What's up with this reasoning from women?

Question

I've gotten into a lot of discussions with various women in my life concerning different issues going on in their lives and my own and i get the "you just don't understand" response almost always. My question is- what is it that i don't understand? I consider myself level headed, logical and analytical; so why when i connect the dots (A +B = C) that somehow I'm being a "man" and don't get it.

ex: female friend cheated on her b/f and had s*x with another guy, her b/f was out with buddies one night and kissed some girl and felt guilty and confessed to her- she subsequently tore him a new one and he felt like sh*t- yet her infidelity never showed its head and when i brought that up to her and asked her to lay off him a little another friend (girl) said "who's side are you on?!"

Answer 1

Well, in that particular instance, I think the "You just don't understand" response is being...well, misused.  But there are tons of times where you really would need to have been there or gone through the situation to understand it yourself.

Answer 2

Trying to use logic and being stonewalled is not exclusive to any gender.  Women could easily turn around and say that us men do not use emotions enough in our thinking.  First and hardest thing to do when debating is EXPLAINING YOUR PREMISES.

Answer 3

First things first, stop putting all women into the same category as the women you personally know. Not all of us agree with the actions of every woman that most of you talk about here.

Second, this girl was more than likely looking for a reason to cheat anyway. Most people who're in relationships that they're not happy in (But don't want to break it off on t heir own) look for little things such as the one mentioned to "step out" on the one's they're in the relationship with. I'm pretty sure it was already on her mind to cheat, she was just waiting for the "reason" to do so. And most women only nag when they're not happy. So if your woman is always nagging you then that means you're not handling business as you should (a happy woman has nothing to complain about).

And who knows why the other girl asked you "who's side are you on?" You'll have to ask her that because we can't answer that for you (we don't read minds so we don't know what she was thinking).

Last, everyone can put two and two together and get four. It's just some people chose not to analyze a situation the same as others. People (men and women) can look at the same problem and find different solutions. It doesn't make anyone any smarter (or better) than the other, it just means that we're not going to see the same situation the same way. I've seen some men in my life do some stupid S**t, and I'm pretty sure you have too. So you can't generalize and say that all women can't "connect the dots", because I can say the same thing about all men (but that statement would be false). Maybe you should stop hanging out with sleazy women.

Edit: What does this have to do with feminist? Why everyone does chose the cop out and blame feminist for everything that an individual woman does? She made the choice to cheat; feminist didn’t tell her to do that!

Answer 4

I just shake my head and walk away.

Answer 5

Dosent matter what gender it is cheating is cheating why put that guy through that when you have to set him free by telling him the truth even if it is your female friend

Answer 6

Because feminist think it's ok to mistreat men. As long as they are not getting mistreated.

Answer 7

She f'd another guy and then tore her bf apart for kissing another girl? And you let this occur without telling him? First, you need to do the right thing, second, you don't need friends like her. If she has such low moral standards then she won't be much of a friend in the long run.

Answer 8

SOME women argue emotionally. While USUALLY men argue logically, "X must be Y because of Z.." a women might say "X is Y because it is!", "because I know so..." and your classic "you just don't understand.

Not always the case, but this is what I have picked up.

I will never understand why women like shopping and g*y guys that they will obviously never get.

Answer 9

It's the ole girls network; you don't have periods and you don't give birth...hence you are not one of them...and can't possibly understand them.  

Women have privileges men don't.  

Humans adjust their sights to be "right."

Answer 10

Women just want to whine male friend's ears off.

They are expecting you to think they do no wrong and that they deserve the world.

If you don't agree with them they'll feel betrayed.

Go tell her boyfriend that she cheating on him MUHAHAHA

Answer 11

You don't understand probably means that as a male being, you can't possibly understand. She's just using you to get something off her chest, she's not looking for a lecture or advice. Letion had it right with his comparison about racial differences. You won't understand because you are socialzed differently, have completely different life experiences based on your gender ( I mean more to do with expectations and roles than biological stuff), and certainly haven't had her particular experiences.

Answer 12

Yep been there and done that.

Consider this,

Analytical reasoning

Emotional reasoning

Now a third model, combining them ....

Answer 13

Trite statement.

It means nothing, not because it's improperly used but because it's been overused and makes false assumptions.

Anyone who uses that statement is probably struggling to justify their views to themselves

Answer 14

I've never cheated on someone with whom I've been in a relationship, so sorry, I can't answer this question from my point of view. But I am curious as to why you think the behavior of one woman represents the behavior of all women.

As for the logical versus emotional reasoning, it's actually more like this, QOSBen.

Men tend to think "X must be Y because of Z," and women tend to think "X must be Y because of A, B, C, D, E, etc.... Z." That is a very simple way of putting it, but what it means to be a logical, linear thinker means you think in that simple "X must be Y because of Z," which looks like a straight line, whereas you can imagine the woman's emotional thought of "X must be Y because of A, B, C, etc..." as a large web of thought. Being a logical thinker does not mean you are more capable of arriving at a correct answer. I can logically argue the moon is made out of cheese and that there are thousands of invisible dancing fairies in your backyard. And being an emotional thinker does not mean you lack any sort of reasoning and make decisions and justify things "just because."

Basically, men think women over complicate things and women think men over simplify things.

Answer 15

There's a problem with your question.

"What's up with this reasoning from women?"

It should say:

"What's up with this reasoning from A womAn?"

One silly woman does not make all women illogical.  What she really means to say is that you are bothering her and she doesn't have the time or inclination to explain.

Answer 16

Why a woman says "You don't understand", she really means that she is angry at you for not giving her what she wants.

Women are spoiled to the core. They truly believe that whatever their opinion is, everyone (particularly men) should bow to them.

Answer 17

What she was probably trying to say is not, You don't understand the issue, but rather, You don't understand what I'm experiencing.

She was probably looking for some support, not a logical explanation. Women are logical rational beings and capable of sorting out the situation rationally ourselves. She didn't need you to figure it out for her or fix it. She just needed someone who would stick up for her and be like, I totally understand what you're going through.

She wasn't asking you to connect the dots for her, she can do that herself. She just wanted validation. Next time, be a bit more sensitive and understanding and it won't be an issue! She probably just wanted to know that someone cares about what she's going through.

Next time, instead of trying to figure out the issue, try to be more compassionate towards her. A little compassion can go a long way.

Answer 18

HUMAN BEINGS ARE ALSO EMOTIONAL. And unless you are a black woman you can't say you understand black women and unless you are 80 years old you can't say you understand very old people. It's just life I just don't understand why white men or men in general always feel the need to say that they understand things that they have never experienced. It is very agitating to criticize something or make rules about a group of people that you don't fully understand.

For example when white people ask why black people are still going on about slavery because it happened 100 years ago. When white people make comments like these I fell like setting up a meeting with them so I can knock their teeth down their throat. I hate when men say that women or feminists don't respect them or that our lives are not as bad as a man's life. Absolute bullshit. I can't talk about something I don't fully understand therefore I try my best not to, other people should follow my example.

Answer 19

who said women were logical?