Wedding gift protocol?

Question

My cousin is getting married in Indiana. My whole family is going (flying out from the west coast) and even my sister who lives abroad will come. We are not part of the wedding party. My question is what is the protocol on the wedding gift? Do we still have to buy my cousin individual wedding gifts? Me and my siblings are young professionals and we attending with our parents. I know the standard protocol for wedding gift is that the value of the gift should be equal to how much the price-per-head the couple is paying in the reception. But we are already spending air fare and hotel rooms for the trip. Any suggestions? Should we give them individual gifts or just one from the family and how much should we spend?

Answer 1

It's really up to you and what you can afford. Maybe you and your siblings can chip in on a gift from all of you. If you each chipped in 15-20 dollars, you could get them something nice.

Answer 2

In this situation, I think a gift from the family is appropriate. It doesn't need to be anything big, just something that says congratulations.

Similar story: my friend had family coming in from out of town and they boxed and giftwrapped copies of their hotel, airfare, and car reservations (no prices included). I thought it was hilarious, and got the point across, but my friend wasn't as amused.  

Answer 3

Just spend what you can afford, don't worry about any kind of protocol.  I would send a card at the least though, just with some best wishes.

We have 45 guests flying in for our wedding, some have sent gifts, some have not, and we have no expectations, we are just happy they are able to attend.  I'm sure your cousin will feel the same.  

Answer 4

A wedding gift is never required.  You are not obligated to buy a gift at all.  I think that protocol about the value is a bunch of c**p.  You are more than welcome to buy individual or group gifts and the amount should be only what you want to spend and can afford.

Answer 5

If I were getting married I would not be upset if you weren't able to get me a gift at all.  I would say just get what you can afford.  Maybe you all can chip in and get one big gift or gift card?

Answer 6

The 'gift' is your presence at their wedding. Anything else is not required. If you can afford as a family to get one big gift off their registry, I think that's above and beyond.  

Answer 7

A gift from the family should suffice :)

Answer 8

You can do it either way.  I'm sure that your cousin will appreciate it, regardless of the cost.  Have your group buy a gift card.