What can I do to get my 4yr old to pick up toys?

Question

No matter what I have done I can't get my 4yr old to pick up his toys. I have taken toys away for the day. I have threatened to trow them away. Nothing works. Every time I try to get him to he always has an excuse anything from he is tiered to he doesn't feel good. He will do anything to keep from picking them up. Any advice? How do you get you kids to pick up after them selfes? I would rather teach him how to do it without having to make a game out of it everytime I want him to pick them up.

Answer 1

I have three daughters (10, 8, 7)

The ten y/o and the eight y/o can and will clean up after themselves with little to no instruction.  The seven y/o seems to get over whelmed with "clean your room".  I break it down for her and she does fine.  I will tell her to put all of her stuffed animals away.  Then move to the next task... pick up any clothes.... make your bed....

Sad but true, I don't think any of my kids were picking up after themselves (regularly) at 4 y/o.  My oldest daughter actually told me one time that her Grandma's ghost said that she didn't have to put away her toys

Answer 2

Who cares;;I just got 2 points!!

=)

Answer 3

You don't give a child a choice.  You teach them to pick up period all due to the "because I said so"  rule.  You are the boss not your child.   Just get a little tougher on him, he will learn.  You might have to implement time - out if he still does not listen.

Answer 4

"I have taken toys away for the day. I have threatened to trow them away."  

Don't threaten, DO! Here's what works for me and my family. It gets a cleaned-up public area once a day, which is plenty for a 4-year old kid to handle.

Sit the child down and explain the new rule: Right after dinner, ALL toys must be taken back to the child's room. Any toy that is outside the bedroom will not be there in the morning.

Remind the child ONCE a day, maximum, that it's time to gather the toys. No nagging ... he's used to ignoring it.

After the kid is in bed, make one walk through the house and pick up any toys and stash them in a hard-to-find spot. My sisters both used a lockable trunk in the garage.

Don't say anything to your boy ... his toys just vanish if he doesn't remember to pick them up.  They can reappear later (a couple of weeks to months ... one day isn't enough time), but just put them back in the kids room without saying anything. POOF they vanish and POOF they reappear. The only place they are safe overnight is in his room.

If you want certain areas to be off limit for toys ... master bedroom kitchen, whatever, also declare them toy-free zones and make all toys you find there vanish. Do not say anything! It's got to just happen magically. Pick the toy up and stash it somewhere until you can transfer it to the main stash.

Expect a few tantrums, whining and pleading but don't give in and don't give back a toy to shut up the whining.

Answer 5

I know you don't want to make a game of it, but I really think that's the best and easiest way. If you make a game out of it for a few weeks, he'll get used to picking up after himself and you can drop the game.

Another method is to say things like, "Okay, I'll pick up one toy and you pick up one toy." Continue like this until you can pick up one toy and he can pick up 20 toys.

The goal should be for your son to treat you, his toys, and your house with respect.

Good luck!

Answer 6

Only let the child get out one kind of toy at a time. until that toy is picked up they cant play with anything else. sounds silly but we have an aunt who we go visit regular. she does not have any young children but keeps toys for visiting kids. When kids come visit she tells them they can play with the toys but can only get out one kind of toys at a time and they cant get out the other toys till the first ones are picked up. My kids, who really arent the best at picking up after themselves, are absolutely meticulous about picking up all the toys in order to be able to play with the next kind when we go to her house.

Answer 7

Make it a game Get different colored bins for different toys like games go in red and trucks go in blue.  And you need to postivily reinforce the behavior.  Doing anything bad will not help.  So make it a game say if you fill up the red bin with the right toys you get a special desert after dinner.  Or he gets to do something special with you just you and him like if you fill the blue bin up correctly you get to pick what ever story and I will read it just you and me.  Make is special.  Make it fun and make it rewarding.

Answer 8

Next time you threaten to throw away his toys follow through with it and throw them away. You better believe he will act quickly next time you ask him. Another good habit to get into is to put away a toy before he gets out another.