Weird gesture from my friend's dad?

Question

My friend and I went out for dinner with her family, and she tried to stand up and pass her dad to go to the bathroom, but he did not stand, instead he just sat there and motioned for her to move.

When she did pass him, he "smacked" her butt. WITH THE WHOLE FAMILY watching and me as well. Is that weird? Should I be worried for my friend?

Answer 1

Um.. hopefully he's just joking around was being stupid because he was hammered

*Sadly* it's also possible he's abusing his daughter and he was drunk and 'let his guard down'. You need to make sure this isn't the case. You being so freaked out my be a clue this is happening, then again you may just be freaked out because it was a weird thing for him todo. But typically when people get 'creepy feelings' that they can't shake THERE'S A REASON

The warning signs would be low  self esteem, trouble forming bonds, doing *ANYTHING* to stay away from home, lashing out in other ways, self destructive acts, and often quickly moving from guy to guy searching for what she's missing, or just to spite her evil-step-dad

*AND YES* this *TOTALLY* changes things that he's her step dad. You need to first pay extra attention to what's happening. IF she's being abused and you just blurt out 'blahblahblah is he ... you' she'll almost certainly say no, get very upset and/or defensive and block you out of her life ...

*REMEMBER* you do owe it to your friend, or even just a nameless person, to make sure this isn't happening or stop it if it is. It will be VERY hard on the family but it will be better for her. If this continues it's going to destroy her and seriously mess her life up.

What makes it worse is sometimes step dads are a 'totally good father' and then when the girl starts going through puberty all of a sudden 'things change' and the daughter is very torn because as much as she knows she's being abused see also remembers all the time he was a 'good day' and that everybody still thinks he's a 'good dad'

*A BIG HINT WOULD BE* her behavior after he did that. Was she withdrawn the entire night, although even if she wasn't shocked did she seem humiliated or totally 'owned' that he would do this to her into of her family ???

*AND* did the dad seem to 'enjoy' it and was it a power or s*x thing ??? or was he just being a jerk ???

Answer 2

I don't think it's serious. Some families just are goofy and what not. Don't worry unless your friend expresses to you that things are not alright.  

Answer 3

If she wasn't disturbed, then, you shouldn't be either.

Maybe the family knows him, and his antics enough to know when to be worried, and when not to be. Him slapping her on the butt, isn't that unusual. To some men, former sports players its even considered as bonding..  ever watched any Football?

If you're really worried, try asking your friend about it. She'll know him far better than you.

Answer 4

at first i thought he was her real dad but being her step dad makes it much worse cuz i mean that's not normal.. and if I were there, i would have felt totally weird. and the fact that he was drunk does not give the rest of the family a reason to laugh....???

Answer 5

Yes. Defiantly, this is weird you need to notify her  mother. She could be getting molested by her step-father. Ask her about it but not in those exact words (ex.Molest, rape) she could feel uncomfortable. Try to get her to open up to you. This is serious. Even if he was drunk something isn't right. You cannot go on without knowing  the truth.  Please get into  this don't just brush it off.

Answer 6

I find this strange.  But some families like to smack butts.  I don't think you should worry unless your friend tells you if something happened.

Answer 7

Yeah... thats a little strange

Answer 8

yes eww you have perv as a dad

Answer 9

Oh. My. Gosh. Um... I think he was just kidding around with her. I mean, he's her DAD. That would just be gross.

If you aren't too embarrassed to ask, I would double check with her to make sure that she's... I don't know... feeling okay at home.

But nine out ten, I think he was just being Dad and buggin' her.