What can I do to cope with miscarriage?

Question

Right now, I think that I'm going through a miscarriage. I have all the symptoms (large blood clots/tissue, intense abdominal pain, etc.), and I don't know how to feel. I didn't intentionally try to get pregnant. Heck, I didn't even know that I WAS pregnant. This is my first pregnancy/miscarriage.I don't want to do a memorial though. I doubt that it even had a heartbeat or anything yet. I'm kind of relieved that I'm not pregnant, because I'm not in a good financial situation right now, but there's a part of me that's really disappointed because I'm in a long-term relationship.

Any advice would be appreciated. But please don't lecture me on my "irresponsibility" (i.e. well if you didn't want to get pregnant, you shouldn't have had unprotected s*x, etc.) I don't need that c**p right now.

Answer 1

if your going through it right now they you really should go to the emergency room ASAP. even if it can't be saved there can be some complications that can make it harder for your body to heal. if it has already happened you should talk to your doctor her/she may be able to direct you to a support group. you should also talk to your boyfriend he has a part in this too and he may be going though the motions of the loss to. you two may just be able to comfort each other. when my mom had a miscarrage it helped her to focus on my brother and me, it may help you to focus more on your family.

Answer 2

This may depend on the type of person you are.

If you are close with friends and family,it may help to be surrounded by people you know who love and cherish you.

It may even be helpful to talk with a friend who may have already gone through this.That is the best way i believe to get through it.

That person can open your eyes and give you insight you may not have because that person has already gone through it.

If you are the type of person who wishes to be alone then I would say

to make sure you are still taking care of your self. Dont stop eating or caring about your life and your job.

God will bless you when the time is right.

I am sorry for your loss.

Hope this helps Ma'am.

Answer 3

Sorry about what happened..I miscarried the first time I got preg. too and I just put myself in Gods hands. To me everything happens for a reason. The baby could have been born really sick and only live for a lil while. It's going to take some time but u'll feel better after a while.  

Answer 4

It actually happens a lot more often then you think. I wouldn't be too upset becuase you can have kids in the future especially when you are ready for it. I would go to a doctor to make sure though, before you tell your boyfriend.

Answer 5

The only advice I would give you is to get yourself to the doctor or a hospital as soon as possible because if you ARE pregnant, and you are having a miscarriage, than you may need to go get cleaned out, or at least checked out, and if you're not having a miscarriage, well you need to find out why you're in so much pain, and possibly have the doctor prescribe some motrin or something for the pain. Whatever it is you need to get checked out just to make sure something serious (miscarriage, bad period, hormonal disorder, endometrious, etc.) to find out what's wrong. Good luck, I really hope this helps.

Answer 6

you need to see a doctor do you have any family support my doughtier had one 1 year ago and she was much the same as you didn't know what she wanted its just your not ready yet in time you will be please go to a doctor you wont have to do any of that memorial stuff  

Answer 7

My wife and I lost our first baby when we were very young.

A few years ago I wrote this story. I hope you find comfort in it.

Al Letcher

I never knew you

I have always considered myself a philosophical person.

Here is my question.

Will we know, and be able to recognize, the souls of our unborn and stillborn babies when we get to heaven?

Jane and I were not married for very long when she became pregnant. We did not even know she was pregnant until she miscarried.

For all these 30 years, we never thought much about our unborn child.

Now medical science, and our Christian faith, has taught us that this was a living human being, with a soul, that died, before we got to know it.

Was the baby a boy or girl?

To me that is unimportant.

What is important is that I want to think, that when I go to heaven, I will see this person and he/she will know that I am its father and that Jane is its mother.

I am tempted to give the baby a name. It would have to be a cross-gender name. Perhaps Sam. Sam for a boy or short for Samantha.

We have two wonderful children and seven wonderful grandchildren, but what might have happened had Sam been born?

I am truly sorry on the one hand that I did not get to know the baby. On the other hand, I am happy it missed the bad things of this world. I am also sorry it missed the good things.

I am sorry we did not get to share life together and yet happy in the thought that Sam has been happy with God, the true father, all of these years.

Perhaps the passage of time is instantaneous in heaven and when Sam arrived, Jane and I were already waiting for him/her. Only God could do that you know.

The thought of Sam touched me and caused me to write this about, not only our unborn baby, but also all of the unborn babies.

I wish I could understand why some are given life, only to find it snatched quickly away.

I have thought, over the years, of many questions I would like to ask God, but I know that when I stand face-to-face with him all my worldly questions and worries will not matter.

I know too that an unknown soul is eagerly waiting my arrival in heaven. I hope I do not disappoint our baby.

I believe that the people in heaven cannot see or hear us here on earth because that would cause tears in heaven and everyone knows there are know tears in heaven.

So, I will shed earthly tears for my unborn child.

They will be tears of sadness, joy and anticipation.

I hope they have baseball in heaven so I can throw the ball around with our kid.

Love ya Sam.

Mom and Dad

Answer 8

You should definatly see a doctor to make shure.

I hope this is helpfull

Answer 9

I find you brave to put this out on yahoo.

thank you for sharing

1. Cranio sacral therapy 10 sessions

2. Look into the really dissapointed part

3. try and fortify your blood by eating lots of vegetables and fruits

4. c**p food is a c**p mood...

you have  my support and my light.

Answer 10

Let yourself grieve a little, maybe plant a tree in your yard-- something pretty that you like that can give you some closure. Also you can find support groups online of other people who have gone through the same thing and talk to them.

If it is very physically painful your doctor can give you medications to help speed the process and make it less painful.

Answer 11

I'm sorry you are having to go through this, no matter what the situation, a miscarriage is always an awful thing. But first things first, you NEED to see a doctor. There are so many factors that need to be taken care after a miscarriage, you just need to make sure everything is out, blood clots tend to sometimes stay in there, and they need to come out, as well as any tissue, if that stuff is not taken care of, it may cause an infection and you may still be pregnant, your hormone levels won't drop like they should. So def see a dr, and just take it easy, rest, but at the same time try and keep yourself busy, its very normal to be upset about this, and its ok to cry.  Take Care and Good Luck!