What can I do for my 4 year old who can't handle his pencil and the school's program requires him to do so?

Question

He has trouble with fine motor skills. I think he's still too young for handling well his pencil. But the school's program asks him to handle well his pencil and write or trace letters in handwriting. What can I do to help him with his motor skills?

Answer 1

Spend time with him playing with such things as Lego's (not the tiniest... but medium size-- smaller than duplos), coloring pictures or just scribbling, (circles and figure 8's help brain development) play with play-doh, etc.

Kids develop at all different rates, so don't be alarmed. Perhaps this is not the right school for him. Four years old is very young to have to trace letters. I had  7 children. Two of my kids were  writing at 4--- several didn't read well until nearly 8-- one read whole children's books before 5, but didn't write until past 7. I home-schooled so I could individualize instruction and let their own development and interests dictate what they learned when. They all ended up intelligent well-educated people.

Find a school (like maybe Montessori, etc) that emphasizes the individual rather than making him feel inadequate because he doesn't fit in their mold of what a child should be able to do at a given time.

Answer 2

Practice. What is it about the pencil grip that gives him trouble? Is it the grip? Is it maintaining his hold on it? Ask the school's teacher or teacher's aide as to what they see and what suggestions you have.

Perhaps you can buy him the large crayons meant for smaller hands and let him scribble for half an hour each day. It'll give you some peace and he can start his own gallery. Or perhaps the school will let you use a large pencil (can probably be bought at toy stores/art stores) while he gets used to it.

I know one thing that's supposed to help babies and toddlers is allowing them to rip up and tear magazines, if only to let them get  used to using their hands. Similar things for your son might be helpful.

Hopefully his teacher isn't pressuring him to be perfect in his handwriting, as 4 year olds certainly are not yet physically ready to have calligraphy-type writing. If he's being pressured it'll make school a lot less fun for him and his self-esteem will suffer. You may want to speak to his teacher or the head of the school if it seems like they're trying to push your son too hard.

Good luck!

Answer 3

I used to assist kids at an elementary school. We worked mainly on fine motor skills and reading. We did drawings, puzzles, at more. Anything where he's moving and workings his fingers. Another one was sand drawing, where you fill a tub with sand, and have them write letters in it. Or the chalkboard. It's just writing, but it's different than a paper and pencil and they seem to like it more. All practice is good, but I am surprised the teacher didn't reccommend exercises.

Answer 4

Have your pediatrician write a note that says that he is not capable of what they're asking.  Also, ask that he be screened for occupational therapy...that is who would help him improve his fine motor skills.  Both of my daughters qualified for OT, the county paid for it, and sent the therapist to my house to work with them in a comfortable setting, and helped them to brush up on their skills for Kindergarten.

They also recommended a pencil with a grip that made it easier for the girls to hold the pencil correctly, therefore writing more easily.  You probably can ask the physical therapist or occupational therapist at the local public school for a recommendation.

There are some things available on-line...

http://www.specialneeds.com/

Good luck!

Answer 5

Most 4 year olds can use a pencil.  You should take him to a doctor/psychologist and make sure nothing is wrong with him.

Answer 6

Practice, practice, practice  on your son's part & of course patience, patience, patience, on you & your son's part.  Keep telling your son he can do it & praise him often, A little bit of praise can go a long way, no matter what age.  :)

Answer 7

I have to say I am disturbed that your son is in a school program that is asking so much of him at such a young age.  He's still very young, and although you can push him to work on that, likely all you'll do is frustrate him because he's simply not developmentally ready.  This could lead to low self esteem and loss of desire to learn.  I'd try a pencil grip, if you feel you must, but my gut says back off and leave the poor little guy alone, he'll get it when he's ready.  I would consider changing school systems if I were you.  Any well-trained early childhood educator should know that a child's development at that age varies greatly from child to child and that there are certain times during that development where a child simply will not learn something until that part of his brain is open to the suggestion.  He  does not need his ego squashed by seeing other children do what he can't, that is not his fault.  This question makes me sad.

Answer 8

get him a jumbo pencil and hold his hands and help him along to trace be patient he'll soon get it some kids take a little longer than some

Answer 9

I agree with Rebecca.  Try a pencil grip first.  It worked wonders with a  six year-old in my class last year.  I recommend the first one below.  It forces the fingers into the correct position comfortably.

Answer 10

What state is your school in? 4 is kind of young to be able to hold it perfectly, but if his skills are well below what is developmentally expected ask the school about seeing its occupational therapist, who are specialists who work with those who need fine motor improvement.

Answer 11

Take him for an evaluation by a pediatric Occupational Therapist.  Schools have them as well as private clinics.

