Weird question, but teenage mothers?

Question

Hi, hope this doesn't offend anyone who is/was a teen mother, but I always find teens having babies really weird. not in a bad way really to be honest. It's just I'm 16 and could never ever imagine being strong enough for a baby. My mums friend's daughter is 15 and the last time i seen her she was about 10, playing with dolls, and now shes due to have her baby anytime, and it's freaked me out.

I just find it amazing that some people can go through with having children at such young ages. I'd just like to hear about some teen mother's experiences about how you coped and what it was like and how you feel about it now. I just find it interesting :), thanks in advance if anyone answers xx

Answer 1

My mother had me when she was 16 and did a fantastic job even if i do say so myself, i have a good well paid Job im 25 and have 1yr old twins, i couldn't imagine having a baby that young but each to their own, if ur 15 or 45 i think its more to do with how u bring the child up and how you have been brought up. I don't like the age things they have where mothers say I'm a better mother cause I'm 45 and have made loads of money or I'm a better mother I'm 16 i can run around and play with my kids, i dont think any of that make you a good mother! I think its a fine line and a balance between the 2 and not the ages

Answer 2

I'm 17 and have a 5month old daughter. When i found out i was pregnant i had only just left school and didn't no what to think but i knew that i couldn't go through with getting rid of my own flesh and blood. Now i have her sometimes i think maybe i should have thought about my decision more carefully cause it is hard work but i wouldn't change her for the world shes the best thing that ever happened to me. Everyone different though some girls have babies cause they think that they will get more money and things like that but you don't well i don't anyway.Some girls are cut out for it  and others are not not and loose it, it just depends on the person as far as i'm concerned.

Answer 3

I could not see myself having a baby at such a young age then have the father leave.(sniffs)! I'd be so hurt.

Answer 4

its so hard.

& you DON'T imagine your self like that. but it happens.

It was very hard to cope. especially when my 2 best friends at that time left me after they found out. but the father was ALWAYS there for me, and i just thank god for that. It was crappy being pregnant. i felt sick & emotional all the time. and it was so annoying that i was always hungry, but then you can never p**p, but pee 24/7. When i look back on it now, it made me a stronger person in so many ways and it taught me a lot, that i don't think i could have learned any other way.  

Answer 5

i cant get my head round it either, im 24 this year and cant see my self ever being ready to have kids!!!

Answer 6

heya I'm a teen mum to be I'm 17 and i used a condom but it split didn't think anything of it (stupid i no) then when i was 3days late i told my mum she went and got me a home test as soon as i did it it came bk to being pregnant i didn't tell the baby's dad till i was 3months gone and when i told him he told me to get rid of my baby and that he didn't want anything to do with her and that he wouldn't give me any money i saved money from birthdays and babysitting so i had abit and my auntie gave me some babythings she had im over 7 months pregnant now and the baby dad made his mind up that he wants to be part of the babys life and so does his family he told his family when i was 6 months pregnant but wot upsets me the most my mum and dad have helped me with everything and now i find it hard that the dad of baby wants to b there i got use to being a single mum i no its going to be hard having a baby but i have a job when my baby is born and cant wait to have her now x

Answer 7

Well, i am 17 yrs old and i am a single teen mother.  my son is about to turn 2 in september.  talking for my self, it is very astonishing seeing a girl your age about to or even having a kid.  I'm my experience, i was a wild teen just looking for fun and unfortunately i was being influenced by ppl that were not right for me.  i was so eager to grow up and feel free that i wasn't paying attention of the consequences that will follow later on in life.  Back 2 yrs ago, it felt very awkward to walk out of my house and realize that i was no longer this teen and now i was a teenage mother.  not only that, i had to raise my son alone bc his father didn't want any part in our lives.  i felt very lonely and disoriented even though i had tons of love coming from my family and my sons paternal grandma.  now looking back i feel like my son was more of a blessing to me.  he saved me from myself because if it wasn't for him, god know where i would stand right now.  i never regreted having my son, but i do regret all my stupid decisions that led me to raising a child while i was a kid myself.

i hope this helps and if you wish to talk to me furhter, feel free to email me.

Answer 8

im 16 and expecting i dont think its that much of a difference...

im just gonna have to do things in a different way and going to school too..i think teen moms are stronger than most moms...

Answer 9

I was once with this guy who i thought really cared for me, cause he looked after me so well, and because i was gullible.

I lost my virginity to that guy. and then my period never came.

Luckily it was just my body getting totally whacked out from the s*x cause i couldn't handle a kid. but that guy dumped me for his ex (who he had been sleeping with the whole time we'd been going out)

i was devastated, and for about 3 weeks i had no idea whether i was pregnant or not because i was too scared to take a test in case it was positive.

in the end my friends bought me two and they were negative...and you know what, i cried. I had gotten so used to the idea that i might be having a kid it broke my heart.but i wouldn't go there again

it has totally put me off s*x!

Answer 10

im 14 and my 15-year-old mate just had a kid, the dad left her && she's in her flat with her mum who's a drunk && their on benifits

that soo teaches me to just use protection coz i dont wanna be stuck with a kid at my age even though i shouldnt do nuthin at my age but hey

Answer 11

I am a teen mum.  I'm 19.  My daughter was planned, she was born in May.

I was in a long-term relationship with my now husband.  We own a house.  Have savings.  My husband works.  I did work, but am now being a stay at home mum.

I have always loved children.  And wanted to have my children young.  I always said that if I got to 30 without having children, then I wouldn't bother.  As personally, for me this would be too old.

I feel I'm strong enough to have a baby and look after my daughter and any future children.

I think you should have children when you're ready.  Personally I think you should be at least 16, considering that's the legal age for s*x (in the UK).  

Answer 12

no, but mi mama got pregnant with me at 16 and had me.

