What??? The teacher said that my son is considered Handicaped!?

Question

He is Autistic and is Doing so well! But had a parent coference and well he still will need to be in a Special Education Class. Through high school!

I really .... thought he would grow out of this!

I'm.... well So well u can say I was in denial of him

And his disability I thought he was so ...OK?

I'm so speechless But I knew that not to treat him any different than others!

Hes 9 now and will be going to MIDDLE SCHOOL! in like 2 years

And I cant.... Even believe hes growing up!? :() WOW!

ANYBODY HAVE EXPERIANCES?

NO* RUDE*COMMETS******

Answer 1

The word "Handicapped" is such an emotionally charged word and is often meaningless. People with glasses could be called "handicapped". My daughter has mild Cerebral palsy, so she's "handicapped", but her IQ is 115 and she's doing fine in school, she just falls down more often than other kids and get therapy to help her walk and run better! It would be great if we could remove certain words from our language, like handicapped, retarded, etc. But some insensitive people still use them. Autism is a developmental disability, which falls into a spectrum from nearly normal to very impaired. Where your son falls is hard to say. Don't let insensitive people rattle you. You know your son. Support him as much as you can. Enjoy watching him grow and develop and love him for who he is nd who he i becoming.

Autism never goes away, but kids can learn to cope with it!!

Answer 2

That was extremely rude and unnecessary for the teacher to say something like that. Don't be afraid the middle school experience! :)

Middle school will be a great experience for him. I had a friend whose brother was Autistic and he's doing great, and achieving everything so well!

They grow up too fast, don't they?

Answer 3

I am so sorry to hear that his teacher said that. All through school I was diagonsed as Learning Disabled. I had to learn not to let that get me. So, I showed the teachers that I had many abilities. In high school I became highly involved. I held offices of my sophmore, junior, and senior classes. Got involved in the performances as well as many clubs. I was even on Homecoming Court. I am now a dancer/dance teacher and just got married on September 29, 2007 and have accomplished so much. I am so proud of myself.

Your son is going to surprise you and all his teachers. He is excatly like any other child and does not need to be treated different because of his differences. Remember, everyone is different so we all should be treated the same. His teacher should have known better and spoke to you in a more understandable way. He will succeed!!!

Answer 4

I have two with diagnosed autism.

Autism is considered a handicap. The way the brain works is completely different, and even if children learn to cope and act like typical people, it's like learning french when your native language is english, it's a learned behavior, not who they truly are.

It's great that you treat him like any other child, but the truth is that he will probably need special help in school. You are definitely needed to keep the school honest so to speak. In our home, that meant that I pushed them to provide the supports for things they need more help with, and yet still push them as far as possible to learn academic and social necessities. It's not a bad thing to need special ed classes, however, if you think he could function and learn in regular ed classes, call and IEP meeting and request that....ask for the testing and also for a prior written notice that they won't serve him in the least restrictive environment. My daughter is quite severe and still spent most of her day in a reged class with an aide.

My two are ten and twelve. I know what you mean about growing up.

Answer 5

This was not the teacher's place to say that. She should have been more sensitive.

I have worked with Autistic children. He'll be fine, with the support of the Special Education, He'll be fine. With your support, He will be OK.

Some people like the labels because they are afraid, because they want us all to be the same. it is convenient, but we are not the same. This is why we have beauty in the the world, because we are not the same.

Your son's teacher is not able to see beauty in something that is different because she is afraid of it.

but let me comfort you. Research has shown that for children living in "Kibbutz" (communal living) where the kids stayed outside home, since birth and mum and dad came to see them in the morning and in the evening, about 2 hours a day and most of the day with their carers and friends. when they examined those kids perception, they found out that for them mum and dad were the most important people in their life.

you are the most important person in your son's life. find the magic in him until he finds it in himself. teachers come and go, you stay there forever. ( and I'm a teacher- I'm also a mum for 3 children)

Be strong and brave and never let her say that to him.

Ronit Baras

http://www.behappyinlife.com/parentcoach...

Answer 6

LOL bff rose, fking hilarious!

Answer 7

It sounds like you are sad and scared and upset all at once.  It also sounds as if you had hoped your child would progress to the point of being able to go back to traditional school and live a typical life.  I know from first hand experience it can be hard to realize that may not be the case.  Know that autism is a complex issue..that even the kids on the higher functioning end of the scale may not be able to function well in a traditional class.  He will learn and grow and lead a fufilling life..it just may be different from what we had thought and hoped it would.

It was terrifying for me when I realized my son was on the edge of puberty.  All those issues that are tough to handle in "Normal" boys can seem harder with kids on the spectrum.  There are some wonderful books out there that talk about adolescence and autism...email me if you would like the title.  It can also be overwhelming because it means we need to start planning for the next educational step...sometimes that means middle school, sometimes a transitional program geared towards vocational and life skills.  Take a deep breath, let yourself have all those feelings, cry and scream if you need to...it is all ok and normal.  Then sit back and look at all your son has accomplished.  I am sure there are things he does today you never thought he would do.  Look at the class he is in, the teachers he works with.  While her comments were undoubtedly crass and insensitive, has your son done well in the program?  Is he happy? Are you happy with what you see?  Now think about high school...how you felt, the good and the bad.  Do you feel your son can be happy and have his needs met in that setting?  If you honestly feel that deep down he can succeed in that setting, than fight to get it.  If, after you think about it, you feel that maybe he needs a smaller setting, or more time to work on some things before considering it, than follow the path you are on now.  

Many parents think and hope thier kids will "outgrow" autism.  We see stories on TV about kids who have use this techinque or that plan and have done well, the autistic symptomology becomes almost unnoticeable.  What most programs or books about these instances don't say is that for the majority of kids on the spectrum, these miracles don't happen.  And even then, those kids are still autistic.  There is no cure,nothing to make it go away.  And that can be heartbreaking at times.  Just about every special needs parent I have even known will admit that at one point or another, even just for a moment, they wished, wondered, hoped for the "normal" life they had dreamed of when they first found out they were having a baby.  You love your son...you will do all it takes to see he is in the best place possible.  Allow yourself to grieve but know that you are not alone.

Answer 8

idk my bff rose

Answer 9

they should let him decide

Answer 10

Actually, the term "handicapped" means physically or mentally disabled and so probably shouldn't be applied to your son. The correct term is Autistic Spectrum Disorder or ASD, which probably doesn't make you feel any better!

Your son may have high functioning ASD, which makes for a bright future for him, regardless if he remains in special education or not. However, he may need extra support, even if he is in general education. Children with ASD often have sensory and social issues that need to be addressed with special training and accommodations.

Also, an important part of being in special ed is that he can receive test accommodations on state wide and standardized testing. Make sure this is in his IEP.

Special education takes many forms from going to a special class to being almost independent in general education. If your son is currently in a special class, but is doing grade level work in one of two subjects, you should urge the school to mainstream him into general education classes for these subjects. Then he is on his way towards getting into all general education classes.

Just because he is in special education does not mean he is trapped in a special class for his entire school career. There are many benefits to special education, not the least of which, is that he can take his IEP to any college or university and they have to give him the same accommodations that are listed on his IEP.

I suggest you read Temple Grandin's book, "Thinking in Pictures." This will help explain ASD to you and the author has a PhD and is also autistic.