What can I do to fix this relationship?

Question

When my boyfriend and I became official, we soon discovered I was pregnant. So with that said, we rushed into moving in with each other and becoming Mommy and Daddy. We never really got a chance to date, although I love him with all my heart, we have had too many problems to count. Before we began dating, my boyfriend was the frat boy that parties all the time, drinks till he's passed and and popped pills to get messed up. He has straightened up a lot, but he is depressed and takes medication to take that feeling away. I have moved out twice since we have been together which has been about 2 years almost. And it is due to his lies and hiding things. He has only lied about minor things, like dipping, going out with his buddies and getting drunk, talking on the phone to girls who were old friends... things of that nature. I would never suspect that he would cheat on me, but I stay cautious anyways. He never talks to me about his feelings about me or about his life or what's going on with him. He kind of keeps things like that to himself, so the only way of tapping into his feelings is to read his emails to his family or look at his questions and answers on Yahoo! Answers. I have no idea how I can get through to him. I love him so much, and he has assured me that he loves me to and that there is a future for us and that he will work on his behavior. I'm just not sure I can believe. What can I do to make this relationship work? I don't want to lose him.

Answer 1

I had a similar situation when my husband and I first got married.  It all happend so fast.....moving in together, marriage, baby........it's an adjustment.  But I can't stress enough how vital communication is to a relationship.  There are so many things that we worry about that could be easily solved by sitting down and having a much needed talk!

Answer 2

Sorry to say but this is what happens when you make baby's without really knowing the person first, but you've done the right thing since and have tried to make it work.

He's immature and is having a difficult time adjusting to his new life of husband and father.  One day he's a frat party boy with no rules or worries and now he's depressed because he's  probably feeling like his time of playing was cut short and wasn't ready for this kind of responsibility. Tough situation for the both of you. All I can say is keep doing what your doing, being a loving wife and mother.  Most party boys grow one day, hopefully he'll come around soon.

Take care

Answer 3

You need to talk with him. I mean really sit down and talk to him and explain to him what is on  your heart and mind. If you don't, how will he get the chance to open up to you or to even know how you feel? If you don't communicate with him, sooner or later you two will go your seperate ways because a relationship cannot work without that communication. If he doesn't talk to you, maybe he feels he can't or whatever the case is, he doesn't feel like he can so let him know that he can. Tell him what you have been thinking and what you would like to happen, it could make the world of a difference! Take care!