What can a man do if he is victim to an abusive "wife"?

Question

I Have been living with this girl for 5 years (not married)

We have a daughter of 12 months....

She is physically and psychologically abusive threatens to take my daughter, and leave me alone with 5 years worth of debt (over 10k)

She is an equally abusive mother, she neglects our 12 month old daughter and nearly ignores her 7 year old daughter (who I love and care for)

Are there any governmental or public help that can help a guy in this situation?

Thank you Yahoo community!

Answer 1

I don't have an answer for you, but I suggest you repost this question under the law and ethics or the law enforcement category (under politics and government).  You may find someone there with better knowledge of exactly what you can do in this situation.

I am hoping for the best for you and the children.  Best of luck to you!

Answer 2

Get a restraining order against her , that makes her little bit scary,But you better go to court to get kids custody.

Good Luck

BTW : make sure call police each time she shows up the house,

Answer 3

There are some women out there who treat men poorly..... wow your physically and emotionally abused by your wife and your kids too.  Your self esteem must be so destroyed,  has your career grinded to halt due to the constant critisism and undermining?  Does your wife make you have unwanted s*x as well?  You must be fearing for your life,  have you thought of fleeing to a refuge or shelter? Have you tried calling the police for help?  Or does your wife block your way and cut the phone line?  Mate who really is the victim of abuse here?  You or you wife?    

Answer 4

If the children have your last name, you can leave her, and file for custody and child support.  other than that, you could report her to Child Welfare, but then it is usually hard to prove neglect unless it is extreme, such as not feeding a child, or physically abusing a child.

As for you, call the police when she starts physically abusing you, and make reports.  This will help you in getting the children.

Answer 5

Perhaps you should have picked up on this prior to bringing a child into this world with her. Maybe you could get a priest to perform an excercism on her? Cheer up man you are in a real pickle. 10 K in debt is nothing compared to the loss of your sanity. The best thing you could do is get a good old fashond divorce and get on with life. Your child is going to need a stable home and chances of you building one with this woman are slim. Get out and get ahead and then go for custody of your child.  

Answer 6

reach down and grab what you got between your legs.

time to stop being a wanker and act like a man.  don't let people walk all over you and definitely don't take any s*** from your wife or mother in-law.

divorce, restraining order, and a new attitude.

I hope you don't take this personal or think I'm being to crass but holy s*** man what's wrong with you?

dude...  take action immediately if not sooner.

if I understand you correctly this woman AND her mother are abusive to your kids as well?

there would be no governmental or public help for them in my case.  Anyone... and I mean ANYONE... including my wife, was ever abusive to my kids they would never find the body.  period

Answer 7

Yes of course there are agencies that can help you they are the same organizations that are created to help women in similar situations, just because of your gender doesn't mean you are automatically exempt from services designed to protect people from people............You cannot wait one second longer to start the ball rolling to stop this crazy and unmanageable madness .........Start by keeping a record of the attacks no matter if it is verbal or physical-date the incident and record the time the abuse starts and ends.......... Keeping a word for word journal of the c**p that spews from her mouth is also a good idea.......... maybe even secretly record and put her on camera.. .........BE the FIRST ONE to call the cops when she gets physical..........however use much caution when you do this, usually the first one whom calls the police will be the one they are more libel to protect............in the mean time do not detain her do not become engaged in a verbal shouting match do not touch her walk away-getting distance between you and she maybe you should plan to go to a friends or neighbors house these people could become an essential alli and/or witness ...........just understand she will more than likely try to turn the tables on you by instantly becoming a nobel prize winning actress...........watch as the damsel in distress emerges from the usual wicked witch-she will be brewing trouble though!!..........Be aware her bad acting job might be just good enough to bring to the surface sympathy and biased opinions from those you called to help you...........you will need courage and a determined tenacious mind to deal with the cynicism possibly malicious and insultive towards you simply because you are male.........you need to know that your 7 yr old will probably become one of your key witnesses the authorities invoved in this matter may request that you allow her to be interviewed........Our society still has trouble recognizing that men can be subjected and tortured by their women in their lives, just hold fast and try for your 7 yr old and 12 month old. I hope you will after gain freedom from terrible situation you will try to acquire custody of the 7 yr old girl, if not please try to gain some control in her upbringing and please do what you can to guard her mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical well being.............I truly comend you for not beating your wife down and that you have refrained from joining in on the negativity hatefulness and insanity of it all........I hope that your seemingly uphill battle won't be as steep as it even seems to me I wish you and the 2 kids the best of luck  

Answer 8

All physical abuse should be reported to the police.  You should also contact Child protective services.  You need to do what is in the best interest of the kids.  As for her threatening to stick you with 10k in debt, if you continue with this woman the debt will most likely continue to grow.  Get put now and cut your losses.

Answer 9

If she physically abuses you, call the police!  Get a restraining order against her that protects her from coming near you or the children.  Go to a homeless or domestic violence shelter if you need to.  Go to court and start the process to officially obtain custody of your child.  Start documenting everything she does now, by writing down the dates of when she has attacked you, etc.  Start making a list of witnesses.  It is not a hopeless situation for you.  You do need to take action, though, to protect yourself and your child.

Answer 10

Call the police, or the Child protective services, and get help immediately.

You need to report the abuse and neglect of her children and of you. Get full legal custody of your daughter and your common-law step daughter if you can, and keep them safe.  Hire a lawyer, then get her into counseling.

Answer 11

Sorry to hear this...Many men are abused by their wives/girlfriends. Most are too ashamed to admit it.

Maybe this will help-

http://www.dahmw.info/

Answer 12

Men can be abused just as much as women only its more embarrassing because men are supposed to be able to handle their women in our society. I don't know where you live so I don't have an exact address or organization. However, if you put "husband abuse support" in the search bar you will come up with several sites to help you. Good luck to you.  

Answer 13

yes, document it all every day in a journal. then file paper work out that explains joint legal physical with parents living 2gether. also fill out paper work on how you would want it if all h**l were 2 break loose. if the paper work is ready b4 emotions get stupid, it makes it easier.

Answer 14

The sad thing is there are not alot of resources for abused men. But here is a help line for men who are victims of domestic violence....

http://www.menstuff.org/issues/byissue/d...

Answer 15

Well I think you should get a lawyer and talk to him about this because i know that this is a serious question and some people are just going to give you some stupid answers.