What are your thoughts on a foster child baby shower? Yes or no? We don't have kids and decided to foster.

Question

Because we have no children of our own my in-laws want to throw my husband and I a foster child baby shower and are asking family and friends to give us gently used items we can use. We will appreciate all that we get but since I've never heard of or thought about a foster child baby shower I don't feel comfortable with the idea just yet. We do not have a foster child yet either but will in the next month.

Answer 1

I don't see why not my family does foster care but I would be careful sometimes having the child too attached isn't always the best thing because what if the child can't stay, no I would wait for an adoption so that the child can tell weather or not he/she is staying besides when their birthday rolls around they'll be excited for that.

I'm just worried that you'll get too attached, it happens to me all the time.

well I hope this helped you and we haven't thrown any "parties" for the children. I mean if its an infant then yeah go right ahead I wish we did that but if it is an older child I wouldn't because its like throwing a party after you have been taken from their homes I would just make sure that they feel like they are safe and that they are safe.

I hope I didn't ruin any parties but yeah that's my opinion.

Answer 2

I think the first time you have a foster child its acceptable. But, after that one it wont be.

Answer 3

I think that's a wonderful idea, I'm so glad your wonderful in laws thought of that. Asking for gently used gifts takes off the pressure for friends and family too. Congratulations on your new arrival your doing a wonderful thing. I pray if something ever happens and Nicky needs help there's someone like you and your family to help him. God Bless

Answer 4

Are you sure you are getting a BABY????

What if you get a 10 year old foster CHILD???

I think its a great idea. As long as its age appropriate.

Answer 5

Wow, great idea! Plus who doesn't enjoy the party...shower! Putting "gently used items" on he invitation is a fantastic idea.

Answer 6

I think it's a wonderful idea. Especially asking for "gently used items".  I wish it had been thought of for us.

Answer 7

I think this is a wonderful way to get a good supply of things needed for the foster children in your future.  Especially as they will not be bringing  lot of supplies and clothes with them.  Best of wishes to you and your family.

Answer 8

I think it's a great idea.  I know when I was actively fostering we always sent a bunch of things with our babies when they went home or to their new home.  It seemed like if they went to relatives the relatives didn't always have a lot of supplies or clothes so I'd pack up a few bags and boxes and send with them.

Anyway, you'll need everything you can get.  Be sure to pack everything away in boxes labeled by s*x, season and size so whenever you get a new child you can just pull out the appropriate box.

One caveat:  please don't have the shower after the child arrives if the child is old enough to understand.  It's nice to throw a little welcome party with a special meal after they've settled in a little but they feel guilty if they're having a party to celebrate being taken from their parents.

Answer 9

it sounds like a great idea, many foster children do not have much, some carry what little they have in garbage bags. I'm sure the child would love for you to have things for him or her.

Answer 10

I think it's a very good idea, and definetly take pictures to put in a small album for the child. Whether the child ends up living with you perminently or just temporarily, knowing that their arrival into your family was celebrated just like any other child will definetly mean a lot to the child as he or she grows up.

I also like including "gently used items" on the invitation. Parents often have so many baby clothes and toys that their kids have out grown. Since you feel a little hesitant about the shower this way you won't feel like your asking people to spend money, however I assume you'll get some new things too.

Answer 11

Hi, I am loving chiming in on all the foster care questions because my husband and I are foster parents. We have been TTC for 6 years and we havent been blessed with any biological kiddos.  First off, I have wondered stuff like this all the time.  Hey, if people can get pregnant and have people give them a shower than why not you.  Your new foster kid is just as special and wanted as any other kid.  Only problem is too many people see us as glorified babysitters since they arent your biological kids.  Lemme be the first to tell you that NONE of that matters.  I hate the "foster care" label.  My kids may not be biologically mine but they are MY kids.  They are truely gifts from God!!!  I never got a shower (and maybe because you could have MANY foster kids and it may be hard to do that for ALL of them) but I was surprised at how many people came through for us and bought them tons of stuff.  New things obviously and hand-me-downs (which I see nothing wrong with).  If your inlaws are going to be kind enough to do this for you, LET THEM!!!  I think it is a great gesture and they are showing you support by doing it.  You are blessed to have inlaws like that.  I think you should be just as proud of your foster kids as if they were yours and just as happy as if you brought it home from the hospital so I would say, soak up all the happy baby/kid moments as possible.  Enjoy it.  You deserve to be doted on just as much as a woman who gives birth.  I sure hope I helped in some way.  Good Luck and God Bless you and your family

P.S. Feel privilaged you have been called to foster children.  It takes a special person to love someone elses child as their own and may you will be truely blessed by that.

Answer 12

I think it sounds like a great idea!

Answer 13

i think it is a good idea. alot of foster kids dont have good foster homes because SOME (not all!!) people that foster just do it for the money from the government or whatever! (horrible i know) I think that this would be great, your bringing a child into your home and are going to love/treat it as if it were your own! I would do it!