Were your parents much older than usual ? Was that hard for you ?

Question

Ever since I can remember, my parents were too old to keep up with me . Their attitude was always "Why go out and have fun when we can stay home ?" . They griped and complained every time I wanted to go to the movies, or to another town . I didn't like that, and I swore I'd never put my children through that . NOW -- if your parents are older than most, what kind of an experience was that for you ? Did your parents push themselves to keep up with you, or did you have to have to sacrifice so your parents could take it slow and easy ? Did your parents gripe and complain whenever you wanted to have fun ? Was having older parents a good or a bad experience for you ? Do you think it's okay for parents to be old ? Are there any difficulties with having older parents that I didn't mention ?

Answer 1

I know young parents who gripe and complain about taking their kids places or doing things.  I know older parents who are fine with that.   I think it's fine for older people to have children if they can have children and are ready to take care of those children.   I suppose one more "difficulty" you didn't mention is that if the parents are very old then they have a greater risk of dying and therefore leaving their children orphaned and under state care.

Answer 2

Yes, they were older then usual. It wasn't a BIG problem.  

Answer 3

I had very young parents and loved it!! I remember being a kid and my mom doing cartwheels, splits, toe touches with my friends and I. My parents always wanted to get out and go do something fun. I also lived with my grandparents after my parents divorce. I also had fun with my grandparents. I went on vacations with them and everything. Of course they were kinda young for grandparents. I guess I have kinda had both sides and since I was a child I swore I would be a young mom and I was. I  want to be able to do more fun things with my children that most older people probably wouldn't do. I do not regret my decision one bit. I know that not only will I live to see my grandchildren but I will most likely be around for  a while with my great-grandchildren! My entire family were pretty young mothers and my son had a great relationship with his great-great-grandma until she passed. I just want to have the same with my grandkids, great grandkids, and hopefully my great-great grandkids!!

Answer 4

My Dad was 38 and my Mother was 32 when they started our family, and they were 44 and 38 when they had their last child. I have only happy memories of my childhood.  They were both in great physical shape and took us out all the time. We went on long trips around the country - mostly driving and camping out.  Because they were mature, they never felt trapped by parenthood or resented what they had to give up in order to have a family.  I know this is true, because my mother told me this.  I can recall a couple of times when my Dad's gray hair caused someone to mistake him for our grandfather. That was slightly embarrassing for us kids, but we got over it!

My only regret about having older parents was that they didn't get to fully enjoy their grandchildren, and I didn't have a lot of support from my mother during my childbearing years.  My father died before I ever had kids; my mother spent 7 years fighting Parkinson's Disease at the end of her life and was unable to do much grandmothering.  But there are always trade-offs like that.  I think their attitudes and behavior as my parents gave me the foundation I needed to be a good mother.  

Answer 5

I think it is selfish of older people to have children. My parents where 48 (my dad, who passed away when I was 5) & 50 (my mom) when they adopted me. My issues where never about my mother ability to "keep up with me" because by sisters had children my age so I did things with them & my mom would hang out with my sisters. Or I would take my friends if I wanted to do something.

My problem was when I should have been starting my life (i.e. going away to college, moving out on my own, moving for better employment opportunities) I was keeping track of my mothers retirement, making sure she kept herself healthy and dealing with all of the things I would have dealt with at a later stage in life had my mother not been so old.