What are appropriate chores?

Question

I have a 4 year old girl and a 20 month old girl what are appropriate chores for them. And how can I make them want to do it currently me or my hubby do everything and I know for a fact the 4 year old can do almost anything I ask her but won't and the 20 month old has got to be capable of doing a few things around the house

Answer 1

i think dishes  and vacuming some is good and when u ask her to do it show her that makes u happy and like give her some money even if its like a doller hey she wont know thats not alot and will show her responsibility..and for the 20 month old make her pick up their toys and do the same with her about their rewords

Answer 2

A 4-year-old can help set and clear the table, make  her own bed, put her own clothes away, help you sort laundry, gather up smaller garbages and empty them into the bigger kitchen trash, clean up her toys, and feed the pet, if you have one.  Of course you'd need to follow up on the feeding the pet one to make sure the pet gets fed.  My 4-year-old also helps in the backyard with picking up grapefruits that have fallen off the trees and putting them into the yard waste trash can.  He also helps me hose off the patio when it's really dirty.

A 20-month-old can clean up toys and maybe help dust.  I wouldn't require a 20-month-old to do much more than that, though.  They are eager to help, but not really able to help in a big capacity.

Answer 3

For the 4-year old.

Make it a chore that if you take something out, it's put away by you before you leave the room.

Have her attempt to make her bed, even if it's not how you like it. Teach her a few times, but if she doesn't do it right, just take a big breath and re-do it to your liking.

Have her brush her teeth, comb her hair and get dressed in the morning.

Have her put away any clothes she can reach.

Have her watch the baby while you do something within eyesight.

Buy her a child sized broom or vacuumn and have her do her room once a week. Have her dust tops of tables and chairs. You will need to redo it, but make it seem like it's the biggest help you have ever gotten, and give them 2 or 3 stickers for it.

If you spin it like 'You are a big help to mommy, and she really appreciates that. Everytime you do a chore, you get a sticker (or something similar),"  she'll think she's being a great little help, and will help more. when she gets a number of stickers, get her something that she wants, like a Barbie or a video game. You said your daughter 'won't' do the work. So, while she needs to know there are benefits do doing the work, there should also be consistent consequences. For everything she doesn't do, take a sticker off her chart, and if she gets down to 0 stickers, give her a time out, or something similar. And have an effect for each chore that's not done, that happens the moment it doesn't happen.

If she takes something out and doesn't put it away, it get's set on "Mommy's Shelf" for a day, because it was making a mess. She should be able to see it, but not get to it. If she tries to get it, take it away for a few days. Or if it's a set, like a dollhouse, take the entire dollhouse.

If she doesn't make her bed, she doesn't have it made by you, and it should be done by lunch, or she doesn't get a chance.

If she doesn't brush her teeth, comb her hair and get dressed before you are ready to go, let her go out in her PJ's, uncombed hair and, if you can stand it, unbrushed teeth. If you can't stand it, tell her that she didn't act like a big girl, and Mommy will have to do it, like she does for 20-month-Old Baby.

If she doesn't put away her clothes, take them away for a few days, and then put them in the same place, remind her to put them away a few times, and leave it. If she still doesn't, donate it to charity, or if it's a heirloom, very expensive, et cetera, put it aside where she can see it with a picture of the 20 month old and a clothes icon underneath. She wasn't responsible with her clothes, so they are going to someone who will care for them.

If she leaves the baby alone or is mean, tell her she and the baby should just sit on chairs silently until you are ready to go. Or make her sit on the stairs, quietly.

If she doesn't do her housework, put her with the baby the next week, and remind her why she's being treated like a baby. If the baby's in the playpen, put the 4-year old in there or very near it. If the baby's taking a nap, the 4-year old does, too, and she's silent. If the baby's just sitting, let the 4-year old sit, too.

For the 20-month old, she isn't really big enough to do lot's of stuff. Have her pick up anything she takes out and put in the place she took it from.

Have her wipe her and her sister's placemat or highchair with a wet sponge after meals.

Have her get dressed, if she can, and get her things together, like shoes, et cetera.

Have her fold her blanket, if it's small, and put it on her bed/crib.

Both girls should have the responsibilities of getting their pj's on when you send them to their rooms for the night, brushing their teeth at a sink they can reach, and putting their clothes on a dresser for you to decide whether they are clean or dirty. They should both go to the bathroom and be in bed when you come up in about 10-15 minutes. if they aren't, forgo a story or something else, or take away a privilege the next day.

They should have the 'chore' of giving mommy and daddy some alone time. once they are put in bed and their door is shut, unless it's an emergency, they shouldn't come out. if they need water, milk, kisses, to be tucked in, et cetera, they should do it before the door is shut. just like any other chore, if this is not done, they should be sent back to bed without a word, and left. continue that, even if they are crying, until they stay in bed. in the morning, tell them that it's not okay to bother mommy and daddy, and that if it happens again tonight, they will lose a privilege tomorrow. the privilege might be TV time or a story the next night.

Like with the 4-year old, the 20 month old should have consequences, too, just not as severe or tough.

IF she doesn't put away her things after she uses them, take them away, and follow 4-year old procedure.

If she doesn't wipe her placemat, she doesn't get playtime or a story until it's done. Leave it dirty and hold her to it.

If she doesn't get dressed, sit her on the stairs while you and her sister get ready and dress her as you are leaving, looking disappointed.

If she doesn't fold and put away her blanket or other care toy, she doesn't get it that night. Don't let up on this. It may take a few nights of crying, but she will get it.

Answer 4

i wouldn't load them with chores there too young but i would say maybe

cleaning there rooms (putting there toys up)

wiping the table after dinner

and for the 4 year old putting her clothes away

to get them to do it make it a game, set a time clock and whoever finishes there chores first gets a star on there chart which you should make and at the end of the week the person with the most stars and chores completed gets to pick a family activity for the next day like going to the part biking ridding or maybe movie night

Answer 5

The trick is to make everything a game and have a small reward system for your children when they do something useful.

Your children are quite little so ease them into helping at home.

The 20 month old will need supervision but you can play a game of put the toys in the box. When he/she is done then you will have to give them acknowledgement of their good task. This will encourage the idea that when they do certain things they get recognition.

The 4 year old can help with folding - but not ironing clothes, tidying her own room, buy her a nice drawer system for toy storage and paint it in a nice bright colour and maybe you could get her to help with dusting by letting her be the cleaning fairy (get her the appropriate props like a tutu, put music on and give her the duster for a wand). She could also help with making cookies and you could get her interested in helping in the kitchen (without using sharp knives or hot stoves or kettles) maybe she can help with breakfast in the morning by getting the bread and putting it in the toaster for you.

You are the parents and so this does mean that you'll be doing a lot for these little guys. Until they become independent little humans, you will have to let them do small things until they can manage the responsibilities.