Were running out of time!

Question

My fiance and I are going around in a circle with planning our wedding. We want a small wedding, idealy like 50 people, and our list just keeps getting bigger and bigger. Its up to about 100 people. We are on a very tight budget, around 5000 at the most. Our problem is that when we find a location, it needs a large deposit to book it. We arent far into the plannin and i am already sick of it. We want to get married next summer and we are running out of time to book a place. We are almost to the point of just going to the court house. I already have my large gown and we want our family to be there. What should we do?

Answer 1

First, calm down. You need to prioritize what you want most from your wedding and then concentrate your money and planning time on those things. If you have a budget then do a little research to find out what things realistically cost. Then divide and conqur. Give some friends each a task to find you what you want for the money you have. Make sure you have at least two friends on each task so it has a better chance of getting done. This allows your friends to get involved and takes some of the load off of you. Finally, try very hard to stay on your budget but cut yourself a little slack if you go over. The most important thing is to enjoy the day and the life you start together.

Answer 2

Relax.  It is hard to plan a wedding but you will get through it.  If you want to keep it small then don't book an expensive place.  $5,000 isn't a lot of money so you need to keep it simple.  Just invite the 50 most import people and don't let any family influence your decision.  It is your wedding.  Not theirs.  My mother in law kept adding to our list and I finally had to tell her to stop it.  She wanted to invite business associates that I had never even met.  I wanted people at my wedding who I knew and who meant a lot to me.  You should be having both your parents of course, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends.  If anyone is offended for not being invited just tell them that you are keeping it small.  I would rent out a hall and have it catered if you want to keep costs low.  You could even have an outdoor wedding.  Don't elope or go to the courthouse because you will regret it down the road.  Just relax and do it how you want to do it.

Answer 3

How about an outdoor/picnic reception. You could get married in a court house first if you like with just very close family and friends and then have a big reception in a park or similar. If money is tight and you still want to invite everyone, how about getting everyone to bring a food dish to share to the picnic (or just close fafmily and friends, depending on whether anyone would be offended...you never know, some people are daft like that!).

Good luck and chill! It'll be a fab day, try not to stress!

Answer 4

I agree with Gregory - first thing you need to do is sit down and breath! You're looking at the wedding as being all about the event. What you should be thinking about is the marriage. Look at the bigger picture! One year is a *long* time to plan a wedding. I've been to two gorgeous weddings this year that were both planned in less than 6 months and had over 100 guests. You have lots of time. Also, my best friend got married with 120 guests and her total cost ended up being just under $5,000. It's completely possible.

Split up duties and ask friends and family to help. If you want to keep the guest list small, cut out any "___ plus guest" and just invite the person you know. Don't invite any bf/gf unless you're friends with them as well, or if they're engaged or married. First, write down the essential people - parents, siblings and grandparents. Then, add extended family who must be there. If you don't know Cousin Bob that well or haven't seen Cousin Mary since you were 2, don't invite them. Then, decide on a certain number of friends you each want to invite and write them down. If inviting one person and not another means problems will arise, then don't invite that first person. Or better yet, keep it to family-only. (We're inviting immediate family, his grandparents, my aunt/uncle, and two friends each.)

Now all that said... if you're this stressed out with still a year to go, why not book a small, family-only ceremony somewhere nearby. Get an officiant to marry you. Then, plan a get-together at your house for the weekend after for your friends if you want something like that. There's no reason to stress yourself out about an event and if you are, then you need to change what you're doing.

Answer 5

You need to ask yourself how important a wedding with the trimmings is (even a small one). If you go to the courthouse, will you regret that you didnt get your *day* later? A lot of brides would (and do, judging by the growing popularity of do-overs), but not all.

If you might regret that, I urge you to stick it out but cut your guest list down to a much more manageable size, family and your best friends only. You could consider using a restaurant as your reception location. 5000 is enough to have a lovely wedding, but as you indicated, money would become a point of stress as the guest list increases.

Answer 6

Find out what is most important to you.  That is what will make the day perfect.  

If you want your family and friends to be there to celebrate your day, then it can be done on that budget.  Check out if there are park district locations or church basements that can be used for the wedding and reception.  Do a simple food buffet (roasted chicken, mashed potatoes, grilled veggies, pasta, salad, bread).  Try an off day or time like a weekday night or Sunday.

If you want a dream location, then you have to cut back on your guest list (just immediate family and very close friends).

Remember, what makes a wedding perfect is if at the end of the day, you are married.  Everything else is extra.

Answer 7

A State Park would be the PERFECT place in this situation.

Not expensive, you could have the ceremony/reception inside or outside, use their shelter houses, etc.  Some have lodges where guests could stay if necessary...and always BEAUTIFUL surroundings!

Some have beautiful restaurants...etc...

Plus usually more than one scenic place to have the ceremony, so chances are that you wouldn't conflict with anyone else's reservation.

Check out the state parks in your area!  Contact your state's department of natural resources to find out where they all are and what amenities are available.

Answer 8

Go to my website www.belenchiaweddings.com, and give me a call or email me. I will help you out the best I can with things over the phone and through email. At no charge...Congratulations and relax. This is one of the best times of your life believe it or not.

Answer 9

I don't know where you are located but in australia, you can get married for free at a nice park. Even if you need a permit to use the park, it shouldn't cost too much. A cocktail party reception is a great way of cutting costs too. You can just do finger food rather than a sit down formal dinner. If your family and friends don't mind pitching in, everyone could make a nice tray of food and you might not even need a caterer. Try using www.ebay.com for things like wedding bubbles, gifts for your guests, and other smaller things you need. I'm getting married in Nov and have saved heaps of money with ebay. If you know anyone who is good at baking, why not ask them to make your cake for a fraction of the price? My husbands friend is a chef and is making our wedding cake as his present to us. Flowers are expensive, so why not use ribbon and floating candles as decorative pieces.Then all you will need is your bouquet. They are just as effective and can be picked up cheap. Do your hair and make up yourself or get a friend to do it for you. If you can't find a photographer in budget, why not buy a few disposible cameras and ask the guests to capture your special moments? Another thing is invitations...I was quoted $400 and up for 50 invitations and I have done them all myself for about $60! It was time consuming but really easy and affordable. Some of the best weddings I've been to are the smaller intimate ones that have been on a strict budget. There really are lots of ways to cut costs. You just have to be a bit creative. Congrats and I hope you have a lovely wedding.

Answer 10

Have your wedding in either your back yard or someones back yard... it's cheap because it's free and garden weddings are beautiful and elegant!