What are your 3 favourite practical jokes and/or top 3 blonde jokes?

Question

My three practical jokes are:

1. Putting Plastic Wrap in my parents bedroom doorway/bathroom doorway

2. Shaking up a can of juice so people think its pop then open it in someones face cuz it doesn't shoot out cuz it isn't carbonated but people get SOOOO freaked!!

3. Putting a ripped-up black patch on one of our leather chairs so it looks like the kitten scratched it up

Top three blonde jokes:

1.

Q. What do blondes say when they see Cheerios??

A. Look! Doughnut seeds!

2.

Q. What did the blonde write back when she got a letter that said she was dumb??

A. Hay, yu speld 'smart' rong!

3.

Q. How do you get a one-armed blonde to fall out of a tree??

A. Just wave!

And no offense to blondes, in fact I am a blonde and know that people don't really think we're dumb... BTW my IQ is 148 so you can hardly call me dumb!!

Luv,

Moon Wolf

Answer 1

joke1

A blonde went to get her hair cut, but she was wearing headphones. The stylist said, “You need to remove your headphones or I can’t cut your hair.”

The blonde replied, “No. I can’t! I’ll just die without them!”

So the stylist agreed and trimmed the ends of the blonde’s hair until she fell asleep. The stylist thought to herself, “I’ll just take these off her to cut the rest of her hair. She won’t even notice.” So the stylist did it.

A few minutes later the blonde fell out of the chair dead!

Surprised, the stylist said, “I wonder what could have possibly killed her? Maybe it had something to do with the headphones after all.”

So the stylist took the blonde’s headphones and put them on her own head to see what was playing. On the headphones a voice repeated, “Breathe in, breathe out.”

joke2

A blonde walked into a store to buy curtains.

She went up to the salesman and said, "I want those pink curtains to fit my computer screen.

The salesman mentioned, "Computers don't need curtains."

The blonde said, "Hellooo…. I have windows!"

joke 3

Someone saw a blonde eating a Tootsie Roll Pop and asked her, "So, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll - Tootsie Pop?"

Without a thought, the blonde replied, "Beats me, but it took almost the whole day just to l**k through the wrapper."

Answer 2

One of my favourite jokes is when you say that palm readers can tell which hand you right with by seeing which thumb nail is longer. Then say but under water it is the opposite. show them how a pencil looks broken under a glass of water. Then make them put their thumbs flat on the counter and put the glass on it. They can't do anything now so just walk away