What can I do? My X is taking our 13 yo son out of the state & he is supposed to give me 30 days notice? ?

Question

Our son was supposed to go on vacation with me and my father, sister, daughter and my husband next week.. This has been planned for a year and Yesterday 4 days before we are scheduled to go they tell me - Sorry - He is coming with us to Florida instead. Even though we have talked about this numerous times over the year about him coming on vacation - It has been planned a long time -- AND he missed it last year for the same reason!!! What can I do? DO I petition the court? Do I violate him on our current order?

Answer 1

Your son is 13 years old and can make decision such as vacations on his own. If he'd rather go on his father's trip there isn't much you can do about it.

Forcing your son to go with you can lead to bigger problems.

Try talking to your ex next year and maybe you can coordinate for 2009's vacation

Answer 2

This can be a difficult issue and here's the problem.  Legally you are right.  You can get a lawyer and a court involved and you will "win" the right to have your son go on vacation with you.  What could also happen is your ex's visitation rights could be taken away from him if he does this too often.  Unfortunately, your son is old enough to know what is going on and may be hurt by your "attack" to his father.  

What you should do is talk to your son about the situation.  Although he is 13 and a "minor" he still has a right to have his feelings heard. He should be able to choose who he wants to go on vacation with.  Maybe you could even make a deal with him that even years he goes on vacation with you and odd years he goes with his dad.

Of course, this depends on his relationship with his father.  If he has a great relationship, with him, you might end up looking like the bad guy if you go to court.   If he doesn't have a great relationship with his father and could care less about who he goes on vacation with, then do what you want with the courts.

Answer 3

You notify him in writing (return receipt/registered mail) that you are informing the courts that he is in contempt of the custody,then follow thru with it! he pulled it once without having to answer for it, so he thinks he can do it again....up to you if he gets away with it.

Answer 4

As long as you notified him in writing about your vacation you can put him in contempt of court.   Go to your attorney today and stop him.  Make sure you have dotted your i's and crossed your t's and then fight him.