What Do I Do If I Ground My 17 Year Old Daughter And She Leaves Anyway?

Question

What are my options? I need help.

Answer 1

Oh your daughter sounds EXACTLY like my 17 yr old sister. Here's what my mom did:

Take away cell phone, deny any allowance\money, take away car keys, don't drive her anywhere fun... basically just take away every privledge you can.

The way my mother put it was "If you want to live in this house with the perks, you take the responsibility along with it". You can't eat, sleep, and use resources in the house and then leave when you please and ignore the rules.

If it gets really bad, threaten to kick her out when she's 18... that will get her attention. Most 18 year olds can't support themselves w\o their parents... see how that makes her feel. Maybe she will learn to be grateful for all you've done for her and stop defying you.

Answer 2

she is too old to be grounded. next year she will be an adult and she can do what she wants - you need to give her freedom.  

Answer 3

call the police and have them bring her back. other than that you could go physically bring her home, but i think police would have less of a struggle.... they do that kind of thing all the time. Teens are hard to deal with sometimes (i was horrible to my mother)

Answer 4

Sit her down and give her a good talking to.  Let her know you mean business.  And then start taking things away.... her phone, tv, mp3 player... whatever she prizes.  Take it away.  

It sounds like she doesn't respect you enough.  You need to reclaim that respect!  She needs to know you are the Mom and she HAS no choice but to listen to you.  You provide her shelter, feed her, and clothe her.   And she is going to respect you.  Be Strong, Unwavering...Firm.  

I'm not judging, I've got a 9 year old son I've had assert my position as Mom with.  

Answer 5

I did this at 13. My mom came in her pajamas, no bra, and pink fuzzy slippers to a party to come get me. She then called the cops and made everyone stay there until they arrived. almost everyone got charged with under aged drinking. I was so embarrassed. I lost every privilege possible. My mom even made me work so many hours a day before I was allowed to shower or eat their food. She called it restitution, I called it prison. It worked though. Now I'm a lot more respectful of my moms house and rules. Even though I'm 19 I'm very conscienceious about it when I go home.

Answer 6

you can go look for her and go find her and tell her she needs to go NOW or call the police

Answer 7

I'll tell you from the perspective of someone who was that age 3 years ago and remembers it all only too freshly lol!

I went through this phase, and the only way my parents got around it was to take away my privelages when I broke the grounding. If your daughter has an allowance, stop that for a month. If she has a car, take the keys for a month. I didn't have an allowance or a car but my parents used to take the TV out of my room and block my access onto the family computer as I didn't have a laptop at the time. I'm sure if you get creative you'll be able to think of something that is important enough to her that the threat of taking it away will be enough to keep her to her grounding!

When I was about her age though, maybe 18, I must admit it did get harder for my parents to ground me as when it happened I tended to go to stay with friends where I could have as much TV and internet as I wanted so it must have been a nightmare for them! Hope this isn't the case for you! But, if it is, if it's any consolation I'm only 20 now and all that stuff is long in the past, I get on ok with my parents now and we still live together, I had a baby which yes did mature me a lot but I think even without, she'll mature naturally in the next 2 or 3 years and this will all hopefully be a thing of the past!