Answer 13

I was a teen mom.  I had grown up raising my younger sibling, even my mother tells everyone that I had more hand in raising her youngest than she did.  So I guess it wasn't a stretch for me to get pregnant young.  Had my daughter when I just turned 17.  My mother was mad at first but within a week she was knitting the baby sweaters...I had support from my family but as much as they wanted to take some of the burden off of me, I wouldn't let them.  It was my baby and I took care of her.  I lived with my mother for 3 weeks after her birth before getting my own place.  

My husband didn't move in with me right away, we didn't want to do something else we might not have been ready for.  He came over and was a father that way.  She was a year old when we decided to move in together, we also had another baby on the way....

We beat the odds, 17 years together now (and married).  Still very much in love.  I think doing it all backwards was good for us.  Not rushing into moving in together was a good strategy.  

I don't recommend it, but it's not the end of the world.  Things can work and be great.

Answer 14

I am 17 and have a 2 1/2 month old son. yes it is ruff but i get through by holding my head up and telling my self i can do anything i set my mind to. Anyways my a*****e of an ex does not want anything to do with his son (left when i found out i was prego). I am currently a senoir this year (YAY me almost there) and i got to college online. I have alot of support from my family which is great they keep me going when i feel like i cant!!! Having a baby has actually changed my life for the better and has made me a stronger person (but this is still no reason to go out and get prego at a young age) My son was not planned he was actually a shock to me because i did  use a condom!!! Every day I look into my sons face and tell myself i can get through any obstical thrown my way and so far i have!!!! Thanx for asking

Answer 15

I'm 17 (almost 18) and I have an 8 month old. Me and my boyfriend are still together and we love our son very much! We are able to financially support our son and do not receive any kind of assistance. I am graduating in 5 months (6 months early) and i'll be going to college or university within the next two years.

I love being a young Mom!  

Answer 16

I was a teenage mom twice. Once at 13, again at 19.

Judge me, everyone, if you wish.

I was going through a terribly low point in my life, rebellious as h**l, and was blaming my parents for their divorce that tore our family to pieces. I was drinking and doing all sorts.

I met a boy, he was 17, at a party. We got chatting and we were so totally out of it.

I just lost control and "things" happened, and 4 weeks later i found out i was pregnant. Callum, the boy, wanted nothing to do with me or the baby, and i dreaded telling my mom.

Even though i knew i was too young and completely un-ready, i couldnt go through with an abortion. Even at 13 i KNEW that i could never kill my own child. I told my mom when i was 6 months pregnant, i wasnt showing too much, and at first she didnt believe me, then she went mental, screaming, shouting, crying, and then she drove off. She came home later that night and refused to talk to me.

She kept this up for a further 2 months or so, until the night i went inot labour, i went running into her room saying "Mom, Mommy, i think the baby's coming" She jumped out of bed, and she pacled a bag full of all the things i'd need, and rushed me round to the hospital. She was so strong and she never left my side. I have never felt closer to my mom than Tristan's birth. I didnt know the s*x of my baby, and hadnt given it much thought, but when the doctor told me i had a little boy, i just held him in my arms and said "Hey Baby i'm your Mommy" then i named him Tristan, as it seemed to suit him.

I knew that i couldnt possibly keep him, but if it is possible for anyone to believe that i loved him, and still do, then please believe it.

It was an open adoption, so when he feels ready, IF he ever feels ready, he can contact me, but i'm not expecting him to. I heard along the line that he's going to University this September, and strangely i felt a sense of pride. But then i felt guilty, as though i had no right to feel that pride.

Then at 19 i had my first Daughter Lola, with a man i'd met shortly after having Tristan and immediately fell in love with.

I am still with my husband and we now have three children: Lola, Finn and Skye, and i'm expecting twin girls in September.

I got my degree in social care, and im a social worker. My life turned out okay, and although i know i was far far too young i dont regret it, it's given me that experience.

I knwo that my son has a great life with loving parents, and has all the opportunities laid out in front of him, im just so glad that soembody could give him that when i couldnt.

X

Answer 17

im 19 years old

i had my son, shane, when i was 15

im still with his daddy, and we're engaged :]

it has been sooooo hard, but i wouldnt change having my son or my fiance for anything :]

now im pregnant again..its gonna be rough but i know we can do it :]

Answer 18

i was a teen mum back in the 90's when i was 17.  I didnt plan to get pregnant, it happened whilst on the mini-pill and when i knew instantly that i wouldnt abort or adopt her, i gave up a decent job that i was offered to raise her (there was not as many parental rights or childcare back then).  Gave birth when i was 18 and had no family to support me as they felt i had shamed the family beyond forgiveness.

Society shunned me, the teachers kept an extra 'vigilant eye' on my daughter with extra unconsented medicals and generally people avoided me.  The father said he was 'too young to cope' and i lived in bedsit land with my child.

Its been one of the most difficult but rewarding journey in my life.  17 years later all the teachers have said what a well balanced, respectful, courteous child to teach, she gained above average grades in her GCSE's and is about to start college.

She has been my rock and i hope i have been her inspiration to do well in her own life.  I never regret a single thing.  However, if i had a choice, i would have wanted to be stable enough in a relationship and home before i chose to have a child as that has been the hardest part for me.

I went on to marry, have another child and work as a bank cashier.  In many ways i find it harder parenting with a partner then i did on my own but i guess thats just cos i learned to be independent and self sufficient!

Im very proud of my daughter and watching her transform into a wonderful (if sometimes moody!) young woman has been the most rewarding.  Seeing her succeed when everyone else abandoned hope. She taught me more about love and life than anyone else ever could.

No parent comes with a fool proof guide book and any parent of any age will have their difficulties.  Anybody at any age can be the greatest parent if their hearts are devoted and they can put themselves in second place.