What's the funniest golf story you have heard?

Question

Once upon a time I was swinging my driver to warm up on the first tee, on one of the swings I swung back down and my driver wasn't in my hands. It went flying back and nearly hit someone in the eating area of the clubhouse. I didn't think it was funny but the people who I was playing golf with did.

Answer 1

Not completely golf related, but my son who is two loves golf entirely too much. He watches the golf channel all day when we are at home.

He can barely talk but if someone misses a putt, he says "d**n, missed!" and when someone makes a putt he does this crazy scream and victory dance. Its so awesome. I can't get him to stop saying d**n though.

Answer 2

I have a few...

There was once at the driving range...similar to you only the head broke off and went flying about 75 yrds out.  I didn't know what to do, it was a my big bertha.  I was going to leave it then my friend stopped every one on the range...about 30 people so that I could go out and find it.  About 7 people came up to me and suggested places to get fixed.

Another time I was trying to hit over a water hazard and there were cranes just in front of it.  All I could think about was not hitting one...sure enough a ground ball straight into one.  He took off flying and his leg just kind of hung there.  He couldn't land, poor thing.

The old ball into the tree and back in to your own balls.  Seen this happen twice, friend hit a tree and got wacked in the head pretty hard on the return...pissed off he hit the ball again and right back into his sack.

The stories go on and on...the more you play the more stories there are.

Answer 3

wow ur not too good lol thats pretty funny tho

Answer 4

So there was these new kids coming to take lessons. My coach was trying to teach them what not to do when you swing a club. He said that you have to have a good grip on it and don't let go when you swing. He was also demonstrating that. When he did, the new girl's brand new club fell out of his hands and landed into the water. The water is polluted and I highly doubt someone would actually get the club. Instead, I think he is going to buy a new one...well, that is what he is telling her (this happened a couple weeks ago and I think that this Saturday he is going to buy one)

Here is another one that I actually did:

I was hitting my driver and took a huge swing. Since I am near-sighted and don't wear my glasses when I golf, I didn't see where my ball went. My coach started to laugh and I asked him where it went. He said that it went between the branches of a palm tree--I live in Hawaii--and hit a bird in the head! I was really shocked...

Answer 5

I was having a chipping comp with my friends and one of them air swung his chip No joke!

(P.S. Mouse that was Luke!)

(she plays of 2 so she's not a r****d who can't hold a club!)

Answer 6

When i finished my round( I rode a electric golf buggie) I forgot to put my driver cover on after and i thought didn't unstrap my golf bag so i shook the buggie and my golf bag fell on the ground. So my driver broke in half =]

sadd story.. but why am i laughing? lol

so i had to get a new one.haaaaaa.... lol

x*x

EL represent!

Answer 7

Well, this may not be a true story but...

One day an Irishman who had been stranded on a deserted island for

over 10 years, saw a speck on the horizon. He thought to himself, 'It's

certainly not a ship.' And, as the speck got closer and closer, he began

to rule out the possibilities of a small boat or even a raft.

Suddenly there emerged from the surf a wet-suited black clad figure. Putting aside the

scuba gear and the top of the wet suit, there stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde!

The glamorous blonde strode up to the stunned Irishman and said to him, 'Tell

me, how long has it been since you've had a cigarette?'

Ten years,' replied the amazed Irishman. With that, she reached over and

un-zipped a waterproofed pocket on the left sleeve of her wet suit, and

pulled out a fresh pack of cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, and takes a

long drag. 'Faith and begorra,'said the man, 'that is so good

I'd almost forgotten how great a smoke can be!'

And how long has it been since you've had a drop of good Irish whiskey'

asked the blonde. Trembling, the cast-away replied, 'Ten years.' Hearing that, the blonde reaches over to her right sleeve un-zips a pocket there and removes a flask and

hands it to him. He opened the flask and took a long drink.

'Tis nectar of the gods!' stated the Irishman.

'Tis truly fantastic!!! '

At this point the gorgeous blonde started to slowly un-zip the long front of

her wet suit, right down the middle She looked at the trembling man and asked,

'And how long has it been since you played around?'

With tears in his eyes, the Irishman fell to his knees and sobbed

"Sweet Jesus!   Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there?"   .