Wedding question--for people HAVING a wedding and guests

Question

so, my friend has been dating this guy for about 10 months, but they were not exclusive, but they did see each other every weekedn and 1x a weekeday for pretty much 10 months, they are NOW exculsive, as of 1 week ago.

problem: the boyfriend was invited to a wedding, but without a guest, so the girlfriend is upset. do you think the boyfriend should mention that he's has a girlfriend now? do you think it was bad that he did not mention that he was seeing someone before? is it in poor taste to call the host (bride and groom) and ask that his girlfriend be invited? what would YOU do?

i believe the wedding is in august, but i dont have the date

Answer 1

Either attend without the gf or don't attend. The host has  the right not to invite his gf because of budget or seats constraints. Be understanding.

Answer 2

It couldn't hurt to ask, and / or mention that he has a girlfriend, but that *is* extremely short notice.  Lots of couples have to finalize the number of guests with their caterer, ceremony, and reception sites about a month in advance.  In this situation, it sounds as though they're already past that point.  The fact that your friends have gotten together so recently argues against inconveniencing the bride and groom, who are likely flipping out over planning their wedding.  

The couple has to make choices about whether or not people they invite can bring guests when they send out invitation materials -- if your friends had been exclusive when he got the invitation, he should have brought it up, but since they weren't I'd say it's well within the bounds of etiquette to defer to the wishes and finalized guest list of the marrying couple.

Answer 3

usually when you invite someone and do not include a guest it's a financial reason (ie you cannot afford for everyone to bring a guest) or they are maxed out on the count of people the reception hall will allow. also, i do not think because they are exclusive, she should expect an invite. the bride and groom obviously know him but not her so she has no real reason to expect to be included.

i do think the bf can call and ask if she can come if he wants but i don't think it's a good idea. it puts pressure on the couple to say yes when they may not have the money or space to do so.

Answer 4

Weddings are expensive and the guest list is costly -per plate,I dont know hos many guests they can afford to invite or what their limit is but you can Have the Boyfriend mention to The people he invited that he is dating someone and would really like to bring a date and that  if there is a cancellation- room for one more if he can bring a date.

If she does go then she should help pitch in for the wedding gift!!

( Its nothing personal and he should go with or without her)  

Answer 5

He may have been invited without a guest because they're trying to keep their expenses down, or the place they're using is too small for a bunch of people.  Him seeing someone may be irrelevant, or maybe they only want close friends/family there.  Whatever the reason, they don't HAVE to invite her, especially since they probably don't know her.  She has no reason to be upset here, and there's nothing he can or should do about it.  It would be extremely rude for him to ask them to invite her.  She's just going to have to let this one go and maybe they can hang out once he gets back or something.

Answer 6

If there's ever a single person invited, it's always in good taste to add "and guest" to the end of the invitation.

I don't think it's in poor taste at all for him to call (or find out if he's not that close to the couple) if it were okay for him to bring his new girlfriend.

It would be disrespectful & rude to bring her w/o checking in w/the bride & groom.

Answer 7

Yes he should tell them that he has a GF whom he would like to bring along. Unless on his part this is only casual... but yes the GF feels excluded.. he should have mentioned that to them before. and should still do so if he cares about this girl and not go alone, I don't know what I would think of a guy who left me out.. or unmentioned.. if they say.. there is no more room.. that's different but he definitely should ask.. and one person more should not really make a big difference... she feels rightfully excluded or else if he is not serious about their relationship and only sees this as a casual friendship he needs to tell his GF that...xx

Answer 8

He shouldn't ask directly for an invite.  What he should do is inform everyone he knows about his new relationship, including the hosts of the wedding, and leave it to them to decide whether to invite the girlfriend.