Wedding father/daughter dance when you have 2 dads?

Question

My step-father has been very instrumental in my life - always supported me, me put through college, helped me buy my first place, etc. However, my true father has always been there as well - but more-so just loving me and backing me up. I've decided to have both walk me down the isle...but what do I do about the father/daughter dance? I'm worried about one being offended if I choose the other to go first =( Any ideas?

Answer 1

Your biological father should be the first you dance with. i dont think your step-father will be offended at all. It is natural for your biological father to go first. (its becomming common in more recent wedding)

But i think your bio father might be offended if you choose your step-father before him. He wont express it because you come first that day and it is about you.

good luck & congratulations

Answer 2

lucky you! can you do some threesome dance :)

i would say skip the traditional dance altogether and dance with the groom

Answer 3

Three suggestions:

1) Have your real dad walk you down the aisle and be the one to give you away. He is your real father and the one that made you who you are. It's more intimate and gives a personal feeling to it. If you walk down the aisle with two men, people might assume you were raised by two g*y persons. lol. sorry no offense.

2) Your stepfather should get the dance with you. It also gives you a personal one on one with him that your mother remarried to. From what you says, he has done the most than your father and he should get the credit for it.

3) If you're still insistent on having both walk you down the aisle, then for the father/daugther dance, have the DJ incorporate the two songs (mix it up) into one song. This way each song has a special meaning to you and your father and you and stepfather. It doesn't have to play the whole song, but that depends on your wedding day timeline if you have time for two songs.

Answer 4

I think that you should sit down with each of your dad's and talk to them about this.  First you should decide who you want to dance with first and go with that choice and when you talk to them prior to the wedding ask with they are okay with that decision.

I personally would chose the man who has really been a Dad to me who has done the fatherly things.  

If these two men have a good relationship together I don't think that either of them would get offended.  I am sure that they think it is great that you are just including them both.  I think that it is wonderful that you are including them both!

Good luck...but you pick who you would like to dance with first and  than talk to them.  I am sure that they will understand.

Answer 5

first your really lucky,congratulations on that.  I would say bring them both out and do a sort of group hug dancy thing or it seems like from your description that the step dad is the one you lived with and did alot for you so as a dad, I would have to say he earned the right to go first. being a dad dosent really have anything to do with biology or dna. its the journey that takes a little helpless baby and ends up with an independant adult.  good luck and have a nice wedding

Answer 6

I would say whoever you feel is closer to you. You should do the dance with your biological father - then maybe do another dance with your step father. Your real dad's "little girl" is getting married - your stepdad I'm sure should be ok with this and should get over it.

Answer 7

That is a tough decision. I also think it's extremely sweet to include both of them. I really don't think either will be offended if you choose one to go first. I danced with my step-dad to Faith Hills "There you'll be" It was very fitting. Have a fabulous wedding!

~MLF~

Answer 8

See if you can have 2 songs instead of one. This way each song is special so that you can dance with both

Answer 9

in this day and age the traditional wedding is going away..Have a father daughter dance and a step-father dance why not? They marry g*y couples now !!! Have the wedding set up the way you want ! Remember its your day....

Answer 10

Why not dance with both (not at the same time) but both to one song.

Kinda switch over halfway through the song to dance with your 'other dad'.  That way you are not really putting one before the other.

I don't think, this way, that it will matter much who dances the first couple of minutes with you and i really don't think any of your dads will think anything by it or feel offended by this (They probably understand the predicament your in)  They both sound like they have been wonderful father figures in your life and wwouldn't want you to be stressing about something like this on your wedding day.

By the way...GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 11

Dance with you true father first to a song of your choose and then when it is over dance with your step-father to a diffrent song of your choose.  This way they both get a special song and they both get to dance with you.

Answer 12

I would ask your real dad to dance first simply because it should cause the least hurt to anyone.  He is your biological father so even though your step-dad has been a maor part of your life, she should understand wanting your real dad to go first.  They dont have to like eachother, but they do have ot act ccil to one another for your sake so I think no matter what you do, they should respect it and know that you love them both.

Answer 13

Dance with your real father first. He is your biological father and should have the right to dance with you first. For your first dance, pick something slightly longer than a normal song, and then you can share the dance. Work out where 'half way' is ,and dance half of it with your real dad and with your stepdad. He shouldn't get offended, because he should understand your real dad is your real dad. But if he does get offended, then he doesn't deserve to dance with you.

Enjoy your special day x

Answer 14

well bio dad would get the first dance with a song for just the two of you

then step dad would get a dance with his special song.

make the songs special just for the two of you dancing at the time.  

good luck

Answer 15

its your day, its your choice.

if it was me, i would select 2 special songs and dance with both of them. they are obviously both special in your life. there's no reason for you to have to pick and choose.

enjoy your day!

Answer 16

It's too hard to say and get an exact answer! I personally suggest you refer to the "Ask April Dating Tips" on ---http:// www.richmingle.com for more good advice for your question.

Answer 17

If they don't get along, how awkward is it going to be to have them both walk you down the isle? Just a suggestion.  Explain to them that both have been a great part of your life for different reasons and that they need to share this day in some manner.  Maybe your step dad could walk you out and your real dad stand up to meet you half way down the isle and give you away?  Then when it comes time to dance...ask them both to pick out a song that they feel means something special to the two of you, represents the two of you...then dance with your bio father first to the dance of his choice, then with your step dad to the song of his choice.  Unfortunately this is the fall out of bad divorces and combined families....kids always pay the price!

Answer 18

Thats nice that you have two great dads, and that they are both walking you down the isle. Thats a really great way to show that they are both important to you.

But I think you'll have to give the Father/Daughter dance a miss. Ive been reading through the other suggestions, and I dont see how you could do that in real life. Like, being spun from one dad to the other mid-song. Its awkward and strange.

You've already included both Dads in the ceremony, leave it at that. Have a newlywed dance with your husband, and find a time to dance with both dads, but dont do the whole big 'look at us' thing.

Congrats, good luck!

EDIT: Tell your MIL you're sorry, but its too awkward. She can still dance with her son, just dont call it the 'Mother-Son Dance' and draw a bunch of attention to it.

Moments like this are just some of the casualties of a bad divorce, I'm sure you've had to miss out on things before because of that.

Be firm with your mother in law! Good luck!

Answer 19

Switch back and fourth during the dance

get it corrdinated so every 2 minutes the one dad can twirl you back to the other dad