What amount of PDA do you think is appropriate in front of the children?

Question

My hubby and I aren't really in agreement about this topic. He thinks it is fine to french kiss and modestly grope each other in front of the kids. I think we should just keep it simple (hand holding, pecking, hugging) Where do you draw the line and why? Hubby thinks it's healthy for the kids to see that we still love each other and I'm afraid they are going to try what they see. Please help, any advice is appreciated.

Answer 1

French in front of the kids? Jesus.

I think hand holding, pecking and hugging in front of your children is really cute. Shows them that it's normal and okay to show affection to the person you love.

Answer 2

Your children should see that you guys love each other but they shouldn't see too much, like groping! kissing and hugging would suffice but if your children are old enough ask them if they feel uncomfortable.

Answer 3

You are more right. Of course they need to see you two being close and loving, but leave more intimacy for private times. No, I'm not a prude -- but I also have a 'joking' husband who sometimes would like to see how much he can get away with bugging me with our son in the room!  

Answer 4

i never really liked watching my parents do more than a kiss

i think the rest is kinda disgusting :(

Answer 5

This is kind of tough because there are pros and cons to each. Personally, I agree with your husband. Especially nowadays, kids aren't seeing their parents affectionate enough I think. My husband and I kiss and touch all the time in front of our son, and have found that now when we kiss each other, our son comes walking over and wants a kiss from each of us as well. I think kids should be taught where to draw the line. Teach them that because you are married, that kind of behavior is okay, and that you are just showing how much you love each other. Kids are smarter than we give them credit for, and I think with a little explaining and a lot of affection with them as well,they will learn what is appropriate. I'm sure your husband and you aren't going at it in front of them...kissing and touching is a great thing to show your kids. Show them you love eachother!

Again, this is just how I feel and how my husband and I are in our house.  

Answer 6

Think of your parents, what all would you want to see? We want to see our parents love each other, hand holding, pecking, hugging, even just long looks w/ a smile, but we do not want to think of them as 'sexual creatures'. I have read where someone said there are two kinds of people who never have s*x, your kids or your parents.

Answer 7

I'd have to say it's something you both have to weigh up.

I grew up in a house were my parents didn't even hold hands walking down the street ... love, s*x and public affection where frowned upon by my father. It took me a very long time to become comfortable with my sexuality and thus to start openly showing an interest in girls. In saying that, when I finally did get a girlfriend she was the one and we're happily married and awaiting the birth of our first child. So I'm not unhappy about the way I was brought up at all.

I'd 'personally' agree with you in that there is no need to french kiss and grope in front of the kids. They are going to see more than enough of that as they get older and start watching more TV and going out.

I wouldn't be as extreme as my father was but I think there is a line. I think it's important to show the kids love and that can be done in more ways than french kissing and groping. But where the line lies will really depend on what you and your hubby feel is appropriate for your style of parenting.

Answer 8

Its been proven that children who see their parents kiss (just a peck) at least once every day helps build their self esteem... i think anything more than kissing, holding hands etc. is a little to much for a child to witness from their parents.

Answer 9

Hand holding, pecking, hugging, a friendly swat on the butt, and snuggling is all we do in front of children. Anything else belongs behind closed bedroom doors. It isnt cute or appropriate for others to have to watch people groping each other and making out.

EDIT: Guys the "is all we do in front of the children" part means as in we wouldnt do more than that. Not that we constantly do it.

Answer 10

My husband and I battle on the topic of PDA all the time. I am a very affectionate person and he isn't at all. Growing up I saw my parents holding hands, kissing, whispering in each others ears all the time. My mom would sit on my dads lap and they were very open when we had questions. Me and my sister would always giggle when we saw my dad grab her butt or breast and she would get really red and say something like "good to know you still find me attractive." My husband was very young when his parents were divorced and he has never seen either one of them being affectionate towards anybody. He was very slow to mature and has always had confidence issues when it comes to dealing with the opposite s*x. He doesn't like to even hug me when there are people around and when we first started dating was extremely shy when it came to kissing or cuddling with me. He says he has never had a good example of a couple loving each other and so I have had to literally teach him that it is ok. So I would definitely suggest that witnessing some sort of affection is crucial to a child's emotional and sexual growth. They are going to see it on TV anyways and you might as well be the first and best example.

Answer 11

I agree with you.  Keep it simple around the kids.  Anything else is too much!  They will thank you for it later!

Answer 12

Personally, my husband and I think it's important to show affection for each other in front of our children; we believe it's important for them to see how healthy, normal adults interact.

However, we draw the line at groping and tongue down the throat. An affectionate deep kiss doesn't have to be grotesque. Patting each other on the behind is also fine, but fondling genitals and b*****s---nuh uh.

I can see your concern, actually, in how a young child might misinterpret these things in how they relate to their peers. However, my children have always known the difference between different levels of personal relationships.