What can I do about a destructive, foul-mouthed child if his parents ignore his behavior?

Question

He's my cousins son, about 8 years old now. He's the worst behaved child I've ever encountered. When he was 5, he told me to go f*ck myself. Last christmas, he looked me dead in the eye and said "Give me what I want right now, or I'm going to b*tch slap you with my c**k!" (He's always been allowed to watch whatever he wanted on tv, which is where i'm sure he got the language) His parents laugh it off as a phase- a phase thats been going on as long as the kid could walk and talk, and he's only getting worse.Knowing his mom, she's just too lazy to do anything about it. The rest of the family thinks that if you ignore a problem, it will go away, and won't say anything.

The only time I've ever disciplined the kid was for trying to steal my wine (and all I said was no, you may not have that), he flipped and broke half my aunts good china. His mom yelled at me for upsetting him!

Anyway- is there anything I can do at all? Even just to change how he speaks to me?

Answer 1

I would  say call social services, this kid has no chance in life with a family like that bringing him up. He will end up a very disturbed child.

Answer 2

Really onlye seeing this child a couple of times a year isnt going to help.

But mabee call him and ask him to dinner at mcdonalds....when you get there treat him with respect and when he shows you any dissrespect tell him that its innappropriate....if it continues take him home....even if dinner isnt done...

Then try again the next week....and the next... and the next....he may never change the way he act with his mom...but he will grow to appreciate the time with you.....Children learn what they are shown...Show the child that HE is loved and respected.

You may look into the "big brother/big sister" program too!!  Mabee all this kid is some very indiviual attention, and some boundaries.

My niece is the same way 3 1/2...i finally took her a couple of days a wk...she is now potty trained, and doesn't drink from a bottle ( at my house)...She knows what her boundaries are with me..and now enjoys her time here.

Good Luck!!

Good Luck

Answer 3

OMG at 5 he was talking like that. BAD PARENTS! hello. They are to blame.

Poor kid, and poor you. I doubt you can do anything to change the way he speaks to you unless the parents step in but sounds like the damage is DONE. Just tell the parents & him unless he can speak to you properly you want nothing to do w/ him.

I mean-someone told me what he said to you. OMG! I think I would no longer be around.

Sorry about this crazy kid & parents. haha

Answer 4

Someone needs to help this kid before he is more seriously damaged. You need to get the family together on this one and do an intervention with the parents. This kid is not going to have a very bright future....he is going to get hurt when he pulls this stuff on the wrong person.

Answer 5

Unfortunately I don't see what you can do aside from try and speak to his parents but that seems as though it would be pointless. There are a couple kids like this in my husband's family and I just ignore them and avoid them. I have no problem saying something to the kid though.

Answer 6

unfortunately kids aren't born with with instructions and parents are not required to take parenting classes.

They will later regret they didn't put a stop on the child's behavior

Answer 7

Well I would just try and ignore it because you cannot change something that people ignore.  Since he is saying it directly to you just say " I don't talk to you like that so don't talk to be like that." If that does not work point out his behavior to someone (that are not his parents because obviously they do not care and I assume other people in your family agree with you) and maybe they will say something.

Answer 8

There is nothing you can do.  You're not this child's parent.  All I can suggest is that you not go to family gatherings when he is going to be there and to tell the host/hostess the truth about why you won't attend.

Answer 9

Wow - that is a very poorly behaved person, let alone a child.  It is a tragedy that his parents don't see it and are not helping him.

You should handle him (and his parents) as you would any other obnoxious person.  walk away....

child: "I want your wine"  -

you: (with a smile on your face and your best Mary Poppins voice)  "that's not appropriate and I won't be spoken to in that manner, excuse me"  and walk away, even if it is just to a different part of the room.

If he breaks the china, then the family needs a lot more counseling than you can give.

Think of it as a dance, and just be pleasant, overly sweet and just keep walking away.  Hopefully he will find another target.

As for this poor child's attitude, it is a shame that no one has taught him manners. He will, unfortunately, "get his" when he crosses someone who won't put up with his "tude".  

Not your cross to bear, and good luck at family gatherings.

Answer 10

ya know, i was kinda the same way (but without the language) all my mom did to stop me is to spank me until i wouldnt do it again and it really works!!! i kid you not, it works!!