What are some funny facebook statuses?

Question

What are some funny facebook statuses?

Answer 1

P|3AS3  ADD  M3.. IM N3W IN Faceb00k

my name is >>>>>>>>>>> Natassa Mustand <<<<<<<<<<<<

Answer 2

got kidnapped by ninjas

puts the pro in procrastinate

says skittles don't taste like the rainbow at all

Answer 3

-standing behind you, with a cup of coffee and a smile on his/her face

-unable to come up with a funny status, please send flowers

-recovering from a failed attempt at skydiving (or insert other random thing here)

-not funny

-going to audition for So You Think You Can Dance...seriously.

Answer 4

is a duck;

is dreaming about aardvarks;

kissed a squirrel and liked it;

is (your name here);

wants to be a dinosaur;

thats all i could come up with =)

Answer 5

Friendship is like peeing on yourself, everyone can see it, but only you get the warm sensation it brings.