What are some potty training tips you can offer me?

Question

We've been working on potty training my daughter. She's 2 years and 9 months old. She'll use the potty only occassionaly. At school, they take her to the potty on scheudle and she'll usually use it two or three times. But each time they take her, she has a wet or dirty diaper.

She shows no real interest in being potty trained or using it at home. We even tried to reward her (with stickers she can place on a calendar each time she uses it, or even with candy). But when we ask her, she'd rather not have the candy if it means using the potty.

We even tried putting "big girl" underwear on her. She has never really cared if she gets wet or has a poopy diaper. It doesn't ever bother her unless it gives her a rash.

We're running out of ideas. We got books and videos to show her on using the potty but she has little interest.

Thanks for your tips.

Answer 1

Give her a little more time. People will go crazy on this but my youngest was the same way. She missed her first year of preschool because of it. It is not that big of a deal to not have 2 years of preschool. She only had one and was still at the top of her kindergarten class because I worked with her at home.

Anyway back to the training. She did not take a real interest until clsoe to 3.5 we kept working on it in the meantime but did not force it either. One thing that really worked for her was a timer. If I told her lets try to go she pitched a fit, if a timer beeped she got up and did it no problem. I used our oven  timer because it is very loud. Or you could get a cheap digital timer and set it, do not get the dial kind the ticking is annyoing. I set it for every 20 minutes until she was doing better then moved it to 30.

But above all patience and understanding. Turns out my daughter has medical reasons we just did not know that at the time. She has bladder problems and does not have the sensation until she is overflowing.  

Answer 2

Casey, 1st of all, dont listen to any friends or family members. 2nd, must maintain your teaching consistency with your child as children require repetition in order to learn a new skill or to broaden their vocabulary. 3rd, the next thing you know.. your child would want to tell you she wants to do everything herself.. Maybe you can refer to the site I recommend. I've really benefited from it and my boy is showing progress..Hope this helps

Answer 3

My son is 3 1/2 yo

He JUST now will go potty and its still a bit of a fight . He'll only go if he wants something . Mine used to fight me at that age . He wouldnt even sit on the darn thing . Maybe she isnt ready ?

Answer 4

it's really hard...trust me i know my son was over 3 before we finnaly got him potty trained. What I did was praise him everytime he used the potty. And i took him every so often ( i know its annoying but like every 20 mins) to the potty and just had him sit there. I put real underwear on him during the day that way he could feel when he was wet (pull ups are jsut like diapers) and eventually he got the idea. You just gotta be consistant...and let her no it's not okay to use the bathroom on herself anymore because shes a big girl not a baby. And maybe come up with an activity she wants to do really bad and then tell her she can do it when she starts using the potty because its a big girl activity. KWIM? good luck!

Answer 5

I agree with Wishy.  At almost 3 she does understand though Casey.  Take her shopping for "big girl panties".  Let her pick out her own - maybe Barbie panties, or something else that she likes.  Explain that these are special panties for special girls and they are clean and pretty just like she is.  Big girls that wear big girl panties get to do big girl things, too - like maybe paint Daddy's car (with a paint brush and a bucket of water) or wear Mommy's shoes all day Saturday . . . something like that.  If it doesn't work - send her to me for a week or so and I'll do it.  I'm a fvcking potty trainer from way back.  **huggles you so tight and loves you for being such a great Daddy** ♥

Answer 6

It sounds like she's really not ready for it yet-this isnt a big problem as in my preschool we have children who are in pull ups till they are 4. If they are still showing no interest at 4 then we look into it with more focus.

So I would stop for now. Have knickers etc ready for her for incase she changes her mind but for now just leave the potty in a place she can get to at home, keep spare knickers in her bag just incase for day care. You never know the realisation that no one in pushing her anymore may make her want to try....kids are great like that!

But in the meantime whenever she shows interest then praise her even if its a small gesture. When she does need nappy changing dont make too big a fuss do it quite quickly and quietly as she will learn that this isnt a good time for attention!

The daycare should be offering you help and advice esp if they have her most of the day so you may want to speak to staff who know her personality more than us.

Answer 7

sounds like she's not ready yet.....give her until she is 3-31/2 then try again....you can't push the issue and every kid is different...even brothers and sisters.....

Answer 8

Yeah, it sounds like she's just not ready.  I had the same problem with my youngest son.  He just didn't care.  

The only thing that worked for me was to just stick with the routine, over and over again, so that it becomes ingrained in their head. Also, I made a habit of taking him about 30 minutes after his afternoon and evening meals, because he had a tendency to have a bowel movement shortly after finishing his larger meals.  

I know you're frustrated, because I was almost ready to give up and keep him in diapers.  But, something eventually "clicks" with them, and they start to cooperate with the training schedule.  Just be patient, keep a positive attitude and remember to reward her *lots* when she uses the toilet successfully.  

Don't worry, it will happen eventually.  

Answer 9

First off, trying to make her will only push her away more. A child has to be ready themselves not have it decided for her. So nothing you do, a reward system or by force will get her to do it.

What I would do is leave the potty seat in the bathroom and explain to her that it will be there for her when she is ready. Also maybe having mommy take her with her while she uses the bathroom can help too.

At 2 years old she is still within the range of normalcy and I know for a fact that girls take longer than boys to be potty trained.

One thing I STRONGLY recommend is to NOT use pull ups, those only enable them to use the bathroom like a diaper and actually makes potty training a lot longer. Keep encouraging her to use the potty, but do not force or get frustrated, this like all other things takes time and willingness on your daughters part, before you know it she will be ready.

Answer 10

It takes a lot of time and patience. The most important thing is to be consistent. She also has to have it set in her mind that she is a "Big girl" and she has to want to use the potty.

Sometimes girls are easier. It almost seems like they are less stubborn than little boys.

It might help for her Mom to take her to the bathroom too so she can see what she's supposed to do.

If you had a boy, I could give you a great suggestion that I plan to use when I have a boy.

When my Mom was potty training my lil brother, she put Cheerios or Fruit Loops in the toilet and told him to shoot them. It worked!!!!

Answer 11

My first piece of advice is to be patient. It takes some children a while to train, and others may catch on immediatly. Second, be consistent. When first training, take her to the potty often. Take her as soon as she gets up in the morning, after breakfast, then every thirty minutes, after nap, or anytime after she drinks. Make a huge deal of it if she goes when you take her. Make her feel like she is the most special little girl in this world. She will eventually get the hang of it and want to go. I recommend not using pull ups or diapers. I know, it gets messy and time consuming to clean up pee and poopy pants every hour,but pullups just confused my children. They felt like the pullups were diapers and used the bathroom in them and never thought anything of it. If you will put panties on her, she will learn what it feels like to be wet and dirty, and she will not like it. She will stop going in her panties. Just remember, be patient. It takes time. She's going to have accidents, but you need to be supportive.  Maybe even take her to the store and let her pick out a special potty that's all hers.