Name and Name] will need your friendship and support in the future, as well as they do on this day. Do you offer your blessing and support for this couple, and wish them the best of lives together?

If so, say “WE DO”.  

FAMILY/FRIENDS MEMORIAL (optional)

Our community is also shared by those who cannot be here today, and those have left this life. Their roles in the lives of BRIDE and GROOM are honored and remembered as we savor today's joyous moments. Join with us, then, in fond recognition/memory of all these people, and in particular [List names of family and friends if desired].  

Let us bring them into our thoughts and our hearts”.  

UNITY CANDLE (optional)

I now invite [Name] and [Name’s]  parents (or a family member, or a designated friend) to each light a candle, representing each of the families of this couple.



The Bride and Groom will now light a central symbolizing the union of their two families in this marriage and the richness each brings to this new union.



As they light the central candle, they do not extinguish their own flames. Although they are embarking upon a new and unique relationship by joining their lives in marriage, they will retain their own separate and unique heritage, and identity, each enriching the other.  However, from this day forward, they will create a new family, new stories, and new traditions, together.

PERSONAL STATEMENTS: (optional)

The bride and groom would each like to share a few words with you.

READING (optional)

In honor of their wedding today, this couple have selected the following readings. [Readers are introduced and come forward as called]

INTENTION

NAME and NAME, Please face each other."

"[Name] are you ready to enter into this marriage with [Name], believing the love you share and your faith in each other will endure all things?"

[Name]: "I am."

"Will you please join your hands".

VOWS

“The pledges you will now repeat are a statement of present intent and commitment. They cannot endure unless you make them endure, with the resources you will draw from deep within yourselves”.

“The hand offered by each of you is an extension of your self, just as is your mutual love. Cherish the touch, for you touch not only your own, but another life.

Vows may be original, or follow the sample below:

to BRIDE and GROOM in turn,

Repeat after me:

I [Name] take you,[Name],

to be no other than yourself.

Loving what I know of you

trusting what I do not yet know

with respect for your integrity

and faith in your love for me

through all our years

and in all that life may bring us

THE RING CEREMONY

"[Name], what symbol do you give that you will perform your vows?"

RESPONSE:  THIS RING

"[Name], do you receive this ring from [NAME] ?"

RESPONSE: "I do."

[Name] places ring on [Name's] finger

Celebrant prompting, with BRIDE/GROOM repeating:

"[Name], this ring I give to you in pledge

of my constant faith and abiding love."

May you who give it and you who wear it

honour in life the pledge for which it stands.

May every blessing and grace be yours,

as your lives are now bound in each other’s keeping

WINE BLESSING CEREMONY (optional)

“The years of our lives are as a cup of wine poured out for us to drink. “

GROOM and BRIDE this cup will also serve a sign of your unity.

Although you are two persons, you have chosen to unite your lives and seek your happiness together.

You drink from the same cup to be reminded that you will share life’s pain and pleasures, sorrows and joys.

Drink now to each other from this cup, and may the cup of all your lives be sweet and full."

And/or:  (3 sips, after each line)

"And now please drink to the love you've shared in the past."

"Drink to your love in the present, on this the day of your wedding."

"And drink to your love in the future and as long as time is yours."

CLOSING BLESSING

The peace of the running water to you,

The peace of the flowing air to you,

The peace of the quiet earth to you,

The peace of the shining star to you,

And the love and the care of all of us to you

And/or

May all that is noble, lovely, and true abide with you forever.

Go now in peace, and may peace attend you all your days.

DECLARATION

"You have spoken your promises. You have exchanged the signs of your commitment each to each. It is thus with great pleasure that I declare that you have married each other in the presence of these witnesses. I now pronounce, by the authority vested in me, and in accordance with the laws of the State of ______, that they are husband and wife."  

KISS/EMBRACE

SIGNING OF MARRIAGE LICENSE

PRESENTATION:

I now have the great honor to present to you the new couple:

[NAME AND NAME]  BRIDE and GROOM

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm sure you can find nice readings, but I put a link to a short page of readings below.  Good luck! happy wedding!

Answer 5

Why do you want to make it longer?  I had a church wedding, unity candle, rings and all.  9 min from the time I walked down the aisle to when we walked out together.  Add what you want to make it yours but don't feel like it has to be a certain length.  If you are happy with it go for it.

Good luck

Answer 6

could you find a longer speech and ask that he use it?  i don't see why that would be a problem.

another idea:

you could each give a rose to your mothers