What's your definition of "spoiling" your partner?

Question

When Rio asked her question, I immediately thought of someone buying me lots of materialistic things and treating me like a little girl...a little girl that can't wait to get a barbie doll or something, lol.

But after reading the other replies in her question, it seems like some people had a different idea of what spoiling is.....What would you consider it? Just hugging your partner frequently and texting them "I miss you hun?" Giving them a massage? Going on vacations a lot?

Answer 1

Spoiling isn't really something you do to someone, but something that they do.  Here's what I mean:  I might come home from work and cook dinner, do the dishes, do the laundry, do the homework with the kids, play with them, give them a bath, give my wife a massage and rub her feet, cuddle her through a movie, and listen to her talk about everything on her chest for an hour and a half before we go to sleep.  I am by no means spoiling her by doing this.  If these things, however, become expectations that she takes for granted, rather than gifts that she is thankful for she is choosing to be spoiled.  It may be wise to demonstrate that this expectation need not be fulfilled (though that can admittedly be a battle I don't feel like having).  So you can't spoil your partner, it's something he/she chooses to do.  You can choose to cut off the gift that your partner is taking for granted however.  There is a wall men often run into though, which is that women are being taught on television and a lot of the "self help" books out there these days that these expectations are indeed their "rights," and any man who chooses not to fulfill them is controlling and less than a man.  Many women will file divorces over this, and the courts will likely award them custody of the children.  These sorts of teachings encourage women to choose to be spoiled...though neither gender has patent rights on it.

Answer 2

That was what I meant by spoiling; I didn't mean attention, compliments, physical intimacy, or other intangibles.

Answer 3

I didnt see the other question, but in my dictionary, it means everything that will make her feel like shes The Princess with whatever means I could afford, to get it, if thats what it takes.

To answer your question - spoiling = doing everything to make her feel special/like a princess/goddess, until shes addicted to your attentions and feels theres no way she could live without you. Its possible. I would know...done it many times, with immense success. :-D

Answer 4

I dunno.. I guess it's what connotations you attach to the word "spoiling". Is it spoiling someone by calling them once a day? Relatively positive I think..  Or is it only spoiling them if you're there to cater to their every whim.. negative connotations

edit: yea I think because its generally accepted that it has negative connotations attached it should be something like catering too much to their whims

Answer 5

waiting on them hand and foot

Answer 6

lol...damsel...seems like im the only one who saw your qn as rio's.

Well my idea of him spoiling me is him treating me royally...like a princess that is. And I don't want it all the time. But I like to be pampered like that once in a while. Because it revitalizes me completely.