What are some great disses that are appropriate for an 11-year old?

Question

My 11-year old wants some disses, could you help her out? I gave her all my good one's:

Ugly ones: 1)You're so ugly that when you were born you came out backwards and nobody noticed. 2)You're so Ugly that when you were born you mom said "Put it back in! put it back in!" 3)You're so ugly that you went on a blind date and you blinded your date. 4)You're so ugly that when you look into a mirror it cracks.

Fat ones:1)You're so fat that when you go on a weighing scale it reads: "To be continued" 2) You're so Fat that when you wear a yellow rain coat people call: "Taxi Taxi!" 3)You're so fat that when you go on a weighing scale at the doctors office it said:"one at a time please"

Stupid ones: 1) You're so stupid that you think milk came from the milky way.

We're in need of more! lol it's just for fun, these are pretty cheesy but we like them ;) STAR IT! thanks!

Answer 1

irresponsible parent

Answer 2

you so fat, you got your own zip code

you so fat, when you visit people they say "pull up a sofa and sit down"

you so ugly, even your shadow runs away

you so mean, you wouldn't give someone the time of day

Answer 3

you're so fat, God can't even lift your spirits!!!!