What are my odds of getting the second child?

Question

We adopted a little girl and we have had her for a year. In September her brother has come up for adoption because the parents rights are going to terminate very soon. We have met the little boy and want him to join our family. We live in Texas- the foster family did not want to adopt but there grown daughter does. Well when the foster family found out that the state will most like place him with us because they are siblings they changed their minds and want to adopt. (to keep him in the family) They are a older couple (i know it does not go by age so please don't nag me about that) My question :is it more likely he will be placed with us because he is the sibling or will he probably remain with the foster family since this would be less of a disruption to his life? Plus he has been with them for more than 6 months. I know the judge ultimately decides but I guess I more or less would like opinions of anyone that has had this situation. Thanks

Answer 1

Oh, this is so sad.  My heart breaks for the little boy either way.  It will be so hard for him to loose the foster family he has known if he is placed with you.  My daughter was 9 months old at adoption and grieved heavily for her foster family.  But, it also is so sad to think that he would be separated from his sister if he is not placed with you, and I think it would be best to be placed with his sister.  I think it is likely that the judge would try to place him with his sister, but it is hard to say without knowing more details.

Answer 2

In Texas when a foster child's sibling comes into care they are supposed to look to see if there are any other siblings in care and try to place together if possible.  They like to keep siblings together.  They should have checked with you when the sibling came into care.   It sounds like they didn't.  Since this other child has been placed with the foster family for what sounds like awhile, they get first "dibs" if you will, if they do not, and CPS is now aware that you want the sibling, then they will come to you.

Answer 3

A lot depends on what the worker recommends. Most times they try to keep siblings together. If the child has not been in the foster home for 12 months or more, then in most states they would not have standing. They can tell the worker that they want to adopt but so can you. So the choice is to leave the child were it has been for six months or move the child to were the sibling is. I would talk to the worke and quickly get your homestudy updated. They can't even look to move the child til you have an updated approved homestudy so they will take that in to account with regards to how long the child will have been in the foster family at the time of movement. I have adopted 3 children and in the process of adopting a 4th. My two older children are birth siblings and when they new the second one was coming though the system and needed to be adopted they contacted me as the adoptive mother of the other child. We quickly got the homestudy updated and my second daughter came to me at 10 months old, she had been in the same foster home since birth but they still wanted her to be with a sibling. That was 10 years ago.

So good luck and make sure that they know that you want to adopt the sibling.

Answer 4

As an adoptee - I think it is far more important to keep the siblings together - if at all possible. It is what is best for the children.

But who knows what the law thinks.

Sometimes decisions are made that are not in the best interests of the child.

Sad really.

If it were me - I would try to find reported studies on the benefits of keeping siblings together - and give them to your lawyer. Do your research.

Good luck.

Answer 5

I hope you get this little boy for their is nothing like having a true sibling.  I hope the judge see it this way and what foster parent would want to come beween sister and brother. And what do you mean keep him in the family if they feel that way they sould sent him with family-the home where his sister is. You said they were young like 2 and 1 year old they aren't going to remember these foster parents. Anyway that's what they are foster parents. Good luck and I will pray for you all. If you don't get the little boy I would ask the judge to let the children have contact with each other anyway.

Answer 6

I believe the siblings belong together....alot has to do with how much time they have spent together. Or do they know each other.  If the sibling is attached to this family and doesn't really know his sister then it might be better for the boy to stay where he is.

Answer 7

I hope you get custody of that little boy.  I believe that siblings should be kept together.

Answer 8

I would hope that a judge would rule to keep the siblings together. Good luck to you.