Answer 12

Hun he is 4 and a boy. I personally think he is too young to hold a pencil correctly. My oldest had GREAT motor skills as a 3 / 4 year old and he couldn't hold a pencil correctly at that age and I personally think it is wrong to put so much pressure on a child that young. My 4 year old and I color and trace letters and sing letter songs. He can count to 40, he can identify his letters and numbers, know his shapes and colors, he knows the name of plants (he thinks space and planets are cool). He is in Tae Kwan Do and he rides a Dirt bike (a PW 50 motorcycle)  I'm not a freak and I don't coddle my kids, I push them to do more and to do their best but I know their limits and I truly think this is too young.

Good luck!!

PS: I saw a post were somebody suggested you have him evaluated and gave you a web site for special needs kids. GIVE ME A BREAK. He is 4 he is not a special needs child because he can not hold a pencil. He is just plain and simple too young. Kids develop these skills at different rates.

Answer 13

well u could get him a pincil grip....that works some times...or u could show him how to hold it and then let him try...do that continusly until he gets it down

Answer 14

I think what you mean is he can hold a pencil but cannot write neatly and well yet. That has to do with eye-hand coordination, you can encourage him to do more jigsaw puzzle so as to train his eyes to recognize and remember lines, then he can put what he sees to the paper using the pencil.

Though younger kids cannot grip the pencil well, it will not affect the tracing and handwriting much as compared to eye-hand coordination.

To do it in a fun way, you can also draw with him and kids are natural learner, he will try to imitate your drawing (simple ones), from there, he can fine tune his motor skills.

Answer 15

Keep working with him .There are large pencils you can get , for those little hands that will give him better assistance.

Answer 16

Large chunky pencil grips will help, if he doesn't have fine motor control yet.  You can find some really neat ones at www.abilitations.com.  Have you asked the school WHY they feel that this is appropriate at 4 years old?  Yes, he should have better control of the pencil at his age, most children can do a pencil grasp by then (unless there is a physical problem to prevent this).  However, having children write letters perfectly at this age is not appropriate.  Ask the teacher what she is hoping to accomplish by having the children do this, because it is causing undo frustration for your son.  Perhaps there is another way he can meet the same developmental goal without making him feel like a failure.  

To help him strengthen the hand muscles, do lots of play with materials like playdough, scissors, theraputty (kind of like silly putty) and those "relaxation balls" that you squeeze and release.  All these can help strengthen those muscles in the hand needed for fine motor dexterity.  You can also request to have him assessed by an occupational therapist through your local school district.  An occupational therapist works on fine motor skills, and can give you valuable tools, information, and techniques to help your child develop their coordination.

Answer 17

Talk to his teacher and see if they have any flexibility on the subject.  If they are not willing to accept individual differences in motor development, then I suggest you find a different preschool.

At home, have him create works of art using  dry beans, small pieces of dry pasta and cereal and 3" lenths of yarn or string. Glue them to empty cereal boxes or foam meat trays (washed clean, of course).

Play doh also helps improve motor coordination.

Answer 18

Get a pencil grip..I had to get one for my daughter

Answer 19

If he is a young 4 year old, then the best you can do is continue to help him and he will eventually catch up.

Don't forget that all children are different and develop at different ages!  So don't let the school make you feel like your little one is not up to parr!

As for working with him, try these websites where you can print out pages for your child to trace and work on his letters and numbers!

http://www.dltk-teach.com/alphabuddies/m...

http://www.printactivities.com/Tracing.h...

Good luck to you and remember not to worry so much, he will get beter in time.  :)

Answer 20

Try buying the pencil grips that are used specifically for children who have writing difficulties.

Answer 21

I would ask the pediatrician for a referral to Occupational Therapy

he will then be tested and evaluated. If there is a problem,  we will work on his fine motor delays. Best of luck!

Answer 22

Well that is a tough muscle to force to work before they are ready. Here are some things Ido in my daycare for this trouble: tear paper, play playdough, squeeze a ball the size of the childs palm. Have you tried the chubby #2 pencils? What about the gripper that just slips on the regular pencil.

Answer 23

Get one of those little rubber grip things that slides on the pencil.  That might help.  Otherwise, all you can do is to help him practice, practice, parctice.  Just don't be too insistant on it or he will lose interest all together.  You can also help him by playing with smaller toys with him, like lincoln logs or things like that that require fine motor skills.

Answer 24

First, get him the big, think pencils (easier to hold) and then just have him practice at leats twice per day, Good Luck

Answer 25

get him tested, my daughter had a delay in that area too. I would ask the school to have him tested for delays.She gets therapy by a OT. I would write them a letter.

Also to help a lot of hand stuff like art, crayons coloring,chalk, finger painting, rolling play doe, making cookies

Answer 26

pencils are too thin for little hands!

start the little bugger off with oversized crayons! once they're better with it, large pencils, then regular pencils.