Wedding or Graduation?

Question

If you were asked to be the maid-of-honor in your best friend who happens to be pretty much your sister's wedding but the date of the wedding happened to be on the date of your brother's high school graduation, what would you do? I'm at a such a loss right now. If I got to the wedding, my mom won't support me in the family anymore and she'll kick me out, but if I don't go, I'm going to majorly disappoint everyone else. What would you guys do in this situation?

Answer 1

Go support your family. You can look at pictures of the wedding later and it's not like you really want to wear that atrocious bride's maid dress.

Answer 2

Yeah, I think your age here in an important part of the information.  Tough one though . . . If it were easy to do, I would go to the wedding and have the family reschedule the graduation party and attend that. A wedding is the BIGGEST day in someone's life, your friend, while she may understand why you can't be there, will be missing a part of her day.  

Answer 3

How does your brother feel?  If either of my sisters had this problem I'd tell them to absolutely go to the wedding.  At a graduation, you're just sitting in the stands watching a ceremony you're not really a participant.

To be there with your best friend and help her get dressed, and be right next to her as she commits to spend the rest of her life with her husband...wow.

No contest, I'd pick the wedding if my sibling was fine with it, regardless of what my parents thought.  Your brother probably doesn't care.

Answer 4

I'm skipping my own convocation to attend my husband's cousin's wedding. This is the only degree I'm getting, and this was a given. I'd point out to your mom that she's being unreasonable. I somehow doubt she'd disown you for supporting your friend. If she actually would you probably want to cut ties anyhow.

Answer 5

I would try to do both. One of my bridesmaids is actually going to a horse show the morning of the wedding.

Answer 6

Family comes first. Go to the graduation. Your friend should understand, and while you will both be disappointed, you will regret not attending your brother’s graduation. This is a big day for him, be supportive. Good luck.

Answer 7

Hi.  Although the wedding sounds like more fun, and hopefully this is a one time event....so is your brother's graduation.  You will never have another high school graduation.  So, my advice is to go to your brother's high school graduation.  It IS a big deal when you are a senior.  Is there going to be a party after?  Truthfully, I like high school grad parties.  Athough I live in a small town, so they are a big deal here....LOTS of people.

Answer 8

Go to your brother's graduation. Unless the timing works out, then go to both. One of my cousins got married on 06/07/08 and that was the same day of my other cousins high school graduation. My grandma was able to go to both because the graduation was in the morning and the wedding was in the afternoon.

Follow your heart. You can't please everyone all of the time. Communication is the key. Make sure you express these feellings to your friend and your brother.

Answer 9

It does suck but family is first.  And if your family will react like that, its not worth getting into it with them.

can you go to the graduation and still make part of the wedding?  

Answer 10

I would go to the high school graduation.  Your friend will understand that you had a family commitment and you can always get involved in other pre-wedding festivities.

Best wishes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edited to add: Depending on the location of the wedding reception and the graduation, then you may be able to still make an appearance at the wedding reception.

Answer 11

Thats a tough one but your mom should not be acting like that. I would be in the wedding. Yes graduating high school is a big thing but not as big as a wedding.

~MLF~

Answer 12

What time is the Graduation?  What time is the wedding?   Depending on the times I'd see if I could go to both.  Maybe they can push back the wedding by 30 mins or so? if it comes down to it i'd go to the graduation.  family comes first.  Graduation date is known at the first of the year how long has she been planing her wedding?  family will always be there friends come and go. good luck

Answer 13

if your under 18 go to the graduation!

if your over 18 tell you mom to grow up and leave the family on your own terms!

yeah that's a little harsh but still it'syour life you need to do what YOU want to do!

hard choice to be in!  most graduations are done early tho so maybe you can make an appearance at both!

Answer 14

Brother vs. "pretty much" a sibling?

Family or Friend?

I say go with your family, family should ALWAYS come first.

Many people are saying that the wedding is the most important day of your life.  I disagree.  Think about it..when you're 8 - 12, you dream about being a (gasp) teenager, ohmygoodness how cool is that!?!?  When you're a teenager, the most important thing is getting your license.  The world is at your feet then!  When you are 16, the most important thing is being 18, a real adult! And HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION, you're ready for the real world.  Then 21, drinking age, yeah baby. Then college/a job. Buying your fist big thing, like a car.  Meeting somebody.  Getting engaged.  Buying a house.  Getting married.  Having your first kid, your next kid, and any after.  Your kid's first day of school.  Your kid GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL.  Retirement....

The point is, the list is never ending.  There is always something to look forward to as "the most important day of" somebody's life.  But your family will always be there for you.  You should do the same for them....

Answer 15

That'd be easy for me, but it would be easier because my own brother would tell me to go to the wedding.  If it were my graduation, I'd tell my sister to go to the wedding.  If I were the mom, I would say go to the wedding.  I would only go to the graduation if I was still living at home or under the support of my parents.  That is a very serious allegation from your mom, to kick you out of the family, and you don't want to mess with that.  However, as an adult, you make your decisions, she makes hers.

Answer 16

eh i say skip the graduation.

yeah it seems important.but honostly...its a high school graduation.

and they are sooo boring--i would rather party it up at a wedding then attend a graduation that has the same speeches given by the principle.lol.yes its a  brother but eh. boorringg lol

EDIT:

all the way across montana? wow! okay i change my answer.lol.ive been to montana mannnyyy times and the drive sucks.

because of it being so far away i would go to the graduation and then maybe if you see her celebrate it and take her to lunch or something? but yeah that is a long drive.

Answer 17

I would go to my brother's graduations.  

Answer 18

Why is the high school graduation such a big deal? Thats pretty harsh for you mother to react that way. I would have a talk with your mom and let her know what it would mean to your friend to have you there is support of her big day.

Answer 19

Family first, your friend should understand it is your brother graduation....no more explanation need ...on the other hand you going to wedding and your family not speaking to or talking about you to other family member is a lifetime... Just send your friend a real nice gift..

Answer 20

Family first. The graduation.

Answer 21

Talk to your friend.  If she's pretty much your sister, she should understand.  

I missed a few of my siblings graduations.. Will he be having a party?  You should be OK going to that and getting him a gift..

And the more I'm thinking about it, if you're so close, wouldn't your whole fam be invited to the wedding?