What can I do about my grandma lying about me?

Question

I have been going to my grandma's house a lot, helping her run her errands, and spending a lot of time talking to her by phone and email. I was feeling really good about helping her, and I thought she appreciated my help and liked spending time with me too.

I was on her back porch after mowing her back yard for her, and I heard her talking to my aunt, saying all sorts of mean things like what a pain I am and saying she thought I cheated her out of change from the drug store. They stopped talking when I came inside to get a drink. I said I had to leave and when I got home, my mom said my aunt called her saying how rotten it is that I am taking advantage of Grandma! I mow her lawn, run her errands, spend time with her, take her to her senior-citizen club meetings, etc. using my time, car, gasoline, etc. so how is that taking advantage of her?

She is the one who invites me over and asks for help, I didn't cheat her out of anything (she gave me a $20 bill, and the receipt shows I paid with a $20, and I gave her the exact change, all 73 cents of it), and I do NOT get paid for helping her, and I never even hinted at wanting anything.

I did ask grandma about it, telling her that my mom really laid in to me for taking advantage of her based on what my aunt said, and Grandma said they are all lying and to ignore it, and then she reminded me that she has a senior luncheon today she needs a ride to.

I know my aunt and mom aren't lying, because I heard Grandma somewhat herself, like I said, so what do I do? I don't want people lying about me, but I also don't wan to seem childish over it all.

What should I do?

Answer 1

I would talk to your grandma about it.  Tell her that you overheard her talking to your aunt and that it's not fair the way she's treating you after all of the things that you have done for her.  Just see what her response is.

Answer 2

even though shes ur grandma, dont go back to her house for a while. then eventually she'll realize what a great help u were and how much she needs u. and if she needs u that bad she would learn her lesson and wont talk about u like that

Answer 3

dont help her..

take ur mum and aunt to her house and talk about it

Answer 4

You did all you can do.  You cannot stop her from lying, or control what people believe.

All you can do is decide if you want to keep helping someone who is going to lie about you.

Answer 5

I believe that I would ask your mom to call your aunt and all 3 of you sit down and have a talk.  You need to tell them that you are doing what you doing because you love her and want to help, but that if you are going to continually be accused of stealing and taking advantage of her, then they will have to take her to all the places that she needs to go as well as mowing her lawn.  Explain to them that you have never taken anything from her and that she has or had the receipt to show that you gave her back the correct change.  Now your mother should in your defense go to her mother and ask her what she is up to with saying that you her daughter is taking things and taking advantage of her, when you are in fact the one who is and has been doing all the work for grandma, and not asking for anything in return.

Answer 6

You need to tell your mother and aunt what your grandmother said. Your grandmother is showing signs of dementia or maybe even Alzheimer's. Suddenly lying and being paranoid(you cheating her out of money) are signs that something is not right in her mind. Tell your mother and aunt, together, what you are doing for your grandmother exactly, and tell them that if she is uncomfortable with you doing thing for her, you will stop and they can do